Posts tagged "Captain America"

Thor’s A Woman And Captain America’s Probably Black #ThanksObama

In the same week that saw Archie gunned down in a mall shooting saving his gay best friend from a right-wing nut, Marvel announced on The View yesterday that Thor's a woman now. And according to writer Jason Aaron, "she's not She-Thor or Lady Thor. She's not …
By: The Superficial / July 16, 2014

Happy Birthday, America, You Fat Dumb Bastard

In honor of America's proud tradition of making things go "BOOM" to celebrate our independence from a country that far surpasses us in health care, education, gun control, you name it, The Superficial will be off today because a paid holiday's a paid holiday no matter whose bullshit birthday it is. (What's up, …
By: The Superficial / July 4, 2014

WEEKEND NERDIOR: Marvel Phase Two Edition

And now for the part of the week where I snuff out what tiny chance this site gives me of getting laid by rambling on about comics, video games and/or my deep concern about who's wearing green booty shorts next to Batman. I probably should've named this column "Dust Penis," but after months staring at …
By: The Superficial / April 7, 2013

If It Was Punchable, The Hulk Punched It:
A Review of ‘The Avengers’

"Seriously, guys, tell me that flying boat ride wasn't awesome. It even had a pirate with an eye patch! A black pirate, but that's okay 'cause this is the future." So last summer, I decided to spice things up because, frankly, you used to be way freakier before we moved in together. This resulted in …
By: The Superficial / May 7, 2012

‘The Avengers’ Has A Trailer

Whoever owns the rights to The Avengers now - I'm going with Scrooge McDuck. - has just released the official trailer that hits pretty much all the bases you expect it to hit along with some Nine Inch Nails music because apparently kids love nails three inches shy of a foot. Can't get enough …
By: The Superficial / October 11, 2011

The Superficial Presents: ‘The Avengers,’ A Tale of Dumb Face and Peppercorn

It's been a long, long time since I've done a caption gallery this large. In fact, it's been so many years that the old ones didn't even survive the migration from Movable Type to WordPress, essentially flushing hours upon hours of my life down the Internet toilet. Ahahahaha! *cries curled up in the shower for …
By: The Superficial / September 8, 2011

Here’s Scarlett Johansson’s The Avengers Costume in Broad Daylight

Hey, do you think she's pregnant? Despite the fact Iron Man 2 was essentially a jumbled, two-hour mess of a trailer for The Avengers that resulted in Jon Favreau bolting the franchise and Robert Downey Jr. cryptically biting the hand that saved him from becoming Charlie Sheen, …
By: The Superficial / September 6, 2011

Here’s Captain America’s New Costume in Broad Daylight, Of Course

I don't know what the hell is going on this summer, but apparently every single movie is shooting directly in front of the paparazzi because now here's Chris Evans in his new Captain America costume on the Cleveland set of The Avengers. I say new because for those of you who …
By: The Superficial / August 16, 2011

Cockblocked By War: A Review of ‘Captain America: The First Avenger’

"Oh, so now you're accusing me of stealing your topless scenes. Where do you get off?" Gabe from Videogum wrote a pitch-perfect opening for his review of X-Men: First Class that now, even more than it did for that movie, says exactly how I felt about Captain America after the credits …
By: The Superficial / July 23, 2011

‘Captain America’ Had a Premiere

Captain America, or Captain America: The First Avenger, as absolutely no one is calling it, had its Los Angeles premiere last night and has already won over curmudgeony film critic Jeff Wells who openly dreams of "strafing fanboys" at Comic-Con. So, until I get my review up …
By: The Superficial / July 20, 2011

Captain America is Going Bald

And apparently getting ready for the Top Gun remake. "I'm here for the gay volleyball." For some reason Chris Evans felt that a month before his massive summer blockbuster premieres would be a great time to tell E!'s Marc Malkin he's going bald just in case enough people …
By: The Superficial / June 8, 2011

So, Here’s Captain America in ‘The Avengers.’ He Likes Old Navy Tees.

Here's Chris Evans on Saturday shooting scenes in modern-day Times Square for apparently both the ending of Captain America and the beginning of The Avengers. Although, considering Marvel was still cramming cameos into Thor with barely a month to go before its release, these …
By: The Superficial / April 25, 2011

Ashley Greene is Banging Captain America

And she's even wearing the "A." Fantastic. Ashley Greene continues to enjoy her return to vaginal penetration after leaving Joe Jonas and has apparently steered her drunken bang-bus toward Captain America himself, Chris Evans, according to People: But Chris Evans, who stars as …
By: The Superficial / March 25, 2011

Super Bowl XLV: ‘Wait, These Are Nerd Movies…’

While the Pittsburgh Steelers and Green Bay Packers engaged in gridiron combat last night that set the stage for people of low moral fiber to make constant and repetitive rape jokes because Ben Roethlisberger rapes people, several trailers for summer tent poles debuted which you can check out below and …
By: The Superficial / February 7, 2011

Natalie Portman is Still Pregnant

Let's play a game. I'll point out the three things dominating the Internet today, and then you'll try to keep a straight face while saying it isn't entirely fueled by nerd-boners. Here we go: 1. Spider-Man getting butt-rammed. 2. The new Captain America poster. 3. Natalie Portman just walking …
By: The Superficial / February 4, 2011

First Look: Chris Evans as Captain America. Now With More Helmet.

You guys wanted more bulge. I got you more bulge. There have been various images of Chris Evans as Captain America on this net that so intertwines us. First, we had a burrito-stuffed stunt double, so that didn't really count. Then, Captain America: Old Navy Capris …
By: The Superficial / January 14, 2011

Wundergroin: Die Letzte Schlacht!

"Property of Billy Ray, Hitler." *BOFF* DAS ENDE. (Inspired by the events of Die Wundergroin Schlägt Wieder Zu!) Photo by Noah R-S: Photoshop Jesus …
By: The Superficial / November 12, 2010

Captain America is Not Charlie Sheen And Other News

Click Here for Full Size Version - Chris Evans talks Captain America. [Entertainment Weekly] - Hey, look at that. Capri Anderson is naked. [Egotastic] - Roger Sterling's book is actually a book. SOLD. [Popeater] - Justin Bieber is just that beautiful. [ …
By: The Superficial / October 28, 2010

Captain America Loves His Old Navy Capris!

Because the last set went over so well (Nerds.), here are actual shots of Chris Evans as Captain America, or more precisely, Steve Rogers, (Okay, I'm the nerd.) while filming in Manchester this morning. Turns out this interpretation of Cap will be light on the shield and tights, but heavy on the …
By: The Superficial / September 24, 2010

Oh, Good, They Remembered the Burrito

Twenty years in the industry, yet poor Carla never made it past burrito-stuffer. "But she's got a crammer's hands," they'd often say... I know I just posted pics from a Marvel movie set, but I'm a giant nerd and this is my blog, so here are the first stunt shots from Captain America in …
By: The Superficial / September 8, 2010