The Crap We Missed – Thursday 8.18.11

August 18th, 2011 // 350 Comments

“If Tom says this is Suri, then this is Suri. Hello, Suri, how are you today? What’s that? Daddy’s re-educating the real you? Hahaha! Silly goose.”

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed featuring Halle Berry about to break her foot off in the paparazzi’s ass (If you notice she’s not wearing the proper footwear, you’re doing it wrong.), how I want from my coffee from now on and Blake Lively confusing me for a rearview mirror which happens way often than you’d think. I’m very reflective.

Is Akon officially white now? Can we get a ruling on that?

- The Superficial

The Crap We Missed

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Katie Holmes
    Commented on this photo:

    I think its safe to say that she has finally snapped into full blown bat-shit.

  2. LRonHoover

    Her tits look like they’re bolted on.. even that small.

    • MeGoo

      That is the standard construction of the K-T-Bot 5000. It’s newest features are the ability to show a faint hint of emotion while still not being able to think for herself due to the latest Ingram blocking chip. Those Body Thetans will no longer be able to pester her with such things as logic because of the upgrade in her CPU containing the logic-lockout function.

  3. Jeremy Piven
    Commented on this photo:

    I look at this picture and all I see is “Duhh”

  4. Akon Segway
    Number 2
    Commented on this photo:

    He just lost all street cred, permanently. He could stomp a guy to death for his Air Jordans and still not get it back.

    • Hilarious*! Totally thinking the same thing. In Beijing some of the Chinese employees @ fancy hotels use those things to hail taxis for guests~ hehe

  5. Akon Segway
    Commented on this photo:

    I am kinda disappointed. I expected it to be rolling on 24′s.

  6. Salma Hayek Wig
    KC
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone’s been to Cher’s hand-me-down wig store!

  7. Jeremy Piven
    Commented on this photo:

    “OK, Jeremy, last time. Make two bunny ears, then one bunny goes around the….oh, looks like i lost you again. Sorry bro.”

  8. Bar Refaeli Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    DYI Abortion Kit

    Step 1 : Sucker punch

  9. Katie Price
    SIN
    Commented on this photo:

    hy suck a thumb when you have those big ole titties to suck on? Oh, that just what WE want to do…

  10. Akon Segway
    Commented on this photo:

    I wonder if he recently got his auto tuned?

  11. Katie Price
    Commented on this photo:

    Obviously that kid is missing sucking on those. I feel your pain.

  12. Jude Law Scruffy Beard
    Noah
    Commented on this photo:

    Haters gon’ hate.

  13. David Arquette
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    and there was Davey “Two Times”, who said everything twice, like, “I’m gonna go get the papers, get the papers”.

  14. Crystal Harris Jordon McGraw
    SIN
    Commented on this photo:

    and I didn’t have to fondle a withered dick to get a ride this time.

  15. Akon Segway
    Noah
    Commented on this photo:

    This is begging for Photoshopped spinners.

  16. Katie Holmes
    catapostrophe
    Commented on this photo:

    I hope she’s constantly counting down the days till the end of her contract.

  17. Blake Lively Nipples No Bra
    PoorMaryKelly
    Commented on this photo:

    My god that’s the sharpest tit I’ve ever seen!

  18. Halle Berry Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    She is doing the “WTF!” warning….I would be very careful after this.
    I suspect this bitch knows how to swing a tire iron.

  19. Katie Holmes
    TomFrank
    Commented on this photo:

    “All right, Internet, you win. A doll with real hair for my Suri. No more painted-on hair dolls for her!”

  20. Prince Harry
    catapostrophe
    Commented on this photo:

    Ralph Malph.

  21. Christopher Mintz-Plasse
    Commented on this photo:

    Holy shit, is this one of those Celebrity mash up things that Conan does? Lemme guess! Anne Hathaway plus Matthew Broderick?

  22. Halle Berry Cleavage
    SIN
    Commented on this photo:

    Even when she is pisses at the papparazzi, those tits still look great.

  23. Imogen Thomas Tight Dress
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    Sure I’ll take a picture with you, Ginger Tupac.

  24. Jude Law Scruffy Beard
    Commented on this photo:

    Did he loose everything in the riots?

  25. Bar Refaeli Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    If I were ever fortunate enough to brush against her, I would need the jaws of life to get my boxers off later that night.

  26. Lacey Schwimmer Kyle Massey
    Commented on this photo:

    It almost looks like his knees are giving out.

  27. Imogen Thomas Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    Ma’am you seem to have a stowaway cat who is trying to escape….

  28. Imogen Thomas Tight Dress
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    You sure this isn’t in Barbados ?

  29. Cat Deely Samsung Galaxy
    Commented on this photo:

    I would pull a Samsung Galaxy out of her asshole and lick it clean.

  30. Jennifer Morrison Butt Tight Jeans
    SIN
    Commented on this photo:

    OH MY GOD!!!

  31. Katie Holmes
    Cam
    Commented on this photo:

    “I know Tom said she was getting shy around the paparazzi but it’s so strange for Suri not to talk to me.”

  32. Akon Segway
    PoorMaryKelly
    Commented on this photo:

    He must be craving some attention. Jennifer Love Hewitt is probably making calls right now and she’ll be riding one up and down a busy thoroughfare before sundown.

  33. Jennifer Morrison Butt Tight Jeans
    SIN
    Commented on this photo:

    Since Hilary Duff will start to lose her figure, we have a new great looking ass to follow.

  34. Jeremy Piven
    Tracey
    Commented on this photo:

    Look! Look! I think they know who I am!

  35. Salma Hayek Wig
    PoorMaryKelly
    Commented on this photo:

    OMG! Where’s her boobs?

  36. Imogen Thomas Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    Adam is clearly covering a raging hard-on.

    I myself would proudly present it to her with a bow on it.

  37. Katie Holmes
    Commented on this photo:

    Pretending to be part of the new baby birthing trend, Katie finally steps off the deep end.

  38. Jeremy Piven
    Commented on this photo:

    too much face

  39. Jennifer Morrison Butt Tight Jeans
    crazypants
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, who knew she had that going on under her doctor’s coat?

  40. Prince Harry
    Tracey
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah, I still have hair. Cherrio!

  41. Halle Berry Cleavage
    Cookie
    Commented on this photo:

    Maybe she’s getting Depardieu-ed.

  42. Akon Segway
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice to see somebody use the little purse that comes in a box of Tampons.

  43. Prince Harry
    PoorMaryKelly
    Commented on this photo:

    I love Ginger Prince!

  44. Prince Harry
    Satan's bitch
    Commented on this photo:

    “Who’s a naughty boy? That’s me. I’m a naughty boy.”

  45. Reese Witherspoon
    TomFrank
    Commented on this photo:

    “Masters of Hawaiian Slack Key Guitar Volume 2.” I’d be impressed if I didn’t suspect that it came in a gift bag.

  46. Prince Harry
    Commented on this photo:

    Why should I give a fuck about this turd?

  47. Prince Harry
    meeker
    Commented on this photo:

    See that hairline? Any more questions on who’s my daddy?

  48. Reese Witherspoon
    Commented on this photo:

    How cute. Somebody still buys CD’s.

  49. Akon Segway
    Drew
    Commented on this photo:

    Photoshopped. We all know black people don’t ride Segways.

  50. Halle Berry Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    award winning side boobage.

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