The Crap We Missed – Wednesday 8.29.12

August 29th, 2012 // 501 Comments

Welcome to Wednesday’s The Crap We Missed where we find Brett Ratner struggling to understand why this Long John Silver’s app isn’t showing him porn, Pete Doherty continues living despite his best efforts otherwise, Mickey Rourke‘s spare parts utility belt seems to be overflowing, and we bear witness to the final horrifying moment in Kelly Clarkson‘s bassist’s life. If only he’d noticed the sign taped to the green room door stating clearly, ‘If you’ve been near a Dunkin’ Donuts in the past week, you MUST shower before soundcheck.’

Poor sonofabitch,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Paz Vega Butt Mom Jeans
    Commented on this photo:

    Her ass jumped the shark (into Mom butt)

  2. Yo-Yo Ma Paul Simon
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    You say potato, I say…I pooped my pants.

  3. David Walliams Tuxedo Lara Stone Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    How this guy ever landed Lara Stone I’ll never know!

  4. Kelly Clarkson Huge Butt Tight Jeans
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s trying to eat him

  5. Amanda Seyfried Picking Up Dog Poop
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Cleaning up after her last film.

  6. Samantha Ronson Duck Lips
    Commented on this photo:

    Why must she ALWAYS make a stupid looking face?

  7. Pete Doherty Sweaty Tophat Brown Teeth
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Ladies and gentlemen, I present the Meth Magician!!!

  8. Yo-Yo Ma Paul Simon
    USDA Prime McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    They are showing us what they did to that hooker.

  9. Kate Hudson Butt Tight Jeans
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Are they finally sending her out to sea, Eskimo style?

  10. Justin Bieber Big Fan
    Commented on this photo:

    Aww this poor girl isn’t asking for you to make fat jokes at her expense, but here they come…

  11. Brett Ratner Iphone
    USDA Prime McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    Greasy fingers don’t work worth shit on a touch screen.

  12. Amanda Seyfried Picking Up Dog Poop
    Matt Lauer
    Commented on this photo:

    You can’t tell from this photo but both the dog and the shit are stuffed.

  13. Brett Ratner Iphone
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Damned new technology! You just want to do one simple thing, like send a picture of your junk out to your production assistants, and it’s all “password this” and “login that.”

  14. Yo-Yo Ma Paul Simon
    Batman
    Commented on this photo:

    “…and then we lightly touched the tips of our penises together.”

  15. Yo-Yo Ma Paul Simon
    Commented on this photo:

    Jeez Paul, go outside ever once in a while

  16. Amanda Seyfried Picking Up Dog Poop
    taint necessarily so
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s an extremely rare photo angle in which we can’t see at least one of her eyes.

  17. Yo-Yo Ma Paul Simon
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    “And so Yo Yo says, they’re called finger cuffs. Put your finger in . . .”

  18. Pete Doherty Sweaty Tophat Brown Teeth
    Batman
    Commented on this photo:

    “Yes, Hello, I’m a douche.”

  19. Brett Ratner Iphone
    Commented on this photo:

    Shrimp platters – there’s an App for that

  20. Justin Bieber Big Fan
    USDA Prime McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    cash, money, bitches

  21. Amanda Seyfried Picking Up Dog Poop
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    “I hope nobody blames that on me.” The dog.

  22. Tori Spelling Pregnant Belly Sundress
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Welcome to the Boys & Girls Club of Burbank, serving the children of those impoverished souls who can’t afford the latest Mercedes model year.

  23. Tori Spelling Pregnant Belly Sundress
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey what happened to that table full of Lunchables we left out?!?”

  24. Kate Hudson Butt Tight Jeans
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    Wait, I thought that was Stodden, circa 1996.

  25. Blake Lively Cleavage Gossip Girl Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice bathroom tiles.

    • Hey, it’s a nice necklace! Plus if she catches you staring at her cleavage, you can always say, “Oh, I was just admiring your jewelry. Where did you get this?” And then she’ll think you’re gay and try to convert you. So you actually get laid for looking at her breasts—all thanks to that necklace.

