Tom Cruise Rocks Out For The Cocks Out

Because OT VIIIs go method or go to the Zaptar Gamma and encase themselves in the failure chamber of Kermaxillon 7, here’s a shirtless Tom Cruise rehearsing for his role as Stacee Jaxx in Rock of Ages on his hotel balcony and then, based on the most logical explanation, pointing at the dude with the biggest erection and discreetly demanding he be Xenu rayed into a state of submission. On that note, check out Katie Holmes’ face as she steps out on the balcony to observe the aftermath. Either Miami still smells like Snooki, or Tom packed the grape EmotionGone 454 again. Katie Holmes hates grape!

Photos: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, Splash News