The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 9.3.13

September 3rd, 2013 // 565 Comments

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed that’s book-ended with Lady Gaga because when you take a three-day in this industry, you miss around 4,782 of her wardrobe changes, so I decided on the two either asscheekiest or nippliest. And even though I know neither of those are words, you still clicked on them, so that counts and fuck you Mrs. Rogers, my advanced comp teacher from high school, turns out butchering form and syntax can lead to a career. *calls Applebee’s, confirms they’re still holding application* Aside from Gaga’s amphibian nudity, we’ve got pregnant Jennifer Love Hewitt publicly carrying around her own pastries because clearly everyone she knows still hates her, Busy Philipps who could get by for another month if she could just sell this last bone density scanner, Amber Rose, new mom and role model to children everywhere, James Franco signing an autograph for Chunk “The Time-Travelling Awful Movie Fan” from The Goonies, and Jamie Foxx doing his warm-up stretches before handling the avalanche of cast-off vagina thrown his way by Channing Tatum.

There’s also Alyson Hannigan in a bikini and so help me God if one of you types the words ‘band camp’ in the comments, I’m turning this car around,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Lady Gaga Nipples See Through Bodysuit
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s really in uncharted waters as far as publicity seeking goes.

    • Think so? Because every now and then you see trailer trash shopping at Walmart in their underwear and i emphatically refuse to see any difference between that and what she’s doing here.

      • dunkydoo

        yes, but Walmart shopping don’t do it deliberately. they’re just too stupid to know better or think they are “cool”. Lady CaCa just reeks of desperation at this point. REEKS. all the plastic surgery in the world isn’t going to make her beautiful or madonna, which is what she ultimately wants.

    • Cecilia

      Not really sure what to think about her flaunting everything, this time around. I don’t get it. If she wants us all to see her completely naked, why not walk around naked? Why pretend to be all artsy and creative, when she’s really just a nudist with a record-deal. And it’s not like we’re all wondering what her nipples look like. I fell like I’ve seen her boobs more often than I’ve seen my own…

  2. Nicolas Cage Crazy Eyes Joe Premiere Deauville American Film Festival
    Pizzicat
    Commented on this photo:

    … Tesla hair?!

  3. Shemar Moore Holding Up Female Fan
    some black dude
    Commented on this photo:

    Ok why is Terell Owens in that wig and why is Shemar Moore carrying him?? I dont understand the world anymore…

  4. Lady Gaga Nipples See Through Bodysuit
    Commented on this photo:

    OH MY GOD! You can see Lady Gaga’s NIPPLES!!!!!

  5. Val Kilmer Full Mark Twain Makeup Citizen Twain One Man Show
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t think this has anything to do with Mark Twain.

    He’s obviously trying to get free chicken.

  6. Olivia Wilde Cleavage Naked Under Jacket Rush Premiere
    alex
    Commented on this photo:

    prognathic jaw.

  7. Val Kilmer Full Mark Twain Makeup Citizen Twain One Man Show
    Commented on this photo:

    Val Kilmer in “full Mark Twain makeup” or, as some people call it, a fake mustache.

  8. Jennifer Love Hewitt Carrying Two Cake Boxes Pregnant Belly Big Butt Tight Skirt
    Voice of Reisling
    Commented on this photo:

    Eating for two many.

  9. Lady Gaga Nipples See Through Bodysuit
    Hugh Jazz
    Commented on this photo:

    “Sorry lady, you’re going to have to pay for those raspberry danishes you are attempting to smuggle in your… blouse thingy.”

  10. Alyson Hannigan Bikini
    alex
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s right, you know Aly can still bring it! Hawt!

  11. Kelsey Grammer Kayte Walsh Making Out Behind Kevin Spacey US Open
    some black dude
    Commented on this photo:

    ” Oh my sweet. How I adore you. Atleast until youre 40 i do. Or until a younger hotter blonde comes along. but i do adore you. right now..”

  12. Elsa Pataky Nipples No Bra See Through Dress Chris Hemsworth Rush Premiere
    Pickle Nose
    Commented on this photo:

    She nice. Me like

  13. Olivia Wilde Cleavage Naked Under Jacket Rush Premiere
    Voice of Reisling
    Commented on this photo:

    Is Rush some sort of transvestite Rocky Dennis story?

  14. Val Kilmer Full Mark Twain Makeup Citizen Twain One Man Show
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    He does an encore as Einstein.

  15. Gerard Butler Surprised Look Talking On Cellphone
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s looking rather Crack-ish.

  16. Val Kilmer Full Mark Twain Makeup Citizen Twain One Man Show
    BP
    Commented on this photo:

    What about those fake teeth, oh those aren’t fake…..

  17. Michael Douglas Holding Giant Champagne Bottle Behind The Candelabra Premiere
    Brit
    Commented on this photo:

    “…and mark my words, you can also contract HPV from champagne when handled improperly, as I shall demonstrate

    • crb

      Win.

      -
      “Is there a vagina in here, too?”

      “No, that’s a-”

      “-YES THERE IS MR. ZETA-JONES! Dude, just let him have his fun, he’s like a hundred, okay?…”

  18. Michael Douglas Holding Giant Champagne Bottle Behind The Candelabra Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    True to his character, Douglas attempts to uncork the champagne “Liberace Style”

  19. Coco Cleavage Lingerie Body English Nightclub
    Brit
    Commented on this photo:

    major faux pas: Bringing a foreign body to a Body English function.

  20. Olivia Wilde Cleavage Naked Under Jacket Rush Premiere
    Pickle Nose
    Commented on this photo:

    Never really got on the bandwagon with her. That is one square jaw.

