The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 11.26.13

November 26th, 2013 // 351 Comments

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed, which will probably be the last one until after Thanksgiving, so here’s my advice for dealing with your bullshit extended family on Native American Genocide Day. Anytime your uncle says “Obama” or “Obamacare,” you take a shot or chug the closest alcohol to you. (Yes, mouthwash and your aunt’s Gin & Fanta are both completely acceptable.) Anytime your grandfather starts a sentence with “Well, on Fox News they said,” you’re allowed to smash the porcelain gravy boat and stab him in the neck. Finally, if anyone brings up Breaking Bad, you immediately praise it as Jesus’ gift unto television and compare it to The Wire and/or The Sopranos. Or you could just bypass the whole meal and go shopping, because fuck retail employees. They aren’t even real people, amirite corporate America?!

Ok, holiday rant complete. Time for some links, let me see what I’ve got here. There’s the usual butts, blah blah, Ashley Greene dying in the street, yadda yadda The Pope‘s epic battle with Satan and HOLY SHIT, Aaron Carter‘s just making out with fans in the front row now.

That should hold you guys over,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Pope Francis Vladimir Putin
    AndySlash
    Commented on this photo:

    even the pope thinks dick in a box jokes never get old

  2. Aaron Carter Making Out With Fan In Front Row
    Commented on this photo:

    minutes later, she died of a disease modern medicine had never seen before.

    • dontkillthemessenger

      Well, they know Meth and they know herpes, so they’ll figure it out.

      What they don’t understand is why anyone is going to see Aaron Carter perform?

  3. Pope Francis Vladimir Putin
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Friar Tuck there in the background seems suspiciously smug about something.

  4. Aaron Carter Making Out With Fan In Front Row
    Commented on this photo:

    Hepatitus free with price of stage side admission.

  5. Ashley Greene Bloody Face Makeup Burying The Ex Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Did you get the license plate? Was it Lohan, Gayheart or Nick Hogan?

  6. Pope Francis Vladimir Putin
    Jade
    Commented on this photo:

    “Is he going to steal my cross? I hope he doesn’t steal it. I certainly am not going to give it to him.”

  7. Nicki Minaj Cleavage Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Seriously, how much longer do I have to wait to see her fully nude boobs?

  8. Nicollette Sheridan Having Makeup Applied The Christmas Spirit Premiere Empire State Building
    Commented on this photo:

    forget the makeup man, get a guy from an auto body shop.

  9. Prince Charles Dame Edna Royal Variety Performance
    Jade
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought it was November?

  10. David Duchovny Signing Young Girls Back LAX
    Commented on this photo:

    Well, that’s not bad for your age, but I definitely see the possibility of yuck-butt in your future.

  11. Joe Manganiello Short Hair
    Commented on this photo:

    ALLRIGHT! “All Dicks No Chicks volume 7!”

  12. Victoria Silvstedt Butt Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s the IHOP of prostitutes. Sorry, I don’t even know what that means, it just seemed to fit.

  13. Ashley Greene Bloody Face Makeup Burying The Ex Set
    Commented on this photo:

    That’ll teach her not to poke Courtney Love in the belly.

  14. Nicki Minaj Cleavage Instagram
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    I dub this… “Minaj Face”.
    Characterized by Dull, Glassy, lifeless, cow eyes denoting a lack of soul. Slightly relaxed lips indicative of recent drug ingestion. Focal point of photo on breasts to attract attention away from the vapid face. All slightly fuzzed with the instagram “self-important douche filter”.

  15. Sean Bean Drunk 41st International Emmy Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    He died shortly after….

  16. Prince Charles Dame Edna Royal Variety Performance
    Commented on this photo:

    A love of dress-up can bring kindred souls together…

  17. Sarah Silverman Cleavage Saban Community Clinic 37th Annual Dinner Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    huh, you can put lipstick on a pig. Nice titty illusion. Even I have a nice pair if I subject them to such excruciating upward pressure.

  18. Lady Gaga Butt Thong See Through Bodysuit Chateau Marmont
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    Sadly, the last remaining nude, rhinestone encrusted oxen of south Armenia was found poached today….

  19. Taryn Manning Dyed Blonde Hair 41st International Emmy Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Who let Paula Abdul into the Lazarus pit???

  20. David Duchovny Signing Young Girls Back LAX
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    “See, I told you Mulder, its that black goo shit from season 3. Can you call Scully now?”

