That’s More Like It

August 20th, 2010 // 40 Comments

What at first seemed like another sad example of PTSD gone horribly wrong, has finally revealed itself as your typical “Boy Uses Swamp Pig for Publicity” thus restoring balance to the universe and allowing me to stop writing letters to the Pentagon. *chucks crayons out the window* RadarOnline reports:

The same day RadarOnline.com reported that his romance with Jersey Shore’s Snooki had hit a road bump, Jeff Miranda was spotted living it up at a New York City strip club.
Stopping in at the Sapphire Gentlemen’s Club on Wednesday night, Miranda was interviewed by Chaunce Hayden for his Shovio.com web-TV broadcast, Steppin Out of the Tabloids with Chaunce Hayden, live from 8 to 9pm. While at the club Miranda spent some time with porn star Savanna Samson and Penthouse Pet Anju McIntyre – in fact both girls were fighting over Snooki’s boyfriend!
“Miranda did little to resist and was seen canoodling with Samson after the show,” a source told RadarOnline.com exclusively.

Turns out Jeff Miranda here auditioned for Jersey Shore and didn’t make the cut. Which explains why MTV has apparently slapped a muzzle on him:

When it comes to Angelina’s claims that he tried out for Jersey Shore, Miranda admitted, “It is true that four months ago I received an email asking me to send in an audition tape. And I did. I admit, I did try out for the show.“
However, he stopped short of saying where their relationship was currently at. “Due to confidentiality, I can not talk anymore about my relationship with Nicole at this time. That may change but for now I can’t make any further comments about Nicole or anyone else on the show.”

Honestly, I don’t care if this guy’s dad owns MTV or he has footage of The Situation banging Paulie D in a vat of tanning oil. I’m just happy to know our brave soldiers aren’t coming home and shoving their penis in Snooki because of deep psychological wounds that the military writes off as “just being pussies.” You came through today, America. You came through.

Photos: Splash News

superficial

  1. its me fuckers

    one thing I sure as hell wouldn’t want to see on Snooki is her “O” face.

  2. adrienne

    this girl looks like 5 miles of bad road between Dallas and Houston….

    • Crusty

      That’s particularly scary given that there’s 245 miles of bad road between Dallas and Houston, any 5 of which can be selected.

  3. craig

    yo this is bullshit why does this guy get to bang playmates and pornstars hes got lines shaved into his air and hes not even famous hes not even rich!! he wasnt even on the fucking show!

    • Cock Dr

      Just goes to show how dumb those women are.
      They think he’s famous & will help them out in their entertainment careers…because he’s having intercourse with the “Snookie”.
      Perhaps they should look into enrolling at a local community college instead. There’s always a need for pretty dental assistants or someone to sponge bathe seniors at the nursing home.

  4. WOW

    Jersy seams like it’s full of ugly skanks and meatheads

  5. grobpilot

    Pic #1: She looks like a fucking Sleestak.

  6. Jack

    Craig, jealously over whores isn’t a good look, homie

  7. Ksurfiws

    I wouldn’t bang her with your dick and the fish pushing

  8. Meh

    Grob – funniest thing I’ve read all day. Congrats.

  9. squiggy

    Comments fail. Are the jersey shore rejects now residing in the superficial’s comments sections? Somehow that seems appropriate. Can’t we get some actual commentary in here?

    C’mon, it’s a story about Snooki, that shit writes itself.

  10. “While at the club Miranda spent some time with porn star Savanna Samson and Penthouse Pet Anju McIntyre – in fact both girls were fighting over Snooki’s boyfriend!”

    And like Snooki, they are attracted to rich stench of Tag body spray and loose 5 dollar bills…and maybe bacon fat.

  11. John

    Is there a way to bookmark this site so that Snooki posts don’t show up?

  12. Snooki
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice hair cut douche.

  13. McFeely Smackup

    Are these articles written by morons?

    “While at the club Miranda spent some time with porn star Savanna Samson and Penthouse Pet Anju McIntyre – in fact both girls were fighting over Snooki’s boyfriend!”

    It’s a FUCKING STRIP CLUB! They’re actually surprised the dancers in a strip club pay attention to a guy. As for the “canoodling”, it’s called a lap dance, and costs $20. idiots.

    Am I missing something, or have these two been at an amusement park for like a month now?

  14. Deanna

    Snooki is a sweet girl. A little aloof, but she has genuine good qualities which can’t be said for many other people in Hollywood

  15. Crayons, eh? I pegged you as more of a washable marker type, Fish.

  16. oooaaahhh

    ENOUGH WITH THESE PEOPLE(?) ALREADY!!

    • In case you’ve forgotten, this website’s main purpose is to make fun of celebrities. Though you and I may disagree about whether or not they’re legit celebs, there are many that do. Besides, who better to poke fun at than these tan-streaked failures at life?

      • steve

        I thought the websites main purpose was to show bitches in bikinis and keep me up to date with the stupid shit these broads be talking about at the bar.

  17. Snooki
    burton
    Commented on this photo:

    this chick is so ugly..short anf fat, yeah bud you gotyourself a WINNER,lol.

  18. Internet

    My girlfriend has the SAME EXACT boyfriend.

  19. stinky mcpoop

    Since they already have a character called The Situation, maybe they can call him The Miranda Rights. Ar Ar Ar!

  20. Snooki
    Mike Walker
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like she’s 50.

    Nice shirt, douchebag.

  21. Sardonic

    ‘Swamp Pig’ – good one, Fish!

  22. Snooki
    not the superficial
    Commented on this photo:

    he looks like joe from family guy

  23. captain america

    psssst: WHEN DO WE SEE HER VAGINA?
    …….please?

  24. Rhialto

    Is it legal to have her unleashed walking around!?

  25. Snooki
    Lissa
    Commented on this photo:

    isn’t it funny how these Jersey kids look so buff, yet so oompa loompa fatty at the same time? I find the way they look so amusing.

  26. Snooki
    chelsea
    Commented on this photo:

    her hand is like a fat little spider attaching itself to his jugular to suck the life out of him.

    gross.

  27. SNOOKIE WANT SMOOSH SMOOSH!

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