The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 8.2.11

August 2nd, 2011 // 498 Comments

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed which has experienced a slight delay on account of Chrissy Teigen in her underwear and me frothing at the mouth over how in the year 2011 not educating kids is somehow a viable political position. I’m very professional. Long story short, Jasmine Waltz is in a bikini at the end, and she looks like a hotter, less crazy Megan Fox who apparently bangs dudes that look like David Arquette. (Okay, so maybe not completely less crazy.)

I’m a weaver of fantasy,

- The Superficial

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

superficial

  1. Mischa Barton
    Commented on this photo:

    Pick up or delivery?

  2. Mila Kunis
    yoyoblack
    Commented on this photo:

    too cute :)

  3. James Franco
    yoyoblack
    Commented on this photo:

    like dramatic chipmunk

  4. Mischa Barton
    Turd Ferguson
    Commented on this photo:

    What a Thriller.

  5. Pink
    Clicker happy, rough
    Commented on this photo:

    Again?

  6. Pink
    Commented on this photo:

    from Pink to Pig.

  7. fondler

    Looks like a young Sharon Stone, damn she was foxy as hell back then.

  8. Amber Heard Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    I find your lack of side-boob disturbing.

  9. Mila Kunis
    Commented on this photo:

    the face a million marines masturbated over.

  10. Yvonne Strahovski Zachary Levi
    AnnaDraconida
    Commented on this photo:

    “Where’d they go?”

  11. Dax Shepard
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    Why do I get the feeling that “All-Star Party” is somewhat of a misnomer?

  12. Dianna Agron Tight Dress
    eva
    Commented on this photo:

    such a beautiful girl!! She has a really pretty face!

  13. Charlize Theron See Through Shirt
    AnnaDraconida
    Commented on this photo:

    Now that guy is definitely straight.

  14. John Goodman Ken Jeong Chevy Chase
    Pip pip cheery-o
    Commented on this photo:

    Holy Fuck! I thought John Goodman was dead!

  15. Jasmine Waltz Bikini
    Clicker happy, rough
    Commented on this photo:

    You need to mention which celebrity shlong she serviced for me to know who she is. The name does sound familiar.

  16. Mischa Barton
    Clicker happy, rough
    Commented on this photo:

    Sargent slaughter?

  17. taz
    Commented on this photo:

    Maybe he’s pregnant now

  18. Shakira
    Commented on this photo:

    Peter Dinklage, Photographer at Lar…umm…small…

  19. Reese Witherspoon
    pdan
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hmm, that’s funny…it normally smells like strawberries when I fart, but this one has more of a dark cherry thing happening…”

  20. Dax Shepard
    Clicker happy, rough
    Commented on this photo:

    Dax? Dont let her dress you again.

  21. Shakira
    BlackMetalChocobo
    Commented on this photo:

    Mmmmmmpies

  22. somerandomchic

    That’s not a dress, it’s an excuse.

  23. Hugh Jackman Sunblock
    Commented on this photo:

    Wolverine 2 : Curse of the Pearl Necklace

  24. Jonah Hill Skinny
    pdan
    Commented on this photo:

    “What? The tie? Yeah, just picked it up at the Douche Depot over in Silver Lake.”

  25. Katy Perry Pink Hair
    pdan
    Commented on this photo:

    Smart water? I’ll say…

  26. Pink
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s my understanding that nursing a baby is thirsty work.

  27. Reese Witherspoon
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Preppie garb overdose.
    *barf*

  28. Courtney Love
    Jen
    Commented on this photo:

    You really can only polish a turd so much….its still a turd.

  29. Rashida Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks kind of like Jennifer Love Hewitt realizing that all she has to do to stop Christmas is to steal all the toys, trimmings and turkeys in whoville.

  30. Amber Heard Cleavage
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    I find her sexual orientation distressing…please, Amber, change even if it’s only pretend.

  31. Reese Witherspoon
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like a chin on a mission.

  32. Shakira
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, the yodelling stripper, haven’t seen her for a while.

  33. Pink
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Maroon

  34. Mischa Barton
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    WTF is on her feet?
    Goddamn, what a mess that outfit is. Yet she looks surprising clear eyed & the lipstick is on her mouth not her teeth. 50% success.

  35. Katy Perry Pink Hair
    yoyoblack
    Commented on this photo:

    no sir, i don’t like it

  36. Reese Witherspoon
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Give her points for not looking like a slob.

  37. Chris Pratt
    Commented on this photo:

    This reminds me… whatever happened to flesh colored beard guy and plastic girl? They dropped off face of the earth…

  38. Mischa Barton
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Heart.

  39. Shakira
    JesusCan'tHitACurveball
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d rather see Shakira in Lilliput than Jack Black.

  40. David Krumholtz
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Yes, honey, hold that finger up with pride…you’ve seen who you are marrying, haven’t you?

  41. Mila Kunis
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s Pippa!

  42. Commented on this photo:

    Baby! The other white meat!
    Baby! It’s what for dinner!
    I want my baby back baby back baby back..CHILLiiiisss baby back ribs!!!!
    (bbq sauce)

  43. Kate Moss Upskirt Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    I can almost see her moss.

  44. Courtney Love
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s sooooooooooooo close to looking just like Coco Chanel.

  45. Hugh Jackman Sunblock
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Would you like me to rub that sunblock lotion in for you?
    I do appreciate a man who takes care of his skin.
    It’s ok, I’m a Dr.

  46. Jason Lee
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Kiehls…looking at this guy I am assuming it’s an appetite suppressant?

  47. Hugh Jackman Sunblock
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ll get these glasses to stop sliding down my nose even if I have to use Elmer’s.

  48. Mischa Barton
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    I liked that jacket better on the guy on my bottle of gin.

  49. Rosie Huntington-Whiteley
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice summer look.

  50. Rosie Huntington-Whiteley
    Commented on this photo:

    I have a fishing lure just like those.

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