Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed, which definitely skews heavier on the freak show portion than this thing usually does. Starting off is Bono not realizing there’s no hot dog vender at this kind of event (Because remember when he was shirtless and fat in that pic a few weeks ago? I’ll never forget. Ever.), followed by Meredith Vieira looking like she’s also been living in Amanda Bynes‘ car, and finally, Jake Gyllenhaal, who doesn’t always drink Dos Equis, but when he does, it’s through a penis-shaped straw.
Sorry again about the lack of random hotness today, but I left you an Easter egg, which if you feel makes absolutely no sense in the way of reconciling the absence of titties, welcome to your first day reading The Superficial,
- Photo Boy
Click Here To Start The Gallery
Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
Even he’s laughing at how over dressed he is for the beach.
This wasn’t that funny but I LOLed. Jeans and a long sleeve shirt at the beach IS funny!
“Where did I leave the baby? And why is my purse crying and wiggling?”
This!
Afro Samurai really let himself go
“Yo, hot dog man! Up here, Balcony 2A!”
I LOVE Robot Chicken!
“I’ve been urinating in these pants since 1973.”
My brain says “wrong hole” but their faces say “I’m game.”
Seig Heil !!
You’d make that face too if you had a leaky oyster.
S’up, bitches?
Seig . . . HEIL!
those are some XS small spanx
Bigger isn’t always better.
And it’s nice
You can smile all you want guys. I know that look from experience. No, they wouldn’t.
If you put your ear up to it, you can hear fat.
Laughed for FIVE minutes over that!
That awkward moment when you see someone ugly and realize it’s a mirror.
Dyslexic and color blind. Poor fucker.
Call me a Union Jackoff
“There’s no pie out here!”
Boobs.
How drunk do you have to be to get arrested for public intox in Nashville?
Too add on to that, how drunk does Shaun White have to be to get arrested for public intox in Nashville?
Apparently pull a fire alarm and be an idiot when the cops try to let you off with a misdemeanor:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/sports/olympics/shaun-white-charged-with-public-intox-vandalism-in-nashville-accused-of-breaking-hotel-phone/2012/09/17/ad8a8734-0127-11e2-bbf0-e33b4ee2f0e8_story.html
To add to that, how drunk ya gotta be to let a fence whup your ass (face, same thing with this tool)?
Not on;y that, but how drunk do you have to be to get busted for drunk driving twice in one day?
Answer: Incredibly fucked up. I think my BAC was .27!
Not pictured: that dude’s boner.
Oh it’s there He’s just Asian
Oh it’s there he’s just Asian and a huge homo!
ERMAHGERD, DONERTS!
Haaahahahahahahah
I don’t always bang country starlets, but when I do, I make sure they write a song about me when I kick ‘em to the curb.
Which one is which??
Not pictured, an employee screaming: ‘Hey! You left you’re baby in here! Come back!! It’s hungry and it’s eating the entire store, employees included!!’
Wha… ? This shot looks like a picture of a cardboard cutout taken from a less-than-optimum angle. Talk about your 2-dimensional characters.
Not commenting on the young lady, just the photo.
MILB
(“Mom I’d Like to Brain”)
Either I’m having a flashback or her head’s all wonky.
On her way to makeup and hair.
I just got through watching seasons 3 & 4 of True Blood and all I have to say about him is, he’s a sexy motherfucker. That show is full of them.
It looks like his right hand is skeletal.
When did Spock go gay?
When they cast Zachary Quinto.
Right after Sulu.
Myspace pic?
I suddenly want a happy meal
This picture needs more plaid.
Isn’t it nice. The Special School let the retards walk to the bus stop. Too bad they forgot their helmets.
LL Cool J thought bubble: “I’m gonna tear that brown ass up!”
Chris O’Donnell thought bubble: Oh God Damn it, I got sand in my shoe. CUT!
I wonder if Mr Hamm ever goes to the beach.
If so I hope the paps are there with their best camera equipment.
I want to see that puppy in the FLESH.
Bono: Hey, Prince Albert! Up here dude! How is it hanging?
Edge: Shut up, Bono! He might come over and I don’t want to take off my hat.
Bono (snickering): His name is Prince Albert…
It appears that Ms. Travolta may be executing both the gay-snap AND the gay-finger-wag in one fluid motion. Bravo!
See? There ARE little people who don’t pay taxes – The one percent
Black is slimming.
“That’s MISTER Helmet to you, pal!”
You had me at “I represent Queens she was raised outta Brooklyn”
All I have to do is take off my glasses and I have no problem with her. She still has the hot body.
He looks like a cancer patient
The guy behind him just found out that his wife had received her Christmas Hamm early.
I would like to thank her parents for fucking and allowing her to be born.
If the cops really wanted to have fun, they shouldn’t have given him a sobriety test, they should have given him the SAT.