The Crap We Missed – Thursday 5.16.13

May 16th, 2013 // 379 Comments

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed, coming at you slightly early so Fish and I can duck out to see Star Trek Into Darkness, which may or may not result in a review depending on how severely we slapfight over manly stuff like editing and dialogue. But that doesn’t mean I slacked on your TCWM. There’s Jason Collins‘ twin brother, who’s apparently had to beat off gay dudes left and right, wait, Jonah Hill spotting a produce truck, The Pope fondling a bird, and Sacha Baron Cohen finally inspired for his newest character, Juan Carlos, a narcoleptic Mexican gardener, who through various cross-cultural mishaps will be unable to keep his penis from constantly flopping out of his shorts. It’s going to be hilarious, bro!

See? I took care of you guys, *glues Spock ears to crotch, Vulcan salutes mirror*,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Jude Law
    Commented on this photo:

    “How am I going to get out without the world seeing my cunt?” or “How’s the best way to get out to show the world my cunt?”

  2. Jackie Chan Balancing On Yacht Railing Skiptrace Photocall Cannes
    Vlad
    Commented on this photo:

    And now Jackie Chan for Dr. Scholls…

  3. David Hasselhoff Hayley Roberts 66th Cannes Film Festival Opening Ceremony
    Commented on this photo:

    We’re done, and I see a fucking White Castle right across the street.. Let’s roll!

  4. Anna Faris CBS Upfronts
    Commented on this photo:

    Angry Faris is Angry.

  5. Vanessa Paradis Huge Gap In Teeth
    Vlad
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess Johnny Depp got tired of always driving through the Chunnel

  6. Prince Charles Wedgwood Institute
    Commented on this photo:

    “Let me show you how that guy we paid off drove through that tunnel in Paris.”

  7. Will Smith Jaden Smith Ellen DeGeneres Green Screen Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    “How much for him? How much for the little boy?”

  8. Will Smith Jaden Smith Ellen DeGeneres Green Screen Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh, and it totally looks like Will is poppin a boner.

  9.   Sara Gilbert Sharon Osbourne Aisha Tyler Sheryl Underwood CBS Upfronts
    Commented on this photo:

    They were playing Crazy Train, right? If not, they should’ve been.

  10. Prince Charles Wedgwood Institute
    Vlad
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s not what I meant when I said “give it the gas.”

  11. Prince Charles Wedgwood Institute
    Commented on this photo:

    “By God, that is just going to be as messy as it sounded..”

  12. Prince Harry Sentebale Royal Salute Polo Cup
    Commented on this photo:

    “Your deodorant has failed you!”

  13. Jude Law
    Commented on this photo:

    The Fonz has really let himself go. Heyyyyy.

  14. Jarron Collins Im The Straight One Shirt Jason Collins Brother Jimmy Kimmel Live
    Commented on this photo:

    It just adds fuel to fire that all blacks look alike. Which isn’t true. Which is why I knew he wasn’t his brother. Which is why I wonder why he needs to wear the shirt.

  15. Jarron Collins Im The Straight One Shirt Jason Collins Brother Jimmy Kimmel Live
    Commented on this photo:

    uh huh… sure.

  16. Billy Baldwin Grey Beard Licking Lips
    Commented on this photo:

    Does he make that face when he is just about to beat the crap out of you?

  17. Jonah Hill Fat Weight Gain
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn, Leo!

  18. Carey Mulligan Leonardo DiCaprio 66th Cannes Film Festival Opening Ceremony
    Commented on this photo:

    Leo (Satan): I’ll give you anything you want — for a price.
    Carey: Will you marry me?
    Leo: No.

  19. Jonah Hill Fat Weight Gain
    Commented on this photo:

    Still a funny guy. For a short while.

  20. Rob Kardashian Fat Weight Spandex Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Never make fun of a pregnant man.

  21. Pope Francis Holding Dove Vatican City
    Commented on this photo:

    I must be sick. To me it’s a cool picture. I’ll call 911 right away.

  22. Sebastian Bach Maxim Hot 100 Party
    Commented on this photo:

    Which one’s the girl?

  23. Vanessa Paradis Huge Gap In Teeth
    Commented on this photo:

    Depp dumped this???

