Love Child


More Love Child stories

Chris Brown’s Baby’s Name Is ‘Royalty.’ Literally.

Chris Brown’s daughter name is Royalty. Yup. More »

Chris Brown Is A Dad, Your God Is Dead

Chris Brown is somebody’s father. This is our world now. More »

Pauly D Has A Love Child

“Shit, is that a meteor? Did I do that?!”

I used to always joke that Jersey Shore was the more responsible show than Teen Mom because at least the spray-tanned guidos weren’t actively shitting kids into the gene pool. But then Snooki ruined all that, and now Pauly D has confirmed he knocked… More »

Dan Marino Admits He Has A Love Child

“You want me to sign the inside of your vagina with my penis ink? I don’t see how that’s a collectible, but okay…”

Ace Ventura star, and previously revered family man, Dan Marino has admitted to the New York Post that he knocked up, Donna Savvattere, a CBS production assistant who then birthed… More »

Mariah Yeater Was Going To Give Bieber Baby Up For Adoption (UPDATE: And Claimed Ex Was The Father)

Getting knocked up by Justin Bieber is not only every girl’s dream, it’s also a winning lottery ticket waiting to fly out of your uterus and carry you to the bank on gossamer maple-wings. Which makes it odd that Mariah Yeater was contemplating giving up her infant son for adoption because if she’s not lying… More »

Justin Bieber & Mariah Yeater: Who Raped Who?
A Special Report

Only this beluga whale knows the truth. But will it turn rat?

While the police are busy contemplating a statutory rape investigation after Mariah Yeater publicly admitted to having sex with a then-16-year-old Justin Bieber, the Maple Christ went on The Today Show this morning to deny fathering a baby before dancing his… More »

Mariah Yeater Is A ‘Good Person’ Who Just Happened To Statutory Rape Justin Bieber

Mariah Yeater, the 20-year-old California girl above who allegedly had unprotected sex with a 16-year-old Justin Bieber then sued him for paternity of her three-month-old son via a tabloid is really a “good, honest person,” according to her grandfather. “Why if it weren’t for that boy’s maple-penis, I reckon she’d be a doctor. Just look… More »

Aww, Justin Bieber’s First Paternity Suit

“Look, ma! I didn’t use my hands!”

When Justin Bieber’s mom sat him down and explained to him how an invisible maple syrup manifestation of God himself mysteriously impregnated her – and made her pancakes more delicious – she should’ve immediately followed that conversation up with, “Oh, by the way, I hope you… More »

January Jones Might Have Named Xander After His Father

Astute, sexual panther-like reader TomFrank made the following observation in the comments after January Jones named her illegitimate son Xander Dane who is allegedly the result of an affair with a married man on the set of X-Men: First Class. Except it turns out that last part might have been a tad off:

More »

Jay-Z Has A Secret Son

Apparently, Beyonce isn’t carrying Jay-Z’s firstborn, according to a new report that claims nine years ago he secretly knocked up a Trinidadian model Shenelle Scott who tried to convince her boyfriend Malik the baby was his only to have that plan blow up and earn her a million dollars in hush money. Via RadarOnline:
More »

Maria Shriver Didn’t Have Enough Sex With Arnold

“Do naht hate da playah, hate da game.”

Arnold Schwarzenegger reportedly used to complain that Maria Shriver didn’t have enough sex with him which seems like a weird reason to make yourself the target of a massive criminal investigation considering she looks like the goddamn Predator. And, yes, you read that right, Maria… More »

Maria Shriver Leaked The News of Arnold’s Love Child

Presumably because he pulled shit like, I dunno, taking his secret love child on family vacations, Maria Shriver originally planned to hold a press conference announcing Arnold Schwarzenegger had an affair with the maid, according to TMZ:

TMZ has new information from sources connected to Maria. We’re told when Maria found out that… More »

Page 1 of 3