VMAS: Beyonce is Pregnant

August 28th, 2011 // 58 Comments

Beyonce decided to sabotage the entire VMAs by announcing she’s pregnant on the red carpet. I’m going to assume Gwyneth Paltrow put her up to this because you have heard? They’re friends. Or at least are until Gwyneth demands the child be named Goopagelia Coldplay Carter IV. “Bey, I don’t want to play this card, but I will build a handpainted owl bone time machine and send you back to a colonial plantation. But only cause you my girl. Now gimme some daps.”

Photos: Getty


  1. Beyonce VMAs Pregnant
    Commented on this photo:

    Jesus Christ. Is she TRYING to trip and fall and kill her baby?

  2. jumpin_j

    Please, OH PLEASE can we just ignore MTV, period? They haven’t shown anything half decent since they aired a Tool video.

    • Mo'Lester Holt

      exactly…and WTF do we care about this dumb bitch being pregnant and about to bring another talentless, former store robbing, drive thru working piece of shit into the world?

  3. just here for laughs

    Looks like Sasha Fierce just got her upgrade.

  4. Beyonce VMAs Pregnant
    Commented on this photo:

    ….to be born on a yacht in St. Tropez, and plated in gold.

  5. Venom

    May her child get none of Jay Z’s looks.

  6. So, no destiny’s child jokes yet? First, losers.

  7. Beyonce VMAs Pregnant
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Goddam look at that ring.

  8. Sam

    That poor kid’s face…

  9. Beyonce VMAs Pregnant
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    I need a clearer shot of that bracelet.

  10. 5318008

    I did’t think you could get pregnant the way Jay-Z does it?!

  11. Beyonce VMAs Pregnant
    Commented on this photo:

    His dick is this long: the baby’s in my left lung

  12. Satan

    And so the AntiChrist shall be born.

  13. Sin

    She has to hope and pray that the kid has none of Jay Z’s genes. He is one UGLY dude. Money sure can get you anything you want. Thats the only way he could get a thing. FUGLY is more like it.

  14. kate

    Good for her, she seems like she’d be one of the more stable mum’s in Hollywood.

    • SuperficialAdmin

      theres no such thing as a stable mom. all women want to commit suicide after the baby is born

      • Amy

        That’s an awful thing to say, not all women want to commit suicide after they’ve had a baby. Post natal depression is a serious condition but not every mother suffers from it, and it doesn’t mean they’re not a stable mom if they do suffer from it. Maybe do some research before leaving offending comments? Oh wait, this whole website doesn’t do any real research, so go on.

      • Royal_T

        That does’t happen to black women!! I’ve never heard anything like that until Brook Shields wanted to cook her baby in the microwave!! ;-)

  15. Beyonce VMAs Pregnant
    ktb ( . )( . )
    Commented on this photo:

    Please stop holding your belly and pretending like you’ve accomplished something! Any dumb bitch can get knocked up. Seriously.

  16. Come_Honor_Face

    The biggest thing on this child will be:
    a) the ass
    b) the ego
    c) the lack of talent
    d) all of the above

  17. Beyonce VMAs Pregnant
    Commented on this photo:

    ktb fully agree

  18. forrest gump

    her “Planet Of The Apes” is soon coming to ya!!

  19. Tootles

    Who gives a flying fuck about this overrated bitch or her fugly husband. Her ass is going to blow up after popping out that kid. Stupid skank is so out of touch with reality.

    • dontkillthemessenger

      I actually like them as artists and I don’t give a fuck. NO ONE gives a fuck if these two have kids, don’t have kids, or start adopting white African kids in some reverse craziness.

      • Mo'Lester Holt

        artists? they paint? neato.

        I thought for a second you were referring to their wailing, rhyming words like a 3rd grader and wearing the fashion of the race that is sending America burning like Rome did, as artistic. I know that you werent because if you were that stupid, you wouldnt be able to type.

  20. Beyonce VMAs Pregnant
    Commented on this photo:

    Great. It’s breeding.

  21. josh

    She is going to gain so much weight. She will be bigger than in her best days, and it’s gonna be interesting.

    • mrsmass

      she has some serious blow up potential. she’s always teetering on the edge with her bottom half. i bet she will be as big as mariah.

  22. Beyonce VMAs Pregnant
    Commented on this photo:

    great shes giving birth to Cesar. now the monkeys will rule this world

  23. tlmck

    Poor kid is gonna have an ass like a Kardashian.

  24. Doc Schweinstrudel

    Congrats! Love her work

  25. Shyt

    I hope it’s a girl, and it looks just like him.

    • OnTheRealThough

      “If we had a daughter, guess what Imma call her – Brooklyn Carter”.

      Power move to make this announcement only days after the Will/Jada stock dropped 1000 points.


  26. ncumisa

    I’m so happy for u guyz beyonce & jay z you will be a great parent for ur child. God bless ur family wishing all de best.luv u

  27. Looks like Jay-Z’s about to have 100 problems.

  28. beyonce, im really happy for you. ill let you finish. but taylor swift has one of the most fuckable vaginas of all time! one of the best vaginas of all time!

  29. All the ho’s, “Put a thing in it.”

  30. I wonder if she’ll be creeped out by this baby too.

  31. mrsmass

    bitch acts like the world was waiting for them to procreate. get over yourself woman. and try not to fuck up the fetus with all your hair treatments.

  32. mammory

    jesus christ, what is she, 3 seconds pregnant? did jay z impregnate her while in the limo on the way to the awards as kanye watched? i hate how celebrities do that pose just so we know they’re not fat. she will probably keep doing the pose months after the baby is born because she’s going to get fucking HUGE!

  33. ChinoLatino

    Do you really think that JAY-Z did the deed or was it some kind of invitero shit for publicity to save face. I heard he is gay and very in love with Larry Johnson… DO a google if you don’t believe me.

  34. kimmykimkim

    Should’ve used a condom, ya slut.

  35. ricky rao

    who……the hell…….cares?!

  36. A.A

    From reading these comments most of ya’ll are saying harsh things, why not say Congratulations(I was really happy when she announced to the world) and go on with your life instead of calling her a Bitch. Beyonce is one of the nicest and most talented person in this world who isn’t corrupted by Fame I’ve loved her music since Destiny’s Child and I pray that baby will be born healthy and strong.

    Congratulations, Beyonce & Jay-Z

  37. Beyonce VMAs Pregnant
    Commented on this photo:

    im happy for her , she looks happy and healthy , & ii hope that this is the best time of herrr life .

  38. Beyonce VMAs Pregnant
    Commented on this photo:

    shes accomplishd a lot in life im very happy for herr & jay .

  39. Beyonce VMAs Pregnant
    Commented on this photo:

    i think there really is something to the conspiracy theory that she was never pregnant. she is performing 5 weeks after her c section?!?! impossible

Leave A Comment