These New Teen Moms Are Just Swell

January 24th, 2011 // 86 Comments

Here’s Jenelle Evans, star of the second season of MTV’s Teen Mom demonstrating how you top a previous season that involved Dom DeLuise getting his ass beat by Mama Fratelli and Adam Lambert’s aborted love-child that somehow survived: Baby explosions. Which is clearly better than my idea of making one of the baby’s gay. I’m talking hot pants and chaps gay, so who knows? Maybe season three.

Photos: INFdaily


  1. hmna

    On the other hand, they could make the problems go away with a single spark . . .

    • Facebook me

      Smoking while pumping gas..Just goes to show you the gas isn’t American and the chances are the owners of the station are not..

      • abe vigoda's eyebrows

        I can’t believe when I see people smoking at a gas station. I can’t believe anyone smokes at all after all we know about it, and what a disgusting habit it is.

        Too bad she was not the only one at the station, and it didn’t blow her to smithereens. That is what any schmuck who smokes in a gas station deserves.

    • s'up bitches

      100% with you on that one, as long as her kid is in the car, and lights up too. I’ve had it with these uneducated, irresponsible pig people shitting out kids all over the place, just so they can be a burden on society. Thin the herd.

    • Do some research

      Gasoline will not catch on fire via a cig. It requires a temperature that is higher than a cig can produce.

  2. Dave ain't here man

    No apostrophe, goddammit.

  3. “Teen mom” should feature the sterilization of these wastes of human tissue.

    • cc

      Georgio…agreed. This show was on at the gym and it featured this chick. The whole episode I was thinking who the hell is this mouthy, lazy, irresponsible bitch? And, apparently, she has become an even worse garbagebag since the show aired. Her son doesn’t stand a chance.

    • That,I would watch.

  4. The Beard

    Why do I always want to punch these people in the baby-maker…oh wait.

  5. Jenelle Evans Teen Mom
    Heinrich Himmler
    Commented on this photo:

    Teen Moms, the KA-BOOM special. Move that cigarette just a little closer to the gas tank and do the world a big favor.

  6. Jenelle Evans Teen Mom
    Commented on this photo:

    damn she is stupid!

  7. Heyzeus Hosay

    Wait…what happen to Travolta’s child post? Did Fish just grow a conscious and feel bad about talking smack about a baby?

  8. If MTV doesn’t win any awards for this show, there’s always hope that this one will win a Darwin.

  9. meow

    an apostrophe is not used to make something plural

  10. Jenelle Evans Teen Mom
    Joe J
    Commented on this photo:

    *crosses fingers*

    Come on Darwin. Prove all of those Christian fundamentalists wrong.

  11. Fear of a rough nation

    Oh boy, Wait till Kimmy K sees this latest teen transgression…

  12. Jenelle Evans Teen Mom
    Commented on this photo:

    is she seriously that fucking stupid?

    oops. she’s a teen mom… right… almost forgot.

  13. KK

    The teen mom’s WHAT are just swell?

  14. Caitlin

    I guess natural selection just isn’t a thing anymore..

    • What I’m starting to think is that God has decided to stop wasting his time on one-offs and is saving it up to wipe out the entire population of the earth in one fell swoop. Back when the ratio of stupid people to smart people was more reasonable, it made sense to deal with the exceptions.

      • cc

        That’s my theory exactly. He did a little spreadsheet, figured out that no matter how hard he worked he’d still fall behind, so now he’s creating a ‘big plan’. See you on the other side.

  15. Jenelle Evans Teen Mom
    Scootles Mcgee
    Commented on this photo:

    Ahhh, the floor of a gas station. Brings back memories of how she got where she is today!

  16. imapc

    If only there was a freak gasoline fight accident here …
    When a real-life person is dumber than Zoolander, that’s really really saying something…

  17. MightyD

    What a fucktard.

  18. Fear of a rough nation

    hahaha I fail to see she was smoking right in front of a gas pump…Nice!

  19. Barry

    Why does MTV have to make these idiots famous for doing stupid things?

  20. B

    Who would have imagined that the star of ‘Teen Mom’ would show such poor judgment?

    Oh. Right.

  21. Jenelle Evans Teen Mom
    Commented on this photo:

    Janeane Garofalo convinced someone to have sex with her?

  22. slappy magoo

    Who makes worse life decisions, the teen mom trying to look like Thora Birch in Ghost World? Or…Thora Birch, after Ghost World?