  24. Khloe Kardashian Butt Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought Op-Art was dead…

  25. Jude Law
    Commented on this photo:

    “Eww. I just HATE spiders!”

  26. Pope Francis Holding Dove Vatican City
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Poop on a Pope.

  27. Sacha Baron Cohen 66th Cannes Film Festival Opening Ceremony
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s a giant! He towers above all beings! I will worship him and his dwarfish minions…

  28. Kelsey Grammer Kayte Walsh Bra See Through Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    Just make him stop marrying and having kids he’ll never see to adulthood.

  29.   Sara Gilbert Sharon Osbourne Aisha Tyler Sheryl Underwood CBS Upfronts
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    So Aisha Tyler is asian now?

  30. Carey Mulligan Leonardo DiCaprio 66th Cannes Film Festival Opening Ceremony
    MeanMrsMustard
    Commented on this photo:

    Alright Alright.That’s what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age.

  31. Jonah Hill Fat Weight Gain
    Commented on this photo:

    “SALAD!”

  32. Mena Suvari Butt Tight Jeans Versus Versace Launch
    Commented on this photo:

    God DAMN!

  33. Khloe Kardashian Butt Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    If you stare directly at it and scroll up and down, it bounces…

  34. Anna Faris CBS Upfronts
    Commented on this photo:

    Britney looks like shit

  35. Cindy Crawford Cleavage 66th Cannes Film Festival Opening Ceremony
    Commented on this photo:

    She resembles Maria Shriver.

  36. Emma Watson Nipples The Bling Ring Premiere Cannes
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s like a small bird is trying to fly out of her shirt.

  37. Billy Baldwin Grey Beard Licking Lips
    Commented on this photo:

    Billy hungry! Billy see food!

  38. Billy Baldwin Grey Beard Licking Lips
    spit&lick
    Commented on this photo:

    Pulling his tongue back in after using it to give himself a major cowlick

  39. Sebastian Bach Maxim Hot 100 Party
    Ripley's Believe It Or Not
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s now more famous for being in Trailer Park Boys, and she’s got a real looking decent pair of tits. Maxim going out on a limb to get anyone w/some kind of profile to attend their spread.

  40. Vanessa Paradis Huge Gap In Teeth
    Ripley's Believe It Or Not
    Commented on this photo:

    When the Germans were retreating through the Falaise Gap in France in ’44, God how they would’ve loved it to have been that wide. Their casualties would’ve been so much less.

  41. Christina Aguilera Cleavage Bra Midriff Facebook
    Commented on this photo:

    Photoshop, surgery, whatever. She looks very sexy. Great pic.

  42. Jarron Collins Im The Straight One Shirt Jason Collins Brother Jimmy Kimmel Live
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ll bet he bought that t-shirt from Kanye West, since Kanye can’t wear it.

  43. Emma Watson Nipples The Bling Ring Premiere Cannes
    Commented on this photo:

    There’s no way she looks like a 12 year old boy cuz I’ve never wondered what it would be like to fuck a 12 year old boy.

  44. Billy Baldwin Grey Beard Licking Lips
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s his standard greeting to attractive women he meets.

  45. Carey Mulligan Leonardo DiCaprio 66th Cannes Film Festival Opening Ceremony
    Commented on this photo:

    My god, how the mighty have fallen…

  46. Rob Kardashian Fat Weight Spandex Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Did he convert to Mexican?

  47. Stephanie Seymour Nipples Sentebale Royal Salute Polo Cup
    Commented on this photo:

    Not only is that dress ugly as sin, powder blue doesn’t seem to be a god color for her. That’s two strikes and no balls.

  48. Pope Francis Holding Dove Vatican City
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey, Giorgio, there’s more of these things over there. Do you know how to clean and cook ‘em?”

  49.   Sara Gilbert Sharon Osbourne Aisha Tyler Sheryl Underwood CBS Upfronts
    Commented on this photo:

    I wonder if the rest of that woman looks as good as her thigh does. One can always hope.

  50. Hulk Hogan TNA Impact Wrestling Welcome Event
    Commented on this photo:

    “You’re trying to tell me that having sex with your own daughter is illegal? But why? She’s over 18.”

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