Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed featuring Katy Perry making up for her retro-Candyland whatever-the-fuck outfit, Charlie Sheen either taking a fist to the mouth like it’s a breeze against his cheek or licking the coke off a man’s finger and Sylvester Stallone after pumping Dana Carvey full of HGH and discovering Vladimir Klitschkno has a twin brother which is literally the only possible explanation for that photo. “No, no, dey’re too beautiful. Turn da cameras off! TURN ‘EM OFF! Dana do da Church Lady.”
Isn’t that special?
- The Superficial
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Photos: Fame, Flynet, Getty, GQ.com, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
…is it that time already ?
gone ?
Rich people who are fat should be killed.
Have your personal chef make you some low-fat fucking twinkies, bitch
Kelly Clarkson = The definition of Lower Body Obesity!
Lower body? I think she is the poster child for just plain ole’ obesity.
When Kelly won American Idol, and was featured in People Magazine, she was quoted as saying “I won’t starve to be a star.” Someone needs to tell her that not only is she absolutely in no danger of starving, but there is a significant difference between not starving, and being obese
If Sandusky were a Hollywood star, he would have been overseas by now protected by all those delusional fucks like this turd.
Thank you
+100
I swear to god that’s what I was about to say. this is so fucked up it’s not even funny.
Maybe. so far, he has been protected by Penn’s delusional fucks right in good ol US of A
It’s like that T-Mobile commercial with the singing pink clad elves. What….am I the only one that hears “Walking in an Orgy Wonderland”?
No, it’s universal. T-Mobile is now selling Orgies.
That’s all I hear in that commercial. Orgy, orgy, orgy. Thank god, I thought I was a total perv for a second there.
Grand Theft Autotune
They accepting an award for setting celebrity faux-lesbian kisses back 20 years? Yikes!
“Okay, so, as soon as she comes out of the house, you proposition me…I hope she’s wearing one of those bandage dresses.”
Why is she sad? Is it because it took that much photoshop to make her look bangable? I bet that’s it..
When I saw the facial expression I thought for a second it was Sam Ronson wearing a wig.
Bless you, you little child sodomizer you…
He needs a hand up AND a hand out.
The music video must be a remake of her prior song, now titled “Miss Independent of Dietary Restrictions”.
Fall so hard! That sh*t cray.
Best. Comment. Ever.
Damn, I wish I would have been there to catch her.
“Your breath smells like a seal’s dick”
“Yours smells like a heroin needle”
Sweatin’ to an oldie.
Nice!
“Charlie! Charlie! I have a new goddess! Tell me what my finger smells like!”
don’t you mean, “Tell me WHO my finger smells like” ?
i said GOD DAMN!
“Okay, baby. Let me just drink ten more of these and I’ll be good to go.”
ahahahah
Funny line, TF, but if you’d left out the words Let & me, it’d topped the hilarious scale.
So the fat kid from Stand By Me now looks like a model and she looks like this…
….and they BOTH have twins!
“Oh come on!!! I just wanted to borrow one! Is that so wrong??”
Now that she’s no longer pregnant, he’ll have to finish in her ass – twice.
I never thought I’d have to visualize what it would look like if someone inflated Hillary Duff…
Must not be very famous; she has no shoes and is taking a cab
She plays the lead in The Hunger Games. Give it 6 months and you’ll know who she is.
Great, first they let a porn star read to kids and now Shazaam. I’ll be in my bunker…
Will Ferrell +10
3 dicks and 1 pussy. this is going to get messy!
WHAT IN BLOODY HELL DO YOU MEAN I CAN’T TOUCH MYSELF????!??!?!?!
THAT’S WHAT I DO!!!!!!!!
“I called another contractor who never returned my call. I then called Jack Black Roofing who returned my call immediately. Being a widow I have to place all my trust in whoever does work for me. I recommend Jack Black Roofing to anyone in need!”
+1000
Looks more like Jennifer Love Hewitt back on her diet.
I see London, I see France…..
no clue who this chick is…..
nice cans
American Idol chick.
Is this supposed to turn anyone on ?. Anyone ?
Looks like charlie is back on the booze and drugs. YAY !
I have the funniest boner right now.
Like the rest of the public, Jerry still has moments when he is shocked to discover that yes, he does get to bang Rebecca Romijn.
He’s still a huge step up from Stamos.
Wow Kelly Clarkson’s midget impersonator is spot on.
Dinklage is jerking off after that comment.
She has midget ass! LOL
“This is terrible. All the other famwhores are depleting the supply of famous married men to bang.”
Cut, cut. I can’t go on. Where the hell is the fucking food truck already ?
“My career… Have you seen it? Anyone?”
MILF DOWN !
MILF DOWN !
“Bro of the Year?” WTF. Oh, and what a stupid pose.
He’s on pace to become the next Harry Dean Stanton.
So they all fucked Hayden Panettiere, right?
It’s a fat girl’s name.
Yep, she pushed maximum density by the wayside and just went with total beached whale.
Imagine overcoming a life time fear of flying and then looking up in the departure lounge and seeing Our Lady
aye dios mio!
*Grabs Rosary Beads* HAIL, HOLY QUEEN, Mother of Mercy, our life, our sweetness, a Brazilian supermodel!!!!
I heard they were casting for a role here. Is this the Motel 6 ? What’s this movie about ? Anybody know what’s going on ? This is the movie test, right ? I’m not too late, right ? I really need this !
Actually, he’s dead. It’s like Weekend at Bernie’s. Those people are just moving him around.
So in other words, he hasn’t moved in a week?
well, I’ll give them credit for the “least gay Bro of the year”, but that’s about it.
I always thought she’d be wild in the sack.