Why Jennifer Love Hewitt Isn’t Married
Jennifer Love Hewitt will appear on today’s The Ellen DeGeneres Show where she’ll think it’s absolutely adorable to let men know she already has three specific engagement rings picked out and will lose her shit if you buy something else:
Ellen: Is this correct, you have a ring picked out for when you get married?
Jennifer: Well, I actually have three because I feel like I’m doing the guy a favor. I feel women are very confusing. We never know what we want and we’re not very good at nailing that down for them. And I feel like I don’t want to be upset if he picks a bad ring, so I feel like having three picked out and saying, “Look! Look at this plethora of things you can chose from!”
Ellen: So you tell them this ahead of time?
Jennifer: Well, yes.
Ellen: You say, “I have three rings picked out, should you decide…”
Jennifer: Well, if it gets to that conversation. If marriage comes up, I’m like, “You know what’s so weird. There is this store and there are three rings in it.”
Ellen: What store is it?
Jennifer: Tiffany’s. And if you chose one of these three, I’m going to be really excited. And if you go off on your own, we can have an awful, awkward moment. So why would you want to do that?
People always thought it was nuts that Jamie Kennedy broke up with Jennifer Love Hewitt because at the end of the day he’s Jamie Kennedy. But when you read something like this, it really puts things into perspective. Not unlike the Jessica Simpson conundrum earlier, at what point do awesome breasts stop being enough and the reality that you’re going to have to marry this person or get stabbed in your sleep starts kicking in? Because for me, it’d be on the way to the emergency room unless she’s right there in a tank top bouncing next to the gurney. In which case, yes, everything she said. I tripped carving a turkey. In bed.