    • Yeah, but all I keep thinking about is scrubbing bubbles.

  26. Josh Duhamel Backwards Hat Assistant Carrying Box
    USDA Prime McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    After a few years of Fergie, I’m sure that assistant and her “lady vagina” is looking pretty good.

  27. Pete Doherty Sweaty Tophat Brown Teeth
    taint necessarily so
    Commented on this photo:

    Genuine British high society.

  28. Amanda Seyfried Picking Up Dog Poop
    Josh
    Commented on this photo:

    Upon first glance at this picture I thought she was humping the dog.

  29. Anne Hathaway Adam Shulman
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s lovely

  30. Kate Hudson Butt Tight Jeans
    Batman
    Commented on this photo:

    Should’ve use the photo from ten seconds later when she falls off the dock and drowns after getting knocked unconscious by a gondola and the world becomes a better place.

  31. Mickey Rourke Receeding Hairline Sunglasses
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, he’s really got the make-up down for Burn Victim #3.

  32. Brett Ratner Iphone
    Commented on this photo:

    “Siri, What’s the closest shrimp cocktail sex parlor?”

  33. Katie Price Butt Spandex Pants Rock Climbing Wall
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    Sure, Katie. First time you’ve ever been bound up and stuck to a wall. We totally believe you.

  34. Justin Bieber Big Fan
    Josh
    Commented on this photo:

    “It’s simple, we eat the Bieber.”

  35. Amanda Seyfried Picking Up Dog Poop
    Commented on this photo:

    If I was a millionaire like her I would hire someone like me to pick up shit from a dog like hers.

  36. Anne Hathaway Adam Shulman
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    So, those dudes are all about the PDA, I guess. Whatever.

  37. Yo-Yo Ma Paul Simon
    Commented on this photo:

    “pooop…”

  38. Anne Hathaway Adam Shulman
    Josh
    Commented on this photo:

    Ya gotta wonder if he gets off on the fact that she looks like a 10 year old boy when he’s hittin’ it from behind.

  39. Tori Spelling Pregnant Belly Sundress
    Commented on this photo:

    “Your Honor, the witness is clearly lying. Anyone who claims Tori Spelling was ever even remotely attractive is a pathological liar.”

    “Here is Exhibit C. I rest my case.”

  40. Emma Roberts Bra See Through Shirt Legs Pale Skin Short Skirt
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    Turns out that with the right person in front of it a bright white van is painted “camouflage” color.

  41. Justin Bieber Big Fan
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Cut to 15 years from now: “Mommy, why is the guy from the car wash in a picture with you?”

    • To which will come the reply, “That’s not the guy from the car wash, that’s just some fat chick. And I’m your daddy, Justin Jr. D-a-d-d-y.”

  42. Kelly Clarkson Huge Butt Tight Jeans
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s performing with Midnight Oil?

  43. Mickey Rourke Receeding Hairline Sunglasses
    Commented on this photo:

    Red Skull had trouble fitting on his new skin-mask this morning.

  44. Tori Spelling Pregnant Belly Sundress
    The Most Interesting
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s what happened to my shower curtain!

  45. Anne Hathaway Adam Shulman
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m pretty sure Penn State isn’t going to be hiring this guy as a coach anytime soon.

  46. Brett Ratner Iphone
    Commented on this photo:

    “No no, little girl. I’m not at all taking a picture of you while bending over… I am uhmmm checking my email.. yeah, that’s it…”

  47. Pete Doherty Sweaty Tophat Brown Teeth
    Anthony
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s still alive?

  48. Justin Bieber Big Fan
    Commented on this photo:

    Is she his biggest fan?

  49. Kim Kardashian Wedding Gown Butt Twitter
    it had to be said
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah. Kanye seems the marrying type. Especially to a woman.

  50. Katie Price Butt Spandex Pants Rock Climbing Wall
    The Most Interesting
    Commented on this photo:

    “Not at all like my first pony ride…”

Leave A Comment