The Crap We Missed – Monday 1.28.13

January 28th, 2013 // 453 Comments

Welcome to another post awards-ceremony-packed-weekend edition of The Crap We Missed, which of course means it will include anyone who looked confusingly hot and weird at the same time, awesomely inappropriately groped someone and/or something, or just showed up with his top bitch. As for those not invited to the fancy awards shows, we’ve got Leonardo DiCaprio demonstrating how supermodel vagina gives you mutant abilities, Denzel Washington totally fucking up at oogling the Laker girls’ asses, and Miranda Kerr inventing the optical illusion boner.

It’s like one of those 3-D paintings, only if you stare hard enough at her, instead of seeing an object, Orlando Bloom dies in a fire,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Leonardo DiCaprio Juggling Ice Ball Jack Daniels Ad
    Commented on this photo:

    Jack Daniels sells silicone implants?

  2. JWoww Cleavage Sports Bra Abs Instagram
    guttboy
    Commented on this photo:

    Breaking news…..JWoww is still a nasty scunt.

  3. Dick Van Dyke Fondling SAG Awards Statue
    Commented on this photo:

    “Dick” Van “Dyke” cupping the balls of a statue? No joke required.

  4. Miley Cyrus Cleavage Cosmo Cover
    Commented on this photo:

    “Awesome Bonus Covers” For after you’ve messed up the first one!

  5. Brooke Shields Fake Teeth Garden of Laughs Comedy Benefit
    papastryfe
    Commented on this photo:

    Apparently Hilary Clinton impersonations were all the rage that night

  6. Alec Baldwin Hilaria Thomas
    Commented on this photo:

    Guess who’s pussy whipped.

  7. Miley Cyrus Cleavage Cosmo Cover
    USDA Prime McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    Never faked anything? That’s right, Billy Ray, you know how to please a lady.

  8. Russell Simmons Hana Nitsche 24th Annual Producers Guild Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    ok, it’s time to quit with the hat you fucking dipshit. fucking poser.

  9. Dick Van Dyke Fondling SAG Awards Statue
    Commented on this photo:

    “Your honor. This is where Sally Rogers kept touching me!”

  10. Sarah Hyland Cleavage Sofia Vergara SAG Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Yes, even statues want to touch her boobs!

  11. Miley Cyrus Cleavage Cosmo Cover
    Commented on this photo:

    I can’t wait to see her in 2018′s version of The Canyons:
    Miley Cyrus as you’ve no doubt seen her, plays the legendary and now dead Lindsey Lohan…

  12. Maggie Q Naked Body Paint Peta Ad
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn it! I don’t know enough about geography to make a proper joke here!

    Curse you public schools!

  13. Brooke Shields Fake Teeth Garden of Laughs Comedy Benefit
    Commented on this photo:

    Now if she could just put something in front of the rest of her face!

  14. JWoww Cleavage Sports Bra Abs Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Those pink dumbbells come in a set of 4, where are the other 2… Oh.. Never mind…

  15. Jessica Alba Cleavage 24th Annual Producers Guild Awards
    SIN
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow. One hot mama

  16. Amanda Seyfried 24th Annual Producers Guild Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Very nice dress choice… Really accentuates her personality…

  17. Jessica Alba Cleavage 24th Annual Producers Guild Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Dayummm…

  18. Miley Cyrus Cleavage Cosmo Cover
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s Photoshop, B*tches…

  19. Jaden Smith Stupid Clothes Justin Bieber Concert
    cuddles
    Commented on this photo:

    Usher said he wanted to see me? RUN!!!

  20. JWoww Cleavage Sports Bra Abs Instagram
    diego
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice Kate Gosselin stomach… did she recently give birth to 8 kids?

