The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 6.28.11

June 28th, 2011 // 633 Comments

Suddenly I miss Nicole Eggert.

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed featuring Johnny Depp and Snooki go to the same nail salon, Joe Jonas fooling exactly no one, irrefutable proof that I hate you and Michael Lohan making sure Lindsay isn’t doing drugs in the shower. “She wants us to think she’s just washing her jugs. Now hide my erection with this cellphone clip.”

Look, I made it an entire post without saying angel rapedammit,

- The Superficial

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. “Nicole, what’s the most number of guys you’ve had in you at once?”

  2. Jersey Shore Deena Cortese
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh god, when will this end? First Milosevic, now this??

  3. Nicole Kidman
    Commented on this photo:

    The exact moment Nicole Kidman realized she used to be married to a gay oompa loompa…

  4. Joe Jonas
    Commented on this photo:

    You may ask yourself why he is able to smile while surrounded by 2 girls. I refer you to the tall guy behind him grabbing his ass….

  5. Betty White Feeding Giraffe
    Commented on this photo:

    “I was around when your kind still had short necks….”

  6. Alicia Keys Madame Tussaud's Wax Figure
    Nik
    Commented on this photo:

    Her wax figure looks white…

  7. Jersey Shore Snooki
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Snooki’s take on ‘the shocker’.

  8. Martin Sheen
    Commented on this photo:

    Everyone step back… Warlock senior is here,,,

  9. Alicia Keys Madame Tussaud's Wax Figure
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    She played Catwoman?

  10. Jersey Shore Snooki
    userofalltrades
    Commented on this photo:

    “This is how many dicks I can fit inside me at once.”

  11. Rosie-Huntington-Whiteley
    GuyLeDouche
    Commented on this photo:

    The clouds aren’t the only things that were puffy that day.

  12. Dr Robert Ray
    Nik
    Commented on this photo:

    DId he give himself breast implants?

  13. Nicole Kidman
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘Keith, what the hell are you doing in the duty free?!!’

  14. Tom Hardy
    Jon Hex
    Commented on this photo:

    “Do we really need Fast & the Furious 6?!”

  15. Tom Hardy
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s the same creepy smile he had after he shot that congress lady in the head.

  16. Betty White Feeding Giraffe
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    Will not say anything bad about BW. She’s good people.

  17. Lady Gaga MTV Video Music Aid Japan
    BlackAndWhiteMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    Saints alive, have you ever seen anything so shocking! I bet she buttons her knickerbockers ABOVE the knee.

  18. Janet Jackson
    Perverse
    Commented on this photo:

    God, fucking retire already

  19. Jersey Shore Deena Cortese
    Nik
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh gosh this is far worse than snooki.

  20. Betty White Feeding Giraffe
    Perverse
    Commented on this photo:

    God Bless Rose, the only GG left.

  21. Janet Jackson
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Screwface has two heads and four eyes!

  22. Rosie-Huntington-Whiteley
    Nik
    Commented on this photo:

    I honestly don’t see what’s attractive about this girl.

  23. Taraji P. Henson
    Perverse
    Commented on this photo:

    Next titty, 1 mile

  24. Lady Gaga MTV Video Music Aid Japan
    userofalltrades
    Commented on this photo:

    Notice she’s not wearing any ‘charity’ wristbands today.

  25. Madonna
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    The dog left a little something on the sidewalk there for you. I mean, it’s fucking Paris.

  26. Dr Robert Ray
    SSHGuru
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow! Ray Romano really bulked up.

  27. Johnny Depp
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s dressed for a part right? RIGHT?!

  28. Rosie-Huntington-Whiteley
    userofalltrades
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like someone has nailed some fried eggs to her body and then let gravity take over on the yolks.

  29. Michael Lohan
    Grace
    Commented on this photo:

    “From here, I can see the whole rooftop…”

  30. Janet Jackson
    peterman
    Commented on this photo:

    grumpy muppet

  31. Dr Robert Ray
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Sure, add him to the cast of Jersey Shore, why not.

  32. Michael Lohan
    SSHGuru
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey! I can see Lindsay naked from here!

  33. Alicia Keys Madame Tussaud's Wax Figure
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    they need to brown that thang up.

    also AK’s cute but she’s got unfortunate legs and boobs.

    • vitobonespur

      I don’t know shit about her hooters, but looking from this angle I kinda like her legs. She could crush my melon with those things. “Death, where is thy sting?”

  34. Tom Hardy
    Grace
    Commented on this photo:

    “Sloth loves Chunk”
    http://youtu.be/xbYZ2HT9pPk

  35. Janet Jackson
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    predator

  36. Dean Keaton

    Lead poisoning leads to mental retardation

  37. Joe Jonas
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Verily, they searched the lands, high and low, for the fairest maiden of all, yet the Jonas remained displeased.

  38. Taraji P. Henson
    baron of all media
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey Ahmad Rashad: Nice boobs!!!

  39. Amber Rose Wiz Khalifa BET Awards
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Shitty mummy outfit.

  40. Joe Jonas
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    left > right

  41. Ryan Phillippe
    Grace
    Commented on this photo:

    “What do you mean, ‘Shia LeBeouf is the biggest douchebag’?”

  42. Michael Lohan
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, using this and the ‘Blow’ app I can direct people right to her house.

  43. Tom Hardy
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    I hate this guys hats and shirts. He doesn’t even wear them himself.

  44. Alicia Keys Madame Tussaud's Wax Figure
    Commented on this photo:

    Those things look pretty lifelike…I’m guessing the white one is the wax, and the greasy one is the real one.

  45. Gwyneth Paltrow Beyonce Album Launch
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    I want to poop in her goop

  46. Gwyneth Paltrow Beyonce Album Launch
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey Gwyn, on a serious note, can you stab our husband in the vocal chords?

  47. Nicole Kidman
    Commented on this photo:

    You keep that dingo away from my baby!

  48. Betty White Feeding Giraffe
    baron of all media
    Commented on this photo:

    Ooooh! I know this one! What are two things I’d bang before I banged Snooki?!?! So? What do I win??

  49. Michael Emerson
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    He looks ‘Lost’.

    Oh c’mon I had to get it out of the way for the rest of you.

  50. Janet Jackson
    Commented on this photo:

    you gonna blame this one on wardrobe malfunction too? Eventually she has to take responsibility for the filth she’s subjecting the world to.

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