The Crap We Missed – Friday 12.28.12

December 28th, 2012 // 469 Comments

Welcome to a special Christmas Edition of The Crap We Missed. It took us a week to build and since Christmas is officially over, consider this your bonus stocking that we stuffed full of whores and douchebags, because we care. We tried including everyone this holiday season, so we left no erect nipple unturned, no awkward pose, or satisfied post-murder gaze cast aside. There’s even two Kim Kardashian shots because titties and “Oh shit, she likes doing what with the pee-pee now?” So unwrap Miley Cyrus delivering Daddy his present and have an intellectual debate about what delivered the death blow to Jesus’ b-day: Nicki Minaj‘s Cameltoe Extravaganza or filling a Santa suit with douche.

Oh yeah, we also found another gift behind the couch (Hint: It’s down there and it’s full of random bikinis),

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. John Mayer Santa Costume Katy Perry Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    Katy needs to wax that ‘stache

  2. Miley Cyrus Sex Doll In Car Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    From the veins on the boobs, I’m assuming that’s the Kim Kardashian blow up doll.

  3. Antonio Banderas Puffy Jacket Snow Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    How to look like a douche in two easy colors.

  4. Arsenio Hall Angry
    Commented on this photo:

    His nickname would be “Arse”, wouldn’t it?

  5. Russell Simmons Covered In Sand Doing Yoga
    Commented on this photo:

    [img]http://www.thesuperficial.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/28/bchi-340_331.jpg[/img]

  6. Lady Victoria Hervey Bony Chest Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Ladies and gentlemen, may I present “U.K. Paris Hilton.”

  7. Josie Goldberg Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    “does this bikini make me look fat?”

    no, but the skinny chick behind you does.

  8. Sam Jones III Los Angeles Missioin
    Commented on this photo:

    Good for him for volunteering.Wait, unless volunteering counts towards community service hours… and where’s that blond skank he’s always with?

  9. Chris Hemsworth Pushing Stroller Elsa Pataky Nipples
    Commented on this photo:

    Hmm. I never knew it got that cold in Santa Monica.

  10. Jill Martin Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Who? Wait, sorry. I meant, “Eww”.

  11. Jill Martin Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    whoa…butterface. and butterass. and..fuckit, nice tits.

  12. Kim Kardashian Cleavage Sports Bra
    Commented on this photo:

    armpit cleavage…

  13. Laurence Fishburne Bowler Hat Purple Shoes Laker Game
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice kicks, Oddjob.

  14. John Mayer Santa Costume Katy Perry Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    [img]http://www.thesuperficial.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/28/DanAykroydSanta-300_323.jpg[/img]

  15. Nicki Minaj Cameltoe Stretch Pants Cleavage Christmas Extravaganza
    Commented on this photo:

    that’s not normal.

  16. Simon Cowell Life Jacket Jetski
    Natty Ice
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah Simon, we’re wondering what the hell Russell Simmons is doing on the beach too.

  17. Vince Vaughn Knit Hat Frowning
    Quix
    Commented on this photo:

    Grumpy cat!

  18. Samuel L Jackson Laker Game
    Commented on this photo:

    Talk about being appropriately dressed for an event.

  19. Jessica Simpson Cleavage Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    It took me a while to notice that there’s a chair under her.

  20. Russell Simmons Covered In Sand Doing Yoga
    Commented on this photo:

    He just sees a prostitute and is getting ready to charge.

  21. Halle Berry Olivier Martinez
    Commented on this photo:

    I wheel sneef tha cheeze.

  22. Mariah Carey Huge Butt Tight Jeans
    Commented on this photo:

    I VILL CRUSH YOU.

  23. Ian Somerhalder Scarf Fedora Sunglasses
    Commented on this photo:

    My wife has that scarf.

    She is a woman.

  24. Val Kilmer Skinny Weight Loss
    Commented on this photo:

    Lookin good baby!

  25. Malia Obama Secret Service Agents
    akd
    Commented on this photo:

    Ahh, $4 million at it’s finest!

