Taylor Momsen Will See Miley’s Lesbian Kiss and Raise Her All This Stuff

March 21st, 2011 // 136 Comments

Last summer, months before she even turned 18, Miley Cyrus set the world aflutter by kissing girls on stage in-between choreographed vagina diddles. So, of course, Taylor Momsen has added a simulated girl-on-girl orgy to her stage show, also months before turning 18. Except you really have to give Taylor the advantage here because she seems jaded enough to avoid the inevitable pregnancy waiting around the corner for Miley. Or she’ll get knocked up just to have an abortion and post in on YouTube with a skulls and Hello Kitty border. “Summer Vacay!” she’ll probably call it.

NOTE: I just looked up Taylor on Wikipedia for the first time to get her birthday, and where the hell did this chick go? Bring that one back.

Photos: Splash News


  1. “First” gets a visit from Chris Hansen.

  2. Licensed Gynocologist

    What’s with these kids and the untoned bodies. If I wanted pasty fat I’d be Kristie Alley’s bedspread.

  3. JC

    Sorry, Taylor. If you’re going to do this properly, you’re going to need to bury your face in some muff on stage. Make it happen.

  4. phil

    does she like dick?

  5. Chubby jailbait faux lesbian stage orgy…Taylor continues to push the limits of “edgy” in as predictable a fashion as could be imagined. I can’t wait to see the massive pile of fail she pulls out when “underage” isn’t the sole point of her act.

    Now go do some situps you damn kids.

    • Jimbo Jones

      seriously right? TV has led me to believe that all teen girls were hot, toned, temptresses. Hell, my MOM could look that good in that little skirt – a thought that makes me want to vomit just as much as looking at this kid.

    • Pe Ye

      I can see a sex tape in Taylor’s future when she hits 18. And I will be thanking the lord above for it trust me.

  6. Star Droppings

    Is that Blossom?

  7. loeber

    I have never seen her “perform” anywhere but low ceilinged, accoustic paneled, neon beer sign hanging bars. At least Miley faked her lesbianism in front of an actual crowd.

  8. Anon

    I guess they dress up their sacks of flour in lingerie in Whoville.

  9. GrandDragon

    It’s a beer gut contest. Momsen has been challenged!

    • fallout boy

      Yeah that is fully disgusting. Why on earth does she think anyone wants to see that shit?? Just because your self esteem is so low that you can pull this off, doesn’t mean it’s sexy or appealing or edgy in any way. It just means you’re oblivious to what a slob you look like.
      If this is gonna be happening, I WILL attend one of her ‘performances’ with a nice healthy carton of rotten eggs to hurl. If the place subsequently burns down, well that’s just a bonus and I swear in advance I will have had nothing to do with it.

  10. Any Guy

    I guess she’s never heard the phrase ‘trying too hard’, like EVER.

    She even fails at trying to look like a ‘with-it’ lesbo, because that broad she dragged up on stage needs a pink belly done on her – stat. EWW.

    I like how she’s supposed to be all ‘edgy and dark’ yet her band’s music sounds like any number of failed singles by American Idol cast-offs.

  11. Hey you, wanna slap muffin tops?

  12. DS

    Bellybucking contest?

  13. Karen

    Afterward, they wrote angry non-rhyming poetry in all lower-case letters.

  14. Dodo Uptown

    That girl with her is a fucking eyesore. Jesus, get some pride, you puffy albino pig. If I wanted to see something like this I’d pay my nana to let me watch her bathe.

  15. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    “she’ll get knocked up just to have an abortion and post in on YouTube with a skulls and Hello Kitty border. “Summer Vacay!”
    Not even the blogger’s visceral humor can make up for this sad, muffin topped spectacle.

  16. Holland


  17. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Senor Trout
    Commented on this photo:

    Who knew Mischa Barton had the agility to dance AND sing, all in those boots? Someone needs to point out to her though that the X on her partner’s hand indicates she was rejected by quality control.

  18. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Commented on this photo:

    1, 3, 2, 4

  19. Pasty Flabby PseudoLesbo

    “You are a fake lesbian! I’m bigger than you and higher on the food chain! Git in mah belly!”

