Tiger Woods makes Elin apologize to daughter’s school
Because this was entirely her fault, Elin Woods has cosigned a letter of apology to her daughter’s school for the increased paparazzi stemming from Tiger’s penis. Via E! News:
“We would like to share our appreciation for your support over the past several months and offer our personal apology for any inconvenience you are experiencing due to the increased media scrutiny surrounding our children. We truly understand how frustrating it can be.
“We hope that the paparazzi will find something better to do with their time in the near future. In the meantime, it is our goal to keep life as normal as possible for our children. We are sure that as parents you can appreciate that. For Sam, that normalcy means attending the school that she enjoys so much.”
The letter was signed by both Tiger and Elin which makes no fucking sense. It’s not like she was sitting around the house going “Hmm. Maybe I should stop my husband from having a bunch of explosive secret affairs I don’t know about before it upsets the PTA. — Eh, fuck it. I’ll just have a daiquiri.”