  23. Drew

    Who gives a shit? You’d never blow a gas station up by smoking near a pump. You could however (and the very reason you’re not supposed to) burn the hell out of yourself due to igniting the vapors, or getting it all over yourself… I say let her do it, for the sake of mankind of course.

  24. Jenelle Evans Teen Mom
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s a teen mom on a reality show. What did you expect? A fucking rocket scientist?

  25. Jenelle Evans Teen Mom
    Commented on this photo:

    At least she keeps the pump and the cigarette in different hands?

  26. Maeby

    she kinda looks like Ellen Page. only fatter and stupider.

  27. Compound9

    a guess a paycheck from MTV is what you get for being a dumbshit.

    Sex last a moment.
    Being a total dumbshit fucking retard last a lifetime.

  28. Is the big tall Adam’s family looking dude in the background supposed to be her boyfriend? I wonder how things are gonna workout between her and her mom and the custody thing…

  29. Jenelle Evans Teen Mom
    Commented on this photo:

    that’s smart….smoking while pumping gas. lol

  30. Jenelle Evans Teen Mom
    Commented on this photo:

    Teen Mom: Chlorinating the gene pool since 2009!

  31. Fun Fact: lighting gasoline vapors with a cigarette; very difficult. Lighting liquid gasoline with a cigarette, damn near impossible. You may as well be yelling about people talking on their cell phones at the pump.

    While I have no doubt that she is an idiot, there’s no need to go making a big deal out of nothing. I’m sure ample opportunities for ridicule will present themselves given time.

  32. aristotrash

    Holy crap, it’s Juno!

  33. Jenelle Evans Teen Mom
    Commented on this photo:

    Y’all are just HATERS! Her cigarette is done in her OTHER HAND, y’all! It ain’t dangermus!

    Sorry, Britney Spears just hacked my account.

  34. Fear of a rough nation

    I don’t think all the criticism are fair. Maybe shes thoughtful enough to fulfill the wishes of her enemies. How many of us can be so attuned….

  35. wonder if she’ll do the right thing and throw that cigerette on the floor there.

  36. Borderline retarded teenagers with babies. W. T. F?

  37. xerozs

    Way the go uneducated retard… smoke some more cigarettes at the gas station *hopes for a spark to blow up the lot*

  38. Spankee

    Wow you breed em smart for MTV

  39. Jenelle Evans Teen Mom
    Commented on this photo:

    Are you sure she is on Teen Mom? I think the MTV show she should have auditioned for is Jackass.

  40. Jenelle Evans Teen Mom
    Commented on this photo:

    the heels really dress up the trailer park outfit. classy.

  41. TomFrank

    Rats. Someone beat me to the “she looks like Ellen Page in Juno” comment. But I think that’s why they chose her.

    • I suspect she was chosen because she’s a big ol’ drama train wreck waiting to happen. Resembles Juno? A bonus, depending on how you look at things.

  42. Jenelle Evans Teen Mom
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘oh mah god. I’m so damaged, my parents split up and didn’t teach me about contraceptive. Oh mah god I’m so damaged look at my ratty hair and my square rimmed glasses. I don’t even need a prescription they’re just emo. Oh mah god I’m so damaged look at my negro zebra coat its so hipster. Oh mah god I’m so damaged I need to chain smoke to deal with mah terrible life.’
    btw your front left is under inflated.

  43. Elliott

    Wasn’t this bitch arrested for pot possession recently, too? She’s full of swell decisions. She’ll probably be picked up for hooking next, seeing as she’s not so good at keeping her legs closed.

  44. Jenelle Evans Teen Mom
    Commented on this photo:

    yup very smart. smoking while getting gas.

  45. Jenelle Evans Teen Mom
    Commented on this photo:

    nastiest creature to walk upright

  46. wim

    as long as there aren’t kids nor baby’s in the car…………..

  47. Jenelle Evans Teen Mom
    Commented on this photo:

    and this, kids, is why god actually invented abortions.

  48. wow Meg Griffin of Family Guy without her hat. wonder if Brian is the father of her baby.

  49. Wow she is looking like much beautiful. But she is standing at gas station with a cigarette in her hand. It is much dangers for her and gas station.

  50. Maximilian

    oh america,how low have you’re doomed..china will put the final nail in the coffin in few years economically..then that’s that..

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