  20. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Commented on this photo:


  21. See Alice

    Is that Alyson Hannigan ?

  22. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Tyler Perry
    Commented on this photo:

    Sexual chocolate……

  23. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Commented on this photo:

    Taylor Momsen – keepin’ cerebal palsy sexy since 2010

  24. Minerva Smelibut

    I’m sorry, but don’t those two seem a bit gassy? Honey if ya can’t eat the cabbage then stay outta the salad bar

  25. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Commented on this photo:

    if that’s a gut than all you women here are in trouble

  26. zilly

    Ooooh! I’m a really angsty teenager, raaaaaaaar!

  27. Panda Thunder

    That’s not how you make a baby!

    Or is it….

  28. Hey mediocre girl, If you aren’t even going to commit to an effective eating disorder how am I supposed to buy this whole “underage lesbian slut” shtick?

  29. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Commented on this photo:

    Did she borrow this chick from Snooki’s party?

  30. Deacon Jones

    Hey Fish….

    That pic you referenced, the “before” picture. She was 15 in that photo ;)

    Welcome to the club, pervert!

  31. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Commented on this photo:

    Dear Parents, you have failed.

  32. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Commented on this photo:

    Pst…I farted.

  33. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Damien Louis
    Commented on this photo:

    Young tits on the stage, locked in a lesbian embrace? How old is too old to go to that club?

  34. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Commented on this photo:

    Some days when I feel down about my life, I think to myself, “Somewhere, there’s a musician that has to play bass behind this every night”. Then I feel a lot better.

  35. ick-abod

    Finally, Hanson is back on tour.

  36. BigJim

    Wait, I thought Ke$ha was blonde.

  37. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Poopface McGee
    Commented on this photo:

    Black leather granny panties? I’m in love.

  38. JC

    I can only assume that hand on the left edge of the photo belongs to someone trying to convince the redhead to put her shirt back on.

  39. wat

    Yeah, she was really pretty before she went all emo/goth/aids.

    • Cock Dr

      And when this current tour is over & she has something else to promote you’ll see the great Momsen makeover. She’ll chop off most of her hair, maybe dye it, totally change the makeup & style.
      In the meantime we have the heroin chic raccoon persona.

      • “To thine own self be true” doesn’t carry a lot of weight with this douche. I remember when a person’s reputation used to mean something.

        *sniff* I’m getting old, aren’t I?

  40. ...and the guys chant

    “Put it on! Put it all on!”

  41. bob

    I consider myself a sex obsessed pervert, but this leaves me cold. Silly little girls trying to be ‘edgy’ and shit. They’re all minging too.

  42. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Commented on this photo:

    oh leave Taylor alone, so she likes to have sex with pregnant women.

  43. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Commented on this photo:

    Taylor Momsen tosses one of her many, many, many dildos into the crowd.

  44. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Commented on this photo:

    When did Harley-Davidson start making adult diapers?

  45. makes sense

    it makes perfect sense. This is all just a show. That kid didnt go anywhere it just got pushed to the side because of a publicity stunt. They make her act like some stripper wannabe so her band can ger a bunch of publicity. No one would even have heard of the pretty recklass without her acting like some wannabe devil whorshipper. And when she started the band maybe they thought she wasnt cool enough to be in a band and they wanted to make her a badass and bring in a harder crowd. Shes just a wannabe. I wish she would just stop. shes trying way too hard to be a badass

  46. rican

    Photo #8, she’s wearing Ke$ha’s panties!!

  47. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Double D
    Commented on this photo:

    When skankily dressed 17-year-olds KILL your boner, something ain’t right.

  48. blocparty86

    No breasts, no ass, no hips or any femininity… fish why do you continue to post this? Skinny with no shape is not hot! Being a size two has nothing on a size eight woman with curves. Please fix this asap.

    P.S. No more pasty white women and no more orange fake tan women either.

  49. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Commented on this photo:

    Was there fisting after the scat? ‘Cause that’d be a show.

  50. Taylor Momsen Lesbian Kiss
    Commented on this photo:

    Love’s Still a Battlefield.

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