  26. Jessica Simpson Cleavage Twitter
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    I saw this girl on cops, they arrested her for possession of meth

  27. Vince Vaughn Knit Hat Frowning
    Commented on this photo:

    Grumpy Cat: The Movie, starring Vince Vaughn. Coming 2013.

  28. Coco Nipple See Through Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh…I saw mommy blowing gay Santa Claus…”

  29. John Mayer Santa Costume Katy Perry Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh…I saw mommy blowing gay Santa Claus…”

  30. Laurence Fishburne Bowler Hat Purple Shoes Laker Game
    Commented on this photo:

    “You wear the red shoes – the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You wear the blue shoes – you stay in Wonderland and we can go to a 24-hour, all you can eat pancake buffet.”

  31. Miley Cyrus Sex Doll In Car Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    Did he hire Larry King’s stylist?

  32. Miley Cyrus Sex Doll In Car Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    Where Cathy adores a minuet,
    The Ballet Russes, and crepe suzette,
    Our Miley loves to rock and roll,
    A hot dog makes her lose control —
    What a wild duet!

  33. Russell Simmons Covered In Sand Doing Yoga
    jorge
    Commented on this photo:

    loved his character in shallow hal

  34. Sam Jones III Los Angeles Missioin
    Commented on this photo:

    Is this a Flash Gordon sequel?

  35. Jessica Simpson Cleavage Twitter
    Mama Pinkus
    Commented on this photo:

    Her boob and calf appear to be around the same size

  36. Russell Simmons Covered In Sand Doing Yoga
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s a good thing he’s been practicing all that yoga, it’ll help him take the tranny hooker’s dick better tonight

  37. Malia Obama Secret Service Agents
    Commented on this photo:

    Let’s play “Spot the Dressed-Down Secret Service Agent”

  38. Gary Busey
    Commented on this photo:

    “My momma always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.”

  39. Simon Cowell Life Jacket Jetski
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hmmm…….this vest covers up my man boobs nicely….INDEED….”

  40. Vince Vaughn Knit Hat Frowning
    Commented on this photo:

    You know Hollywood has officially run out of ideas when they make Big Mouth Billy Bass: The Movie.

  41. Khloe Kardashian Kris Jenner Bruce Jenner Clippers Game
    Commented on this photo:

    Khloe: “I wonder how big that guy’s cock is.”
    Kris: “I wonder how much money that guy makes.”
    Bruce: “Won’t somebody please kill me?”

    • Trauma Queen

      Khloe: “I wonder how big that guy’s cock is.”
      Kris: “I wonder how much money that guy makes.”
      Bruce: “I wonder how big that guy’s cock is.”

    • Sheppy

      Khloe: “I wonder how big that guy’s cock is.”
      Kris: “I wonder how much money that guy makes.”
      Bruce: “My face looks normal. NORMAL!”

  42. Vince Vaughn Knit Hat Frowning
    Commented on this photo:

    And they say “Money can’t buy happiness!”

  43. Rihanna Butt Tight Jeans
    jorge
    Commented on this photo:

    B.F.D

  44. Kim Kardashian Kanye West Clippers Game
    Commented on this photo:

    (talking to girlfriend next to her)

    “Oh #9? I’m not sure, I only slept with his teammates…yeah…but #22 definitely has the clap or something, I’m on my fourth round of antibiotics.”

  45. Malia Obama Secret Service Agents
    Commented on this photo:

    From the looks of pedo-face back there in the striped polo, I’m not convinced that this isn’t the opener for a very special episode of Law & Order: SVU.

  46. Josie Goldberg Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    So she survived?!?!

    I thought for sure she died after they shot her with the shotgun in that “Whale Wars” commercial I saw the other night!

  47. Josie Goldberg Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    AHHHHHHHHHH! Photos of real people! Get it away!

  48. Jill Martin Bikini
    dude
    Commented on this photo:

    buttereverything

  49. Simon Cowell Life Jacket Jetski
    Commented on this photo:

    That morning: “I like this vest, but it’s a lit-tle too butch…what should I counter it with?…”

  50. Arsenio Hall Angry
    Commented on this photo:

    I assume he got the ticket as a Christmas gift. There’s no way he could afford one on his own.

Leave A Comment