  21. Victoria Silvstedt Butt Bikini
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Victoria was smart enough to understand that no matter how flat your ass is one set of implants is more than enough for anyone.
    The flat ass doesn’t appear to have slowed her business down at all.

  22. Ashley Greene Bloody Face Makeup Burying The Ex Set
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    We are so not that lucky.

  23. Taryn Manning Dyed Blonde Hair 41st International Emmy Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    that has GOT to be a guy. I’m not even kidding.

  24. Anthony Weiner Fingerless Gloves The River Fund New York Food Pantry
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like his wife finally slammed the laptop lid on his hand. Can’t imagine the condition of his dick.

  25. Joe Manganiello Short Hair
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    “Do the pictures pop up?”

  26. Jon Voight Grabbing Alexandra Fructuoso Wrist Children At Heart Gala Dinner And Celebrity Fantasy Auction
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    I wonder what its like having the last name of an ingredient in every can of soda on the planet.

  27. Busy Philipps Full Shopping Cart
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    No way… you shop at target too?

  28. Lady Gaga Butt Thong See Through Bodysuit Chateau Marmont
    nadsak
    Commented on this photo:

    Say what you want about her, she has the best bod around.

  29. Anthony Weiner Fingerless Gloves The River Fund New York Food Pantry
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Only 20+ years and approximately 30k hours of volunteer community service until we forget about the penis thing.
    Just kidding…we’re NEVER gonna forget about the penis thing.

  30. Sean Bean Drunk 41st International Emmy Awards
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    “And the winner for most death scenes in a single career…”

  31. Leilani Dowding Sports Bra Yoga Pants Equestrian Lift Blake Dahlgren
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    “I coulda pulled a cart in central park… fuck my life.”- The horse.

  32. Khloe Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Pants
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    Little Known Fact: The amount of fabric required for the ass of that pantsuit could have made temporary shelters for all the homeless in the United States.

  33. David Duchovny Signing Young Girls Back LAX
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    Roman Polanski mumbled something about this being how all his trouble started.

  34. Anthony Weiner Fingerless Gloves The River Fund New York Food Pantry
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    “Did he just try to show me a picture of his dick?”

  35. Zahia Dehar Butt Tight Skirt Fashion And Music Salute To Nelson Mandela
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks naughty.

  36. Ashley Greene Bloody Face Makeup Burying The Ex Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Twilight was bad but this is a little much.

  37. Aaron Carter Making Out With Fan In Front Row
    Commented on this photo:

    Twaught Hammer reunited?

  38. Sarah Silverman Cleavage Saban Community Clinic 37th Annual Dinner Gala
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks great.
    Then she speaks…. and its all downhill from there.

  39. Ashley Greene Bloody Face Makeup Burying The Ex Set
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    Hollywood is so racist… they can’t even find a black chick to play Rihanna.

  40. Ashley Greene Bloody Face Makeup Burying The Ex Set
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    She must have missed a spot washing Bay’s car

  41. Chris ODowd Crotch Grab 41st International Emmy Awards
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    Famous last words:
    If I shift it to the left quickly, they will never know.

  42. Pope Francis Vladimir Putin
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    Deed you hear da joke about da Pope and da gulag?

  43. David Duchovny Signing Young Girls Back LAX
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow Duchovny hasn’t aged at a – wait, this pic isn’t from 1985?

  44. Anthony Weiner Fingerless Gloves The River Fund New York Food Pantry
    Commented on this photo:

    Awright, you can getcher can uh soop over dere, yer stuffin on dat shelf, and dont ferget to grab a cock shot picher before youse leaves, k?

  45. Prince Charles Dame Edna Royal Variety Performance
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    “Reliving your Liberace days, I see…”

  46. Prince Charles Dame Edna Royal Variety Performance
    Commented on this photo:

    “Smashing hair, mother. You look 20 years younger.”

  47. Zahia Dehar Butt Tight Skirt Fashion And Music Salute To Nelson Mandela
    scrappyloo
    Commented on this photo:

    because Nelson Mandela was totally about fashion and music.

  48. Taryn Manning Dyed Blonde Hair 41st International Emmy Awards
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    The lips say come hither, but the eyebrows say Cro-Magnon.

  49. Ben Affleck Pissed Off Look Playing With Daughter
    Commented on this photo:

    Honey, nobody in this town looks at school artwork without a retainer.

  50. Prince Charles Dame Edna Royal Variety Performance
    glinny
    Commented on this photo:

    two old queens!

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