  21. Denzel Washington Lakers Game
    Commented on this photo:

    He could narrate a gay porno and it would all of a sudden sound hetero…

  22. Arnold Schwarzenegger Putting On Leather Gloves
    Commented on this photo:

    “Your cloths, give dem to me”

  23. Nabilla Benattia Cleavage Legs Tight Ripped Minidress
    Commented on this photo:

    Thank god for sluts.

  24. Kaley Cuoco Cleavage Huge Bangs SAG Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Now I believe she would date a nerd.

  25. Kaley Cuoco Cleavage Huge Bangs SAG Awards
    jessica
    Commented on this photo:

    No. Hell no.

  26. Amanda Seyfried 24th Annual Producers Guild Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Even her boobs are mounted on the side

  27. Nabilla Benattia Cleavage Legs Tight Ripped Minidress
    Commented on this photo:

    Nothing like starting your shift early

  28. JWoww Cleavage Sports Bra Abs Instagram
    contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s not helping.

  29. Miranda Kerr Legs Minidress
    Commented on this photo:

    Check-mate!

  30. Steven Tyler Scarf No Shirt Under Vest
    Commented on this photo:

    I think at his age, it would be okay if he toned it down…just a little bit.

  31. Russell Simmons Hana Nitsche 24th Annual Producers Guild Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    A sad day when Russel has run out of money and has to resort to drugging his “companions”…

  32. Claudia Romani Butt Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Bless you child…

  33. Maria Menounos Butt 2nd Annual Australian Academy Cinema Television Arts Awards
    Bruce
    Commented on this photo:

    Crikey, she’s a bit of alright, eh mates?

  34. Elizabeth Berkley
    Commented on this photo:

    Ah, how sweet, she’s a mom now. Oh and…MOOOOOOO!

  35. Amanda Seyfried 24th Annual Producers Guild Awards
    contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is there always someone off and over to the left that everyone is looking at during these photo shoots?

  36. Ben Affleck Jennifer Garner Butt Grab 24th Annual Producers Guild Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Is she even wearing underwear? I don’t think that’s a grope; I think that’s coverage.

  37. Miley Cyrus Cleavage Cosmo Cover
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Please if there is a god those type of padded shoulders will never come back into style.

  38. Alec Baldwin Hilaria Thomas
    contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice hair don’t.

  39. Julia Stiles Moon Face Cleavage SAG Awards
    diego
    Commented on this photo:

    Scissor me timbers! That is one pissed off lesbian!

  40. Christina Milian Nipple Slip Wardrobe Malfunction Swimsuit
    BobDobalina
    Commented on this photo:

    I spy with my little eye something that is…NIPPPPPLE

  41. Kim Kardashian Fluffy Feather Skirt
    Commented on this photo:

    Meow? no thats not right. Woof? nope, thats not it. Oh yeah…MOOOOOOOO!

  42. Sarah Hyland Cleavage Sofia Vergara SAG Awards
    contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Is Sofia Vergara in a new Chipmunks movie?

  43. Cameron Diaz Tired Hood Up Covering Face
    GG
    Commented on this photo:

    Time is a bitch.

  44. Jessica Alba Cleavage 24th Annual Producers Guild Awards
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    Good god! 0_0

  45. Sarah Hyland Cleavage Sofia Vergara SAG Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    “Move award down so it doesn’t block my boobs…oh, who am I kidding. As long as I’m next to her, no one’ll be looking at my boobs.”

  46. Maggie Q Naked Body Paint Peta Ad
    contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like the tip of Central America would be a nice place to vacation this year.

  47. Kim Kardashian Fluffy Feather Skirt
    Commented on this photo:

    A guy in a red ski-mask, you say? No, didn’t see him.

  48. Jessica Alba Cleavage 24th Annual Producers Guild Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Wrong lipstick, but I wouldn’t change anything else.

  49. Jessenia Vice Cleavage Minidress Smoking Hooka
    B&WMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    Hookah alert!

  50. Johnny Galecki Kelli Garner Cleavag SAG Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    “I can’t tell from this angle—is she smiling? She is? Sigh…”

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