“Yes, I know it’s aimed at my penis. That’s why I made her wear it there.”
Here’s the rest of the Oscars red carpet photos plus Brooklyn Decker who wasn’t technically at the Oscars but her breasts are huge, so close enough. Think of this post as honoring the splendor of the Academy Awards if not the spirit hence all that side-pussy talk beneath George Clooney because, seriously, what the hell is that thing? Does he just turn to the right whenever he gets bored. “Hey, Brad, didn’t see you over there. And, oh, look, you brought pictures of the kids.” *turns to the right*
Photos: Getty
“And the Oscar for indifference about the Oscars goes to . . . Frank Burns!”. Pass.
Motherhood has been very good to her.
fuck this bitch AND the Giants.
Surely there were more than 5 people there.
I can’t decide who’s luckier – the ex-wrestler or the rich guy that gets to untwist those legs each night.
When she got up to speak, it seemed to me she was three sheets to the wind.
Mr. & Mrs. Douche Chills.
Its so hot when chicks use a cereal bowl to cut their hair.
It’s a pity the bowl wasn’t full of fruitloops with milk.I would love to eat them off her face.
Her newfound ego managed to fit into that dress? Amazing.
So if Dracula came back as a skinny white chick, this is what she’d look lke?
Not funny.
Yeah, probably won’t go down as a classic, however, your critique was fucking brilliant.
I thought it was funny
me too
“Gwyneth! Gwyneth! How many Bothans died to get you to the Oscars?”
Enough of this elegance shit, put a thong on and bend over. (Yes, I do mean Stacy.)
The illegitimate daughter of Moe Howard.
Thats the first thing I thought lol
She was there representing the moron contingent.
Yeah I’m about bored with movies. Why don’t they invent something new? Did everyone with intelligence die about a hundred years ago? We’re living off the creative ideas of people that died 80 years go, and they wonder why they aren’t making as much money as they’re used to. Invent something new, if you don’t know how then fire everyone until you find a genius to hire.
Hollywood works on the buddy system. Friend of a friend carries more weight in who gets hired than talent. That’s why most movies suck these days.
“So I did a cleanse for a week, had an herbal wrap and then I was able to fit into this dress that was made by Jor-El and flown in all the way from Krypton.
Genius! +1 Omg
Allah, Jesus, and Mohammed wove it for her using white hair from God’s beard, because only a fabric of that nature can contain the beautiful spirit that is Gwyneth Paltrow. Just ask her.
It’s difficult to imagine that George Clooney ever has a moment where he doesn’t have reason to smile.
Check the white dude over Old Grey’s left shoulder. That’s a serious lucky motherfucker stare…
20 Years and you still haven’t cured AIDS? What are you spending the money on? You’re a fucking failure if you’re still doing that bullshit with no God fucking damn result.
There’s no cure for the common cold, either. Maybe you should unleash your giant brain on the project since all researchers are failures.
‘There’s no cure for the common cold’
Just ask one of my direct reports…she has a cold every other Monday and Friday (alternating weekends).
it’s impossible to cure AIDS – the scientists can’t get the lab rats to buttfuck
They have no desire to cure anything, then they would not be able to get idiots to keep giving billions of dollars to them a year so they can claim 80% of it for “expenses”.
“Maybe you should unleash your giant brain on the project since all researchers are failures”
I’d fucking rather not. Your death by AIDS would be an improvement on the species. You wont be missed.
There’s no money to be made in curing a disease. Treating it indefinitely, now that’s another matter.
FYI, there are 2 cases of cure of HIV+ individuals so there is a progress. according to u theory then why do we have cure for dx such as gonorrhea, syphilis , some cancers ?
Blah give me more Steve O and Elisabetta Canalis pics lol
I think she’s pretty
Great Rack! Roddick you are one lucky SOB!
As good as it gets.
she looks very beautiful
Man. Paula Poundstone looks hideous!
A milf that fights Zombies
No Octavia Spencer?
Damn you Grey Wolf!
This picture doesn’t look like her normal face. Is it just a bad picture or did she get a face job?
That’s the half dozen double gin and tonics, no voluntary control of facial expressions face.
Kind of makes me think of the pretty teacher at school. Not a knockout, but pretty enough to prompt an orchard of 15 year old boners.
Beard.
that’s what I was thinking
Dream on…
She’s wearing a special merkin for the occasion.
Keibler is so hot.
And it’s obvious Clooney doesnt give too shits about her, he wouldnt even look at her last night.
(I think I just turned a little gay for making this statement).
So now’s my chance!
Hate to pull your choke chain FB, but he said he turned just a little gay.
So, if he’s a little gay, you two will get together, diff-brown, and one of you will tell the other he’s a “fag” and leave? You’ll have to explain it to me.
Damn, is it me, or did she age about 10 years since last year?
True so true I was wondering who else was going to comment on that.
She’s so darn cute.
OVERRATED…and not half as hot as she thinks she is
It’s her personality that’s hot.. not just her looks.
I’d pepper her pot.
she has a very nice “decker”!
“Tit’s but a walking hollow, an absent boob
That struts and frets red dots upon the stage
And then is seen no more: it is a lie
Held by an idiot, full of air and fabric,
Turgifying nothing.”
That said, she’s as fucking gorgeous as always.
… if you like abnormally short arms.
Holy shit, you’d better be in The Most Important People; that’s fucking brilliant.
With all due respect: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
CCI was just going to say, “Look at me, I’m so cute”
I need an insulin shot every time I see this tart. Meh. She was great in DICK and nothing since.
I think Spock looks terrific!
“To show her support for “Saving Face”, Gwyneth showed up with the accessory du jour, a Pakistani man’s head.”
The girl on the left has a face even rounder than Miley’s…huh.
Boring.
It is NOT ok to wear all white, upon white, upon white–get over yourself! Boring.
Bingo!
The zombies got her in the end, apparently.
40 year old Gwyneth Paltrow looks 55.
I watched Clooney when he gave that tour of his house the other day and listened to him last night and you can tell he is just a prick. I like him as an actor, but he just seems like he is a Grade A jerk in private. I feel sorry for the women he dates, I bet he is just an ass to them.
She’s dead to me now after fucking that ballet frog.