This Was Holding Adam Levine’s Unit

Adam Levine recently posed nude for Cosmopolitan UK, but with his man-parts conveniently covered up by the disembodied hand of his girlfriend, Sports Illustrated swimsuit model Anne Vyalitsyna-Iwasorderedinthemail. So here’s the two of them filming a Maroon 5 video in LA yesterday where they apparently have sex in a bed on top of a building or something. Because that’s realistic. Just once I’d like to see a music video where a guy gets laid behind a dumpster only to realize he’s drunk and it was a hobo the whole time. Tell that tale, Hollywood!

Also, pay me for my notes. I have tons of them and they’ll vouch for me behind the bowling alley. Just say “Crying Whisperwillow with Hands So Soft” sent you. — It’s a codename.

Photos: Splash News