The Most Important People on The Internet

November 20th, 2010 // 51 Comments

First off, huge apologies for the site outage earlier today. I’m not going to point any fingers here, but it was entirely Ron’s fault for mistaking the server for Kate Gosselin last night. Haha! Office humor! It means absolutely nothing to you. Moving on.

Welcome to this week’s edition of The Most Important People on the Internet where your hatred for being exposed to Ke$ha’s haunches continued to manifest itself to the point where I’m amazed it’s not demanding sacrifices yet. That said, a special hats off to the appropriately named “Chunk” for being the first reader to point out that Teen Mom Amber Portwood looks exactly like Mama Fratelli from The Goonies. I’m honestly amazed people continued to comment after that. What else is there to say?

Anyway, enjoy.

- The Superficial

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Photo: Splash News


  1. Jessica Simpson
    Commented on this photo:

    The look on her face is similar to the look of satisfaction a dog gets when it scratches behind its ear, which is what I thought she was doing.

  2. Christina Aguilera
    Commented on this photo:

    The tranny hookers in Hollywood are getting uglier every year.

  3. RandaI

    Jessica you are a beautiful. Even though you’ve gone through traumatic times in the past several years, including your break-up from pop superstar Nick Lachey, your fans understand you and simply want more.

    You are a true inspiration to us all, even though you’ve gone from having a killer rock body to one resembling a baby narwhal. Keep eating and stay beautiful, Chubs.

  4. fester

    The comment about putting a bikini on a frog and making it stand up (Ke$ha) is the best of this batch.

  5. Jon

    Fat, dumb and crazy nice combo.

  6. Jessica Simpson
    Commented on this photo:


  7. FattyFatty2X4

    Fish, do you have a hard on for Mr. McPoop?
    That’s two weeks in a row.
    If you’re not careful he’ll take a run at you, wait….maybe that’s the idea.
    Best of luck.

  8. Lady Blah Blah

    Lohan dropped from Linda Lovelace project – did I miss that being mentioned here or was it not mentioned here? She should be put on suicide watch…

  9. ChinoLatino

    Jessica can be really stunning we all know this but only when she is stick thin, because any extra lb’s really show up miserably on her!

  10. H-ali


  11. Christina Aguilera
    Commented on this photo:

    Holy shit “mud butt” is right! It’s freakishly uncanny.

  12. Ke$ha
    Commented on this photo:

    so true

  13. Tinsley Mortimer
    Commented on this photo:

    Good call. I thought that comment belonged here when I read it too.

  14. Black Guy

    Damn fish, thanks for the most important people on the internet nod but can ya get a brotha’s comment straight?

  15. devilsrain

    No Paris Hilton painting walls? Youre slipping behind Yahoo

  16. Jessica Simpson
    Commented on this photo:

    that quote was from dlisted. not original!

  17. Sugar

    Jessica looks less intelligent than my 4 year old in that pic. It’s probably pretty close to reality.

  18. Grammar Nazi

    I don’t know if THERE (Not THEIR) is anything else to say….

    That is all :P

  19. The Situation
    Douche Boy
    Commented on this photo:

    John Travolta’s butt baby.

  20. Ke$ha
    Commented on this photo:

    I can’t stop laughing, that is EXACTLY what that looks like

  21. Jessica Simpson
    Captain Slappy
    Commented on this photo:

    I am quite certain she is receiving communication from the mother ship.
    I hope they type it REA..L…L…Y SLOW.

  22. Pat C

    Thanks for rooting through the cesspool of comments to pick out some gems.

  23. Yawn

    Was the site outage so that you could put up those repulsive adverts? What the fuck, I feel like I’m looking into Kaa’s eyes from the Jungle Book.

    WHHHHYYYY must every half decent website sell the shit out of itself??? There are such a thing as ads that DON’T dispense epileptic fits and shit about how my IP has been chosen for a TV prize (oh lucky me).


  24. Christ

    So… compare that “I’m mentally challenged” pose banner pic of chestica’s to any picture taken of smokin’ hot Vanessa Minello. I’d say Nick Lachey has moved up in the world, girl wise…

  25. Ke$ha
    Commented on this photo:

    perfect imagery, nothing like it!

  26. Tinsley Mortimer
    Commented on this photo:

    YES! I’ve really made it now

  27. Jessica Simpson
    Commented on this photo:


  28. Phil

    Wow, just look into those eyes……..yep, no one’s home!

  29. Ke$ha
    Commented on this photo:

    Makes me think of the frog from the WB. Damn funny.

  30. Jake Gyllenhaal Anne Hathaway
    Commented on this photo:

    No one else thinks she is strange looking?

  31. Christina Aguilera
    Commented on this photo:


  32. Cher
    Plastic Fantastic
    Commented on this photo:

    Cher can do no wrong as far as I’m concerned.

  33. richard

    I like to imagine that’s a gun she’s holding, not a pen.


  34. Jessica Simpson
    you ain't seen nutt'in Rough yet!
    Commented on this photo:

    One plus one is none! tee-hee I’m smatt!

  35. Natalie Portman
    Commented on this photo:

    flat and pancakey? Natalie Portman has no ass! Why cant anyone see that?

  36. wim

    psssst: we didn’t discuss dumb creatures!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  37. Wow

    What a desperate dumb fuck.

  38. Chris Brown
    Commented on this photo:

    Best comment of life, imo.

  39. Jake Gyllenhaal Anne Hathaway
    Commented on this photo:

    it’s her nose…… it looks like a chode.

  40. GravyLeg

    Thank you… Thank you… I will be here all week, Fish… :)

  41. Giggles

    Is it just me, or does she look like a complete idiot?

  42. Christina Aguilera
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like a blonde snookie. minus the spray tan..

  43. Jake Gyllenhaal Anne Hathaway
    Commented on this photo:

    no her nose is fine. it’s the mouth. and maybe eyes.
    if you see her in princess diaries before the “makeover” you will never be able to find her hot. she’s a nerd.

  44. Jake Gyllenhaal Anne Hathaway
    Commented on this photo:


  45. Christina Aguilera
    Commented on this photo:


  46. Christina Aguilera
    Commented on this photo:


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