  21. Elsa Pataky Nipples No Bra See Through Dress Chris Hemsworth Rush Premiere
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Ooooh looks as though Miley and her prehensile tongue just weren’t enough for Chris.

  22. Val Kilmer Full Mark Twain Makeup Citizen Twain One Man Show
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    And I shall also be performing as Colonel Sanders at a KFC grand opening later tonight.

  23. Jim Caviezel Sitting With Gut Yawning US Open
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Dude, I said it was about this long, not as thick as a jar of mayonnaise. Get a grip.

  24. Kelsey Grammer Kayte Walsh Making Out Behind Kevin Spacey US Open
    Commented on this photo:

    “Ha! That was fun. Huh. I wonder what just made me think ‘American Beauty’ after all these years?”

  25. Jim Caviezel Sitting With Gut Yawning US Open
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like Jim is trying to explain why the U.S. Open is not boring as fuck.

  26. Jim Caviezel Sitting With Gut Yawning US Open
    BP
    Commented on this photo:

    Jesus, will you cover your fucking mouth…..

  27. Kelsey Grammer Kayte Walsh Making Out Behind Kevin Spacey US Open
    Brit
    Commented on this photo:

    Spacey, “ha…she still hasn’t figured out that Camille got all his money!”
    Kelsey “STFU, she loves me”
    Kayte “where’s the wallet?”

  28. Olivia Wilde Cleavage Naked Under Jacket Rush Premiere
    some black dude
    Commented on this photo:

    if her boyfriend comes out behind her dressed like Uncle Fester im going to lose it

  29. Gerard Butler Surprised Look Talking On Cellphone
    Voice of Reisling
    Commented on this photo:

    This photo has so many amazing comedic elements:
    1. Gerard Butler
    2. Background Juggalo
    3. Snubbed Sandler Clone
    4. Autographed Priority Mail
    5. Autograph that probably reads “sdhjfakjf dsjfhasdk”
    6. America Ferrara downing 32 ounces of Aquafina while looking on in admiration.
    7. Gerard Butler

    • cc

      ‘Autographed Priority Mail’

      You know your star is falling when the only person who really wants your autograph…

  30. Anthony Weiner 46th Annual West Indian Day Parade
    glam
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn. Dude looks like Freddy Krueger.

  31. Coco Cleavage Lingerie Body English Nightclub
    Pickle Nose
    Commented on this photo:

    Normally I have an irrational attraction to Coco, but for some reason this doesn’t do it for me.

  32. Shemar Moore Holding Up Female Fan
    BP
    Commented on this photo:

    So is Mr T’s real name Shemar Moore?

  33. Daniel Radcliffe John Krokidas On Pedestal 70th Venice International Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    “And if you stand up here, it’s like being five foot ten!”

  34. Shemar Moore Holding Up Female Fan
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    Martin Luther King got shot so that people could act like this.

  35. Anthony Weiner 46th Annual West Indian Day Parade
    Brit
    Commented on this photo:

    Danger is NOT my middle name

  36. Kelly Brook Cleavage Lingerie Instagram
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    The woman that renders most other women obsolete.

  37. Olivia Wilde Cleavage Naked Under Jacket Rush Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    What’s going on with her jaaaaaaaawwwhat was I talking about again?

  38. Kelsey Grammer Kayte Walsh Making Out Behind Kevin Spacey US Open
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    Whatever you do Kevin, DON’T TURN AROUND!!

  39. Beyonce Butt Booty Shorts Blue Ivy Getting On Yacht
    Voice of Reisling
    Commented on this photo:

    Those are ideal parenting shoes.

  40. Ali Lohan Cleavage Bra See Through Tank Top Skinny Jeans
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    She hasn’t eaten in 3 weeks, yet she still looks pretty good.

  41. Kelsey Grammer Kayte Walsh Making Out Behind Kevin Spacey US Open
    BP
    Commented on this photo:

    Spacey’s waiting for his kiss….from Frasier!

  42. Shemar Moore Holding Up Female Fan
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Judging by his arm position, not to mention her face, he’s holding her up by her vagina.

  43. Britney Spears Butt Sweatpants
    Voice of Reisling
    Commented on this photo:

    The Cradle-A-Ferret Workout is all the rage.

  44. Anthony Weiner 46th Annual West Indian Day Parade
    Commented on this photo:

    Whoa. I think I get why he only Tweets close-ups of his penis.

  45. Jennifer Love Hewitt Carrying Two Cake Boxes Pregnant Belly Big Butt Tight Skirt
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    If we’re playing “What’s in the box?” I’m going to guess “Body parts from a now-former fiance that kept foolishly trying to make a run for it.”

  46. Dakota Fanning Cleavage Night Moves Premiere 70th Venice International Film Festival
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    Mmm, look at that rack. If you squint, you can see it… it’s way in the back

  47. Anthony Weiner 46th Annual West Indian Day Parade
    some black dude
    Commented on this photo:

    “godDAMN my crotch itches. Great and I left that little crabs comb in the car.”

  48. Jennifer Love Hewitt Carrying Two Cake Boxes Pregnant Belly Big Butt Tight Skirt
    BP
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is she wearing the St Louis Cardinals World Series Flag on her ass?

  49. Michael Douglas Holding Giant Champagne Bottle Behind The Candelabra Premiere
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    See what I’m doing with my hand? Imagine it’s my tongue. This is sort of how I got throat cancer.

  50. Coco Cleavage Lingerie Body English Nightclub
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    You almost managed to negate the Kelly Brook photo…why would you do that?

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