I might be taking this feature a tad too literally.
And now for that special time of the day where I pepper you in the face with celebrity photos I don’t want to write posts about. Ambition, I gots it. Here we go: Brooklyn Decker got a new haircut, but more importantly, what do her breasts think about it? They have feelings, too, you know. Reese Witherspoon is apparently going to turn into this, Joe Jonas isn’t even hiding it anymore and Kevin Federline will take one of everything, but use the Light Ranch.
Putting the shat in Shatner,
- The Superficial
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Photos: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News
Elin Nordegren?
Lol u stole my thunder, fish.. he def just Shatner’d himself
“I am crrrushing your nuts..”
win
This time it’s literally the “crap we missed”.
Shatner, looks like he just discovered they left the vodka out of his orange juice! Either that or he just shit his “Depends” full!
He def just shit hisself
“Captain’s log…”
LOL
It’s like “Faces of meth” meets AIDS Awareness Week.
yet more proof makeup is evil
“GAhhh AAAHHhhhhhhh. MY KNEES FEEL LIKE CRUSHED ROADKILL”
She looks lovely as a normal person. Never much cared for her before.
Damn thot it was lindsay. They look great~
Shite-ner.
With that look on his face, all I could think of was the theme music for the Wicked Witch of the West.
“How can bullshit walk?”
Holy shit, Kevin Spacey has to stop going to those pot shops in Cali….
Nicole Kidman… on steroids?
“howw fahhh must I ride dees thing before I can chill wiss a plate of food and a fat spliff??”
She needs to roll her Yoga mat so that it DOESN’T look like a giant dildo.
Scotty, I need an emergency transport on this bowel movement… Now would be a good time, Scotty… Scotty?
He’s dead, Jim.
Dammit Jim i’m a ghost, not a candy striper!
i heard he did dunk at least one
“See? I can play with balls of all sizes. There’s something I can do besides beat on Rihanna. Talk about that.”
Arguably the cutest babe on the face of the planet
Er, kinda looks like lots of other girls on the face of the planet actually.
“Just wrap it all..”
What…I’m 80 years old? oh shit…
“Whaddya mean you don’t do supersize here?”
She should not shop for clothes in the “Beyond” section. Oh wait, she’s dressed like Hilary Duff, so she must have shopped in the “Been” section.
” *psst* ….you. yeah you at the counter. did you look at my job application ye *COUGH*…UH, YES, I’LL HAVE A VEGGIE DELIGHT ON WHEAT PLEASE”
You sir, just put the AWE in AWESOME.
+1
“How the hell am I going to kill this one and get away with it?!”
Looks like a version of Melanie Griffith that I could keep a boner going for.
I thought she was pretty. hmph.
I’m amazed she let herself be shot sans fards.
Kathy Griffin is looking buff these days.
It’s an All Bran day, alright.
For a second I thought Val Kilmer had just given up altogether..
Oh my God, I was just coming here to say that same thing.
Actually, the real Val Kilmer might be fatter now.
She inherited the razor-chin-of-death from her mom.
Is the new movie a Phil Hartman bio-pic?
Stretchpants are not her friend. Stretch sweaters…maybe.
“Hi, I’m Eric Skarsgard, and this is a public service announcement.”
You mean, that was really penis soup? like human penis?
Wait, slow this down for a second. Brooklyn Decker has a face?
I’d do her in the bed, the bath AND the beyond (that’s the butt)
I’m not gonna lie…that haircut/scruff is kind of hot. I didn’t recognize him.
He must have heard Celine Dion’s going back to Vegas.
“So, Britney called me ‘trailer trash’? Did she mean it in a good way?”
…THIS is how close I am to punching you if you call me Ronald McDonald one more time.
She’s got the legs of a flamingo
William Shatner will hold his breath until you Name Your Own Price.
Wait, Reese Witherspoon’s dad is fat Jack Bauer?
So she got a Roomba and then fell asleep on the floor. Who hasn’t had to cut a robot out of their hair before?
Wow- hair does matter- Brooklyn Decker looks like Meg Ryan’s average plain looking daughter now… sad for all of those young-ish men out there shriveling up at tha visual. Quick run to your SI.
Does Reese Witherspoon know she’s adopted?
‘Round these parts we call that face the “buffet bullseye”.
Forget about Tom Hanks, how big is that fucking tree?!
That’s just Khloe Kardashian.
Win. I’ve got the giggles now.
Elton John’s really getting in shape.