The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 8.23.11

August 23rd, 2011 // 382 Comments

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed which you may notice is arriving several hours late because, Jesus Cristo, what a fucking afternoon. If the earth wasn’t rattling on the wrong coast thanks to Chick-Fil-A not being open on Sundays (I told them this would happen.), our network managed to have a frustrating number of meltdowns in the past 48 hours which was completely unrelated to the quake – Or soft breeze from a butterfly’s wing to you Californians. – but more importantly is entirely unacceptable to you guys, so huge apologies. We’ve got a crack team poking and prodding, yet no one’s trying my ideas because apparently computer servers lack sex organs. You got me.

Anyway, business as usual tomorrow – In theory. – and sorry again for the inconvenience. It’s been an asshole of a day.

- The Superficial

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

superficial

  1. Kirsten Dunst
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Is she out of the closet yet?

  2. East Coast Earthquake Damage
    Commented on this photo:

    Things just don’t add up in this picture. There are other shots on the internet that show this scene from a different angle, and I am convinced that it was an inside job. Chairs just do NOT fall over like that..

  3. Jack Osbourne Kelly Osbourne
    Commented on this photo:

    “Ummm, Kelly. We’ve discussed this many times before… not when there are cameras around!

  4. Jennifer Love Hewitt Animal Print
    Hugh Gentry
    Commented on this photo:

    if I wear baggy clothes, they won’t be able to tell I just ate a pallet of cake.

  5. Kristin Cavallari Tight Jeans Butt
    Hugh Gentry
    Commented on this photo:

    flabby ass nobody

  6. Kirsten Dunst
    Hugh Gentry
    Commented on this photo:

    she’s due back under the bridge anytime.

  7. Taylor Lautner
    Commented on this photo:

    Now that the 2 Taylors are apparently back together again, I’m gonna go out on a limb and guess that he isn’t the Swift one.

  8. Carla Gugino Cleavage
    Freddo
    Commented on this photo:

    Gotta admire the sly middle finger!

  9. East Coast Earthquake Damage
    Rough's sizemograph
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah we joke now but a few digits to the north there would have been a lot of ING’s going on. Like less typing, less laughing, but rather more consoling from crying and dying. Sorry couldn’t work roughing in there for some reason.

  10. Courtney Love Cleavage
    SSHGuru
    Commented on this photo:

    The Jokers Mother.

  11. Jessica Chastain Cleavage
    Freddo
    Commented on this photo:

    Inna gadda da vida baby…

  12. Justin Timberlake
    Commented on this photo:

    A sheepish Justin Timberlake arriving in the ER with his date for the evening after a rather unfortunate Krazy Glue mishap.

  13. Victoria Justice Bikini
    Ryan
    Commented on this photo:

    Why was this not given it’s own post?!?!?!

  14. Josh

    It was caused by Kim dancing at her wedding, just took a while to hit your coast.

  15. Victoria Justice Bikini
    Freddo
    Commented on this photo:

    Aaaaaahhhhh……Mmmmmmmmmmmm
    A fine way to end proceedings. Especially after the wookie fright.

    I have no idea who she is, but anyone who criticizes this chick is gay.

    • TomFrank

      Yes, thank you for this Final Five, especially after yesterday’s disaster. (J. Lo. Yesterday’s disaster was J. Lo.)

  16. forrest gump

    it was a true mess in america’s entertainment industry since Michael Jackson left us, folks!!

  17. Victoria Justice Bikini
    Rough's sizemograph
    Commented on this photo:

    Simple, distinctive but yet understated in its meaning.

  18. Jack Osbourne Kelly Osbourne
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    Dammit Kelly, just because we fuck at home does not make you my girlfriend.

  19. Bethenny Frankel
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    Ghostrider is a woman?

  20. Carla Gugino Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    That is one big-ass tampon string.

  21. Zoe Saldana Minidress
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    Delicious.

  22. Jack Osbourne Kelly Osbourne
    bbiowa
    Commented on this photo:

    And in every photo there’s Patton Oswalt saying it all with his eyes..

