The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 4.19.11

“I swear to God that better not be a Capri sale over there. I just got in the water!”

I honestly don’t feel right calling this The Crap We Missed considering The Shit We Scraped Out of This Hollow Shell of a Day is the more appropriate title, but I don’t like to swear in front of Andy Cohen. Anyway, Katherine Heigl is clearly trying to send me a message here even though she’s not walking in reverse. LeAnn Rimes and Brandi Glanville played nice presumably so LeAnn can carve off Brandi’s skin and make it into a coat. Ben Affleck is puttin’ this whole root canal in his reahview, and Orlando Bloom is the Jauntiest Little Biker who doesn’t deserve this.

Mel Gibson knows why Hollywood isn’t working today,

- The Superficial

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Photos: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News