The Crap We Missed – Wednesday 11.14.12

“Honey, would you cover up? Your lady penises are practically falling out of that thing.” – Ryan Seacrest

Welcome to Wednesday’s The Crap We Missed where it appears Gollum actually didn’t get too fucked up by the fires of Mount Doom after all, Jessica Simpson’s weight loss selfishly robs me of a joke for this Topher Grace pic, and even Tobey Maguire needs to get super high to stand being around Tobey Maguire.

“Hey Madonna, want to help ruin everybody’s evening?” – Me, just now, because my soul is black,

- Photo Boy

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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN