The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 4.19.11

April 19th, 2011 // 439 Comments

“I swear to God that better not be a Capri sale over there. I just got in the water!”

I honestly don’t feel right calling this The Crap We Missed considering The Shit We Scraped Out of This Hollow Shell of a Day is the more appropriate title, but I don’t like to swear in front of Andy Cohen. Anyway, Katherine Heigl is clearly trying to send me a message here even though she’s not walking in reverse. LeAnn Rimes and Brandi Glanville played nice presumably so LeAnn can carve off Brandi’s skin and make it into a coat. Ben Affleck is puttin’ this whole root canal in his reahview, and Orlando Bloom is the Jauntiest Little Biker who doesn’t deserve this.

Mel Gibson knows why Hollywood isn’t working today,

- The Superficial

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Photos: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

superficial

  1. Harry Dean Stanton
    KRAKKED
    Commented on this photo:

    Whoa its like Keith Richards’ twin, I wonder if they could be sent into the reactors in Japan to effectuate the repairs, as obviously they are impervious to death and death related symptoms.

  2. Harry Dean Stanton
    Pico Mornay
    Commented on this photo:

    He Looks Like Shit!!!

  3. Well at least you didn’t post the Kathy Griffin topless pic… So I forgive you.

  4. Katherine Heigl
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that outfit from when she worked at Sizzler?

  5. Katherine Heigl
    Commented on this photo:

    Buckskin skirt, pirate shirt, and a Texas-sized belt buckle…
    has got to be a fashion faux pas that would make a stylist chuckle

  6. Jennifer Hudson
    adolf hitler
    Commented on this photo:

    still not hot

  7. Jessie J
    adolf hitler
    Commented on this photo:

    letting off some steam

  8. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Goes that necklace come with sour cream and guacamole?”

  9. Scott Ian
    eatme
    Commented on this photo:

    looking more like a Rosenfeld every day

  10. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    Commented on this photo:

    Noooo! Spelling fail. I lose.

  11. Harry Dean Stanton
    Commented on this photo:

    Old man is old.

  12. Ben Affleck
    Commented on this photo:

    This is what fucking Jimmy Kimmel will do to you.

  13. Andy Cohen
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Should I be hot n bothered by this piece of barechested manliness?
    Because I’m not.

  14. Katherine Heigl
    Crabby Old Guy
    Commented on this photo:

    Giddy up!

  15. Katherine Heigl
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    The message this outfit sends is that she likes to do it reverse cowgirl style.
    While twirling a lasso.

  16. Andy Cohen
    freebie
    Commented on this photo:

    I have no idea who this is but I like looking at him.

  17. LeAnn Rimes Brandi Glanville
    Commented on this photo:

    Note to self: if you’re going to leave your wife for your mistress, she’d better be a fucking upgrade.

  18. Kaitlin Olson Rob McElhenney
    Commented on this photo:

    Unless it’s an “Always Sunny” quote, there is absolutely no reason whatsoever to make fun of this couple. Great show, great actors, low key, and cute baby…oh wait, I just saw the headphones. Are you fucking kidding me?

    • MarkM

      Ha, ha, ha…I was going to make a funny joke about the headphones…but I’m pretty sure those are just a set of noise cancellation headsets…maybe whereever they were going was going to be to loud for the youngster’s ears!

  19. Chuck Liddell
    Sarah
    Commented on this photo:

    Ew.

  20. Harry Dean Stanton
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like this “Torpedo of Truth” tour schedule is really catching up to Sheen.

  21. Andy Cohen
    Commented on this photo:

    I have no idea who this is, and somehow I feel proud of that fact.

  22. Melanie Griffith
    freebie
    Commented on this photo:

    Past her prime.

  23. Scott Ian
    Commented on this photo:

    There’s something on your chin.

  24. Harry Dean Stanton
    Commented on this photo:

    Ouch.

  25. Jennifer Hudson
    freebie
    Commented on this photo:

    Wonder what her real hair looks like?

  26. Melanie Griffith
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s some classy shit right there.

  27. Chuck Liddell
    Commented on this photo:

    So, basically, if you work for an LA photo agency and you don’t accept the owner’s invite to his “private” birthday party, you’re gonna be tailing Chuck Liddell with a 24mm lens.

  28. Ben Affleck
    freebie
    Commented on this photo:

    Looking tired and old

  29. Sofia Vergara
    Commented on this photo:

    Either her last name should be Viagra or Viagra should change its name to Vergara.

  30. Jennifer Hudson
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    You’re so fat Jennifer.

    Maybe you should lose some weight or something. Like 80 pounds.

  31. Chuck Liddell
    Michelle
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey look a new look for Chuck – consciousness.

  32. Brittany Snow
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    yeah, you’re scraping…

    • Fletch

      I think it took a little more than scraping in this instance. He had to scrape the bottom of the barrel until he got to the ground. Still finding nothing, he had to dig 30 feet under just to find this.

  33. Harry Dean Stanton
    Commented on this photo:

    This is his Halloween costume, he’s going as a M*A*S*H* reject.

  34. Katherine Heigl
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like a page out of a 1994 Sears catalog.

  35. Jennifer Hudson
    Commented on this photo:

    I hope her dress was supposed to look like treadmarks.

  36. Harry Dean Stanton
    Commented on this photo:

    Is it some kind of a law that actors have to wear a scarf?

  37. Melanie Griffith
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone better fetch that bucket of mackerel; it’s feeding time.

  38. Ben Affleck
    Commented on this photo:

    He looks like he is about to cry. Or shit himself. Or both.

  39. Melanie Griffith
    Commented on this photo:

    How do you know when your career is done? When the paps don’t follow you and you have to take pics of yourself with your cell phone hoping someone will care.

  40. Scott Ian
    Commented on this photo:

    So THAT’S what happened to Evan Rachel Wood’s merkin.

  41. Jennifer Hudson
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like she took lessons from Brittney with the nipple pointing at the ground.

  42. Harry Dean Stanton
    UnholyKrep
    Commented on this photo:

    Dang, that Tiger blood has a scorchingly short half life, don’t it?

  43. Melanie Griffith
    Commented on this photo:

    All that was missing before was a giant $35.00 tattoo. Now she’s perfect.

  44. Scott Ian
    slim
    Commented on this photo:

    it looks like he swallowed a squirrel whole and it’s tail is hanging out of his mouth

  45. Brittany Snow
    Commented on this photo:

    “Is Vanessa really not going to share any of that X with us?!”

  46. Jennifer Hudson
    Commented on this photo:

    I get it. You’re skinny now.

  47. Scott Ian
    Ponkur
    Commented on this photo:

    You err…. you got something on your… oh no nothing, forget I said anything. Looking good brah!

  48. Orlando Bloom
    Commented on this photo:

    There must be circus music playing in his head. It’s the only explanation for that face.

  49. Ben Affleck
    Commented on this photo:

    Huh? I gotta put it where now??!?

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