Paula Deen


More Paula Deen stories

Tracy Morgan’s Emmy Appearance Almost Got Ruined By Paula Deen

You never know when Paula Deen will strike next. More »

Paula Deen On ‘Dancing With The Stars’ Is Going As Expected

Paula Deen on a dancing show with a diverse cast? Why that’s just a recipe for some fun, sugah. Now g’on dress live a field girl and dance for ol’ Paula. More »

Say, How’s Ol’ Paula Deen Doing?

You can’t make brownface without buttah and sugah, sugah. That’s the Paula Deen way. More »

Paula Deen’s Video Game Will Melt Your Mind Into Buttah, Sugah

Paula Deen has a video game, and the trailer will fry your brain like a goddamn egg. More »

Paula Deen Shut Down Uncle Bubba’s Seafood & Oyster House. Thanks, Obama

Now look what you Commie liberal faggots did. All because she said some sweet, kind, Southern genteel words about making colored folk dress up like beautiful plantation slaves like the glorious days of the south when it was legal to own them like property, poor Paula Deen closed her restaurant without the courtesy of notifying… More »

Paula Deen’s Just Like That Gay Black Fellow Trying To Play Football

“I’mma call you Mammy, sugah.”

Because eight months has been a long enough exile for thinking black people dressed as plantation slaves are an acceptable wedding decoration – Or saying “nigger” once in the 80s to a bank robber, as this story will continually be spun. – Paula Deen has launched a $75More »

What It’s Like To Go On The Paula Deen Cruise

After a public relations disaster thanks to a lawsuit she ended up settling out of court after giving a now-pointless and career-destroying deposition that confirmed to the world she thinks making African-Americans dress up like plantation slaves is an acceptable wedding decoration, Paula Deen vanished from public sight. Except now she’s planning a $75 millionMore »

Paula Deen Tried To Use Prop 8 To Get Her Lawsuit Dismissed. Of Course.

“If y’all let homahsexuals like this’n here marry, then you must acquit.”

As this Paula Deen debacle has unrolled to reveal its bacon donut center with a butterfat butter glaze, I’ve been wondering how the hell her lawyer let her walk into a deposition and not only admit to using the word “nigger”More »

Paula Deen’s Publisher Cancelled Her Already #1 Best-Selling Cookbook

“Oh, how rude of me, sugah. Y’all probably never seen one of these in your village. This is a book. El book-o.

Because America is a shitty place, pre-orders of Paula Deen’s upcoming cookbook “Paula Deen’s New Testament: 250 Favorite Recipes, All Lightened Up” shot to #1 on Amazon as a direct result… More »

I Think Paula Deen’s Been Fired Enough, Everybody

In the past 24 hours since Paula Deen’s disastrous TODAY interview, she’s been fired by Target, Home Depot, Walmart and the diabetes medication Novo Nordisk which is just getting way out of hand. Target I can understand because people like me shop there so we can walk around saying, “Oh, I never shop at Walmart,” More »

Paula Deen Will Talk Like Popeye Now, Let He Who Is Without Spinach Cast The First Stone

“I is what I is,” Paula Deen said this morning on TODAY while impressively sticking to her new PR crisis team’s message that she’s being maliciously crucified by the liberal media for only saying nigger once in her entire life in 1986 when a black man held a gun to her head. And you know,… More »

Even Ham Fired Paula Deen. Loyal, Delicious Ham.

If there’s one person who should be standing by Paula Deen’s side as Obama fires her for saying nigger once 35 years ago, it’s ham. Ham should be gently cupping Paula’s jowls in its hand saying, “Shh, shh, you come from a different time. You can’t help it. Now jam that baster full of butter… More »

Paula Deen’s Getting Fired From Everything

When we last left Paula Deen before bailing for the weekend, her company released a statement literally reminding everyone that Paula Deen is very old and from the South, so it’s really not her fault she’s a tad racisty. She also bailed on Matt Lauer and then began a very public tailspin in which she… More »

Paula Deen Releases Statement: ‘I’m Old And From The South, You Idiots’

“Have I ever tried cooking with brown sugar? Whatever do you- Oh, I see what you did there. (Fetch me the sheriff. Quickly.)”

Earlier in the week, Paula Deen found herself in some sugar-shit, sugar, when during a court deposition she not only confirmed that she has on occasion referred to coloreds as… More »

Paula Deen: ‘Why, Of Course, I Say The N-Word, Sugar. Doesn’t Everybody?’

“A ha! Ahaha! *wipes tears* I’m sorry, sugah, I coulda sworn you said the one behind me was going to read. Could you imagine?”

When we last left Paula Deen, she was being sued after her brother and Uncle Bubba’s Oyster House co-owner allegedly sexually harassed kitchen manager Lisa Jackson whenever he wasn’t… More »

Paula Deen Wanted To Dress Up ‘N-ggers’ And Make Them Tap Dance Like Shirley Temple. Allegedly.

“Is that a negro? Bring it here. I desire jazz hands.”

Paula Deen and her brother Bubba Hiers (This story’s great already, I know.) are currently being sued for sexual harrasment by Lisa Jackson the former general manager of their jointly-owned restaurant Uncle Bubba’s Oyster House. Along with claims that Bubba openly watched… More »

Anthony Bourdain Nails Paula Deen. Not Like That.

“Thinking of getting into the leg-breaking business, so I can profitably sell crutches later.”

Anthony Bourdain after Paula Deen announced her endorsement deal with Novo Nordisk.

Photo: via IDLYITW

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Paula Deen Has Type 2 Diabetes? Get Out.

Seen here asking Santa for a new foot, Paula Deen has officially confirmed she has Type 2 diabetes proving Jesus has not only quit affecting the outcome of football games this week but is over preventing morbidly obese Southerners from dying in a butter coffin of their own making. “I get bored,” I believe where… More »