Over the past few days, Mark Walhberg has been trying to get a pardon for his 1988 assault conviction when he beat a Vietnamese man in the head with a wooden stick leaving him blind in one eye. But Marky Mark goes to church every day now and opened a restaurant with his bruddas, so… More »
Probably coz Jenny McCarthy’s gawddamn tits make you wanna mastahbate, and when you mastahabate you ain’t gawt enough strength to stawp 9/11, frickin’ Mahky Mahk didn’t even go to his brotha Donnie’s weddin’ in frickin’ Chicago. But he did send him this wickid pissah video on Instagram which the cheap bastahd prawbly counted as a… More »
Here’s the full-length trailer for Transformers: Age of Extinction which surprisingly is not about Mark Wahlberg stopping 9/11 while riding a robot dinosaur (a euphemism for the awesomeness of non-masturbatory vaginal sex if there ever was one), so whoever wrote it can fuck themselves in the face until they get throat cancer and die. That’s… More »
Tom Cruise found himself in some shit over the weekend after making some poor, albeit slightly out of context, statements equating acting to serving in Afghanistan. Naturally, this left him open to criticism except from say another actor who claimed he could’ve stopped 9/11 with his fists where an Israeli Special Forces officer could not. More »
“Hey, Jahvis. Wanna know why my ahms shoot freakin’ laser beams?
Because I don’t masturbate.” *skreeeeee-BOOOSH*
In a recent interview, Mark Wahlberg revealed that he’d love to be the next Iron Man which is, of course, ridiculous on its face because Tony Stahk ain’t no freakin’ Southie. Even more ridiculous is why… More »
Mark Wahlberg and America have an understanding that if he was on one of dose planes on 9/11 it woulda been a whole ‘nother story, so he’s not about to live in fear of some 14-year-old cawk-suckin’ girls gettin’ all hawt and bawthered over Justin Bieber who he just called a little pot-smokin’ bastahd. Via… More »