“No captain, she said she won’t board until we change it to S.S. Buttsex.”
Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed where Sara Jean Underwood absolutely owns Adrianne Curry at Comic-Con, Mick Jagger answers approximately how many more farewell tours The Stones are planning, and Elizabeth Berkley just remembered she forgot something. Probably left the stove on. And exactly how much can a fart smell like man-goo?
Only Edward Cullen knows the answer,
- Photo Boy
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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
One of these guys is about 5 seconds away from an impromptu yoga demonstration. Can you guess which?
Showing us her Bermuda Triangle. Did a bunch of planes really get lost in there?
What does dressing up like Shakira in her ‘Whenever, Wherever’ video have to do with comics?
I think I just got an Attack of the Show in my pants.
Look! 2 no talent hacks!
Rachel Bilson’s okay. But Hayden really screwed the pooch in everything outside of Star Wars.
wow she is telling people how much of her fame is left.
please tell me he’s not wearing baby blue clogs….with heels!
Spanish men all have a little peacock in them (they really put up a squawk going in).
They’re EUROPEAN MAN SANDALS, gringos! ;)
If we brood long enough, they’ll mistake it for talent.
Monkey-Boy and Smelly were the star duo of the day!
He looks shockingly like the Emperor.
I was gonna say he is looking like dad after the helmet comes off.
LOL! “I find your lack of faith Disturbing!”
…The same way I got every other role…with this hand.
Virtuous European manhood once again protects its own against the Mongol housekeeper horde!
Break out the rum & the big feathered headpiece…RiRi is back in Barbardos.
Dude: “Antonio, I hear you wank in airport bathrooms with old yoga magazines…”
Antonio: “*sigh* Yeah, you’ve seen my wife. Got any more recent issues lying around?”
They have sun in San Diego. Maybe you could fucking sit in it for a couple of minutes.
She will be tan for her next role to suit you melanoma sun worshipping addicts.
She’s looking great here.
agree
She’s been coming along in her hotness level, and she is looking good here.
agree. i dont like KS’s personality AT ALL but she is pretty and her skin is lovely. i dont get this countrys obsession with being tan. good luck to all these bitches who will look like tan mom and have skin cancer when they are 40 and age themselves 2 decades
great = unwashed
Vitamin D is good for you. Sparky didn’t say “hey, go all Jersey Shore funk nasty on us!” He/she said that Kristen should get some fucking sun.
Getting some sun is not the same as frying your skin or spray tanning it orange.
I agree with sparky. Just a little for a natural glow, and for the sake of resembling someone who gets out of the house to do stuff.
Maybe that is her natural glow…
Or maybe it’s the glow from sitting indoors and smoking stuff all day.
I’m not saying she isn’t pretty– she is.
I’m just kinda sick of the extremes. “I’m supposed to be pale”. No. Get out of the freaking house, or go for a walk during your lunch hour, and watch the magic that wil unfold on your cheeks…
The skin tells many many tales about one’s health and level of productivity.
And don’t get me wrong– I also hate the orange extremists… because they’re just fucking ugly.
Thanks.
Guess what, I don’t tan at all. I just burn I burn, I turn red, it goes away and I’m pale again. NOT EVERYBODY TANS.
I’m very pale and I don’t tan easily. if I go out to ‘get some sun’ purely for the vitamin D or the sake of being outdoors, it still doesn’t really show
Yeah, well, go out during the day more than once a week.
I’m pale, too. I know what I’m talking about.
Thing is, a lot of us never leave our office buildings.
Her skin tone is perfect for the lead in “50 Shades of Grey”.
most people usually tip the valets with a few bucks not let them jerk off to her.
Ha Ha Ha!!!!
his tip was getting to see her National Geographic nipples
Somewhere there is a publicist just giddy that her cash cow FINALLY smiled and showed off her tits.
Still won’t lose the slouch. That’s a terrible way to treat a set of tits.
Just need to ask…do tits actually come in sets? I thought since there are (usually and preferably) only two of them that they came in pairs…
And just like that, I like her now.
Hey Will.i.am, you want to go to the horse races?
“Sure, let me dress like a complete fucking moron first. I do believe I’ll put on my douchiest pants in preparation for tonight’s revelries!”
If you squint, it looks like they are holding hands.
Is that the transsexual one?
No, that’s the Medium one….
OMG bizarre. In the hour I lost this morning clicking various links to various sites I came upon “dial-a-star” and you can call the transsexual one for $20.00 a minute. I shit you not. (God I had to backtrack through my history to find out how I found it…)
One of us should call and post the “transcript”
Get it?
One of “us” being you of course.
Scratch that, make that $10/minute. A bargain.
You’re the most literate sex spam bot we’ve read here. :)
She looks like someone that could make you a nice quilt.
Or embroider a dress for Patricia Arquette…
She’s in Katherine Heigl’s knitting circle .
do herpes invade the anus? or do they stick to twat and mouth? if you see what i’m getting at…
Nice pants and purse, shithead!
That’s no way to talk about a young girl.
i always wondered what would happen if Rose McGowan was blonde.
And didn’t get into an accident that would lead her to fuck her face up.
No dobrah do youngee, con kung, Jabba!
Hairdresser: “So what are we doing today, Ms. Plimpton?”
Martha: “I want to try something new… I know, make me look like I have Down Syndrome!”
Hairdresser: “Coming up!”
**snip! snip! snip!**
It don’t mean a bollix
If you ain’t got the forty six
Do wop do wop do wop
Bravo, Mr. P!. Bravo.
Jonny P! FTW
It’s that an “Easy A” on her blouse? Cause I doubt she could sport a rough D! Next!
Yeah, if I had been married to Nicolas Cage, I probably would have joined a cult too.
Some Nike high tops would really pull that ensemble together.
As soon as i saw this post i was thinking wtf is she thinking about with those boots???
“I’m a little tea pot short and stout…”
Of course SHE showed up. It’s the attention whore event of the season.
Whatever you do, lay off of those blue suede shoes!
Hey stupid! you are supposed to be Luke skywalker with Star wars not a Walker from the Walking dead.
Pauly D and the Situation hit the scene in season 23 of The Jersey Shore.
I don’t want to alarm anyone but one of those is NOT Hayden Christensen…
*rubs chin thoughtfully* Hmmm, which one?
Damn it… Fish corrected it…
Where I come from, black people respect themselves sir.
She will take what is hers with tits and ass?
Oh and here I was gonna comment on how much clothing what’s her name again, was wearing… Oh Aubrey, yeah.
Has anyone already made the Martha Blimpton joke? Because if not, I’d like to call it.
I thought it was fuckin’ Meatloaf at first…
Agreed. He would do anything for love but won’t turn to the darkside?
i totally thought that too!
Yep, I for sure thought it was Meatloaf also. Has anyone seen Meatloaf and Mark Hamill in the same place at the same time?
Hair coloring so natural it fooled EVERYBODY. Nice going, Mick!
you’ll look that way too if your future husband draws for Marvel.
I think she was trying to be Daenerys from Game Of Thrones. But damn, she could have gotten a better wig.
Again: Gayer than a tree full of parrots.
I bet you he smells like the vinyl seat in a McDonalds in the middle of summer on the equator.
Looks like she borrowed one of Nicki Minaj’s wigs for the day.
What a dish
In the sense that her outfit reminds me of Corningware, yes.
Tomfrank.. That..is funny
Awesome looking old lady!
Who ‘dat?
“His penis?? Tastes pretty good…”
Sweetie, Daddy needs you to help dress him like a 70′s gay street hustler.