The Most Important People on The Internet: Volume 30

June 4th, 2011 // 88 Comments

He needed this.

Welcome to the 30th installment of The Most Important People on The Internet where it should be slowly realizing it’s half-dead as random strands of gray hair hammer that point home. *pops a fistful of Xanax* Where was I and is there even a point to anything anymore? Oh, right, comments. Short gallery today thanks to a short week, but you’ll still find it loaded with hilarity and Aubrey O’Day’s terrifying hooch which you people somehow can’t get enough of. On that note, I’m now in the early stages of launching a cold cuts fetish site and will begin accepting savvy investors, but only if they have the balls to make 800 billion Internet dollars. (Current value = ~2 funny cat photos.)

Printing money,

- The Superficial

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Pacific Coast News

superficial

  1. Mel Gibson
    guy rossi
    Commented on this photo:

    “Now, how can I get a pack of N-’s to rape all the Jews? Think Mel, think……”

  2. the captain

    ..his head used to be a bowling ball, folks?

  3. Octomom Bikini
    Abby Normal
    Commented on this photo:

    Awesome!

  4. Alfonso Ribeiro
    herome
    Commented on this photo:

    carlton?

  5. Shauna Sand
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    They pitch it as a “scarless*” method to open up the chest & shove a bag of jiggle goo into the breast.
    *some nerve damage, scarring & numbness may occur

  6. Justin Bieber Dunking
    Abby Normal
    Commented on this photo:

    More like 3 feet closer to the ground.

  7. Aubrey O'Day Bikini
    Abby Normal
    Commented on this photo:

    Suddenly those Victorian age swimsuits seem like a remarkably good idea.

  8. Jessica Simpson Tony Romo Wedding
    wallfly
    Commented on this photo:

    said it all w his eyes

  9. Ainoah

    Oh wow Carlton, what happend?

  10. Justin Bieber Dunking
    wallfly
    Commented on this photo:

    ur 3 feet closer to the ground

  11. wallfly

    said it all w
    oh wait he totally didnt

  12. Mel Gibson
    sprub
    Commented on this photo:

    Surely, you’re joking

  13. Janice Dickinson
    ahole
    Commented on this photo:

    Courtney Cox in 2 years

  14. Mel Gibson
    john
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh crap! I thought I was taller!

  15. Alfonso Ribeiro
    Ellia
    Commented on this photo:

    How’s that funny?

    • Anna

      to understand most of the comments you probably need to know all of the shows and movies and the history of US entertainment. I don’t understand what’s funny about most of the comments either.

    • Jovy

      A polite way of saying “OOGA BOOGA WHERE THE WHITE WOMEN AT?!” you dunce.

  16. Audrina Patridge
    Jade
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s actually true. Never seen her looking better than here.

  17. Alfonso Ribeiro
    Scott
    Commented on this photo:

    Great to laugh out loud from the first one already. Ellia I guess you never saw Fresh Prince of Bel Aire

  18. Janice Dickinson
    SIN
    Commented on this photo:

    Lame comment.

  19. Shauna Sand
    Simole
    Commented on this photo:

    “They pitch it as a “scarless*” method to open up the chest & shove a bag of jiggle goo into the breast.
    *some nerve damage, scarring & numbness may occur”
    and also ridiculous comedy boobs are a possibility too.

  20. Tila Tequila
    SIN
    Commented on this photo:

    Yet another lame ass comment selected. WHAT RETARD IS CHOOSING THESE?

  21. Alfonso Ribeiro
    Sera
    Commented on this photo:

    He used to be slim :/

  22. Shauna Sand
    Urbanspaceman
    Commented on this photo:

    What’s with her face? JFC she has bad skin! Is she a steroid user?

  23. Audrina Patridge
    Urbanspaceman
    Commented on this photo:

    Sadly this is true. Maybe she has finally admitted to herself what everyone else knows.

  24. Geri Halliwell Bikini
    Urbanspaceman
    Commented on this photo:

    Love the granny swimsuit.

  25. Alfonso Ribeiro
    chev70
    Commented on this photo:

    He has barely changed over the years, I on the other hand…………

  26. Hugh Hefner
    Hugh Gentry
    Commented on this photo:

    that’s the best comment, “I love motorboating”? You suck.

  27. Shauna Sand
    Colin
    Commented on this photo:

    Where do you see a reattached nipple? Because to me it looks like it went: nipple off, Jell-O in, pepperoni on.

  28. Kim Kardashian Bikini Ass
    Meech
    Commented on this photo:

    Has anyone else noticed his freakishly long chin?

  29. Kendra Wilkinson
    The truth
    Commented on this photo:

    One thing in common with both of them is that they won’t matter to anyone in a few years.

  30. Venom

    Alfonso is the man.
    He has been making bank straight for over 30 years since before Silver Spoons.
    He is probably one of the most paid actors in Hollywood and he was banging Ashlynn Brooke, arguably one of the hottest pornstars ever.

  31. Aubrey O'Day Bikini
    RT
    Commented on this photo:

    I THREW UP IN MY MOUTH.

  32. Janice Dickinson
    Jovy
    Commented on this photo:

    Her flesh looks like it wants to rip itself off of her bones and run far, far away.

  33. Alfonso Ribeiro
    Dick Titty
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s not unusual to see me cry…

  34. Janice Dickinson
    Urbanspaceman
    Commented on this photo:

    Suzy Parker, (the real & genuine “first supermodel”), would have never appeared in public looking like this.

  35. Octomom Bikini
    Urbanspaceman
    Commented on this photo:

    In her own gruesome way she’s kinda hot.

  36. Aubrey O'Day Bikini
    Uncle Jemima
    Commented on this photo:

    You mean, Micha with two slabs of baloney hanging between her legs.

  37. Tila Tequila
    Ismoss
    Commented on this photo:

    Only funny one of the bunch.

  38. Belinda Novella

    Thank you for that, you left out Amy Lee.

  39. Kade Hudson Matt Bellamy
    Commented on this photo:

    +1

  40. Aubrey O'Day Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    i was looking for the ‘WELCOME HOME’ attached to her swimsuit. You know, for the soldiers.

  41. Aubrey O'Day Bikini
    Sexxxy Mami
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like a rectangle.

  42. Sean Kingston Jetski Crash
    kimmykimkim
    Commented on this photo:

    Ha! Awesome.

  43. Shauna Sand
    kimmykimkim
    Commented on this photo:

    Why did she even bother getting dressed?

  44. Tila Tequila
    kimmykimkim
    Commented on this photo:

    I love south park.

  45. Hugh Hefner
    Ruth
    Commented on this photo:

    Win!

  46. Kendra Wilkinson
    lemon
    Commented on this photo:

    This picture is so sad…

  47. Aubrey O'Day Bikini
    lemon
    Commented on this photo:

    She has reverse LeAnn Rimes “abs.”

  48. Mel Gibson
    M
    Commented on this photo:

    Is there an echo in here?

  49. Kim Kardashian Bikini Ass
    M
    Commented on this photo:

    Either he’s that strong or her ass was inflatable all the time…

  50. Justin Bieber Dunking
    M
    Commented on this photo:

    Guess white boys can’t jump either.

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