  23. Leelee Sobieski Cop Uniform
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, that is impressive that those fantastic tits show through that uniform.

  24. Courtney Love Cleavage
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    She has to have been dead for at least 5 years now.

  25. Taylor Lautner
    bbiowa
    Commented on this photo:

    And now… the easy lounge stylings of Joe Jonas….

  26. Victoria Justice Bikini
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    And Justice for all.

  27. Victoria Justice Bikini
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    Flawless.
    Nice booty.

  28. Vanessa Hudgens
    Commented on this photo:

    A victim of terrible plastic surgery, Vanessa Hudgens rushes back to her doctor with her nose in a cup after it fell off. Genius that she is though, she can’t figure out why her sunglasses won’t stay up.

  29. Victoria Justice Bikini
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    That is one beautiful Jay Z toe she has going on there.

  30. Victoria Justice Bikini
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    Like a motherfucking apple. Mmmm

  31. Alan Cumming
    Commented on this photo:

    In that outfit Alan is the only one Cumming.

  32. Bethenny Frankel
    Commented on this photo:

    I think she might have overdone it a little with her latest facelift.

  33. Zoe Saldana Minidress
    Commented on this photo:

    I admire his attempt at being a gentleman, but I’m pretty sure that’s not where you put your hand to help a woman out of a car.

  34. Bethenny Frankel
    bbiowa
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ve never seen a human with the neck of a Cardassian.

  35. East Coast Earthquake Damage
    whiskeyafternoon
    Commented on this photo:

    stupid muslim tectonic plates. we will never be safe again.

  36. Tom Selleck
    bbiowa
    Commented on this photo:

    The Monopoly Man’s dastardly evil twin.

  37. Phillip Seymour Hoffman
    Commented on this photo:

    Hay Phillip… I’m pretty sure that she’s not gonna call you back.

  38. Courtney Love Cleavage
    bbiowa
    Commented on this photo:

    Clearly a bad idea to get implants made of lead. Sure, it’s malleable, but….

  39. Chris Jericho Scarf
    bbiowa
    Commented on this photo:

    Hospital bracelet AND the scarf of desperation? How much sympathy does one guy need?

  40. Hmmm…not so much a crack team as a team on crack.

  41. Jack Osbourne Kelly Osbourne
    Maeby
    Commented on this photo:

    where did her bewbs go?

  42. Penn Badgley Immogen Poots
    Commented on this photo:

    “It was a Fusilli Jerry. I swear to god it was a million-to-one shot!”

  43. Justin Timberlake
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    Female Celebrity Boxes: He puts his junk in there.

  44. Alan Cumming
    Commented on this photo:

    “Mock me all you want, but it doubles my chances on a Saturday night.”

  45. Zoe Saldana Minidress
    holymoly
    Commented on this photo:

    apparently, she’s supposed to be a bad ass in “columbiana”.
    sorry, but bad ass and i could break you with a sneeze aren’t generally two things that go together. thin and fit is great – this is not htat.

    • AnnaDraconida

      My thoughts exactly… it’s laughable that male actors pack on tens of pounds of muscle to look convincing in a badass role, whereas all a woman has to do is to look fucking skinny. Thin does not = fit & strong, FFS. Starving yourself until you have no tits probably doesn’t take more self discipline than hitting the gym & toning up that musculature.

      • IBTC

        You do realize that you can’t tell your fat where to assimilate right? “Ok double cheeseburger, one patty per titty, let’s move!” Om nom nom.

  46. Jennifer Love Hewitt Animal Print
    J
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks just like Kim. Remember when she wore an outfit like that about a month ago?

  47. Tom Selleck
    holymoly
    Commented on this photo:

    when did tom selleck get a gay pirate’s mustache? before or after the rosie o’donnell interview?

  48. Carla Gugino Cleavage
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    So now it looks like everybody wants to go to Barbados

  49. Chris Jericho Scarf
    holymoly
    Commented on this photo:

    jon bonjovi apparenty parties with gadaffi’s less nice son.

  50. Kristin Cavallari Tight Jeans Butt
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    Is Jay Cutler really going to do better than this ?

Leave A Comment