Susan Boyle gets gussied up

April 24th, 2009 // 78 Comments

My hottest pics yet! Here’s Internet singing sensation Susan Boyle sporting a new make-over which is not as intensive as pretty much every media outlet is making it out to be because it’s Friday. E! News reports:

However, a rep for the show insists the cosmetic changes are not something new for Ms. Boyle. In other words, she’s not being put through some sort of insta-celebrity-induced beauty overhaul.
“Her sisters took her to her local salon where she had her monthly trim and a wash in and wash out color put on,” the show’s rep just emailed me. “That is all.”
British newspapers report that Boyle visited the Miss Toner salon near her home in Blackburn, Scotland. The hair job cost $51 and eyebrow pluck about $7, according to the Evening Standard.

To be honest, I don’t really follow the whole reality singing circuit, but I do know that Susan Boyle is more Internet famous than porn these days. In fact, just posting these pics is causing hundred dollar bills to fly out of my monitor. — I thought if I typed that it would come true. *takes off Swami hat* Can’t believe I traded my car for this…

Photos: Fame

  1. to truth


    your first mistake is putting us on the same playing field as the Taliban. Do you know what they do ‘is all in a day’s work’? They have locked school kids in a building, locked all the doors and then lit it on fire, simply because they were girls.

    You cannot compare the 2 situations as if they start from the same place. I say waterboard that motherfucker, Khaleid Sheik What-the-fuck Muhammed, for each of the kids left without a parent on 9/11.

  2. How did the popular conspiracy hogwash about Khaled Sheikh Mohammed creep into a discussion about Susan Boyle’s image? For starters, there is zero proof that KSM was responsible for Daniel Pearl’s murder. According to CIA and other US government sources KSM lied through his teeth, on multiple occasions that resulted in that so-called confession. Not only that, but in that horrible video of Pearl’s execution, two of the men were clearly Caucasians.. they didnt cover-up well enough!

    Furthermore, avery mild version of waterboarding that US Navy Seals undergo in training causes these so-called ultra-tough individuals to break down in hysterics within ONE MINUTE. The type of waterboarding practised at Gitmo on suspects WHO HAVE NOT BEEN PROVEN GUILTY by a court is 100 times more vicious and prolonged; it involves the suspect actually being drowned, (sometimes clinical death occurs), and then being revived by a military physician. Many waterboarding victims are brain-damaged as a result of this torture. The corporate media have presented an easily disgestible ersatz version of what really happens in a Gitmo version of waterboarding, and as always, we swallowed the koolaid. “America doesnt torture?”

    After WW2 a US military court found Japanese officers guilty of committing torture via waterboarding. The sentences tanged from 15 years hard labor, to DEATH BY HANGING. The difference between the Japanese men is that they had a fair trial.. the 100s of Gitmo concentration camp detainees haven’t even been charged with anything. It is only just that those who ordered the waterboarding of the “not guilty until proven so” suspects should be subject to a similar set of punishments, that is, if we have any sense of standards.

    It is highly unlikely that KSM was involved in the planning and masterminding of 9/11; his timeline as available in the public domain clearly indicates otherwise. Furthermore, his “confessions” were obtained under conditions of torture, and thus they have ZERO legal grounds, according to US law. It seems clear that there was an attitude of “get someone, get anyone”, because of pressure from an angry public to do just that; guilty or innocent was irrelevant.

    There are a lot of people who WANT TO BELIEVE that KSM killed Pearl, and masterminded 9/11, because he is (a) ugly and unkempt, (b) a middle eastern Muslim guy, and (c) because the mainstream “axis of weasel’ media have pounded the lies about him for so long now that it has become a part of history, even if the facts don’t fit. It makes us comfortable to lay the blame on someone who looks as nasty and ugly as the crimes ascribed to him. KSM is probably a criminal of sorts, but masterminding 9/11? Lets use our common sense before we engage our ugly biases with a series of equally Pavlovian knee-jerks.

    There is a parallel here with our attitude towards Susan Boyle before she sang, and wowed the world with her wonderful voice and interpretation: her image didn’t fit with what the media have brainwashed the public into expecting how a great sounding singer should look, or how she should dress. Susan Boyle smashed the marketers shallow mold and now the naysayers are eating platefuls of crow.

    At some point in the fairly near future (perhaps before this time next year), the army of cowards baying for Khaled Sheikh Mohammed’s death without allowing him a fair trial, will also be eating heaping platefuls of crow. I hope people understand what I am saying; a far bigger shock than Susan Boyle’s masterful performance is going to descend on the world very soon as regards the world’s most heinous crime of modern times. Brace yourselves.

  3. dude

    for fuckssake STOP THIS MADNESS!!!!!!

  4. WE, europeans, don’t need all the AAAAH’s, OEH’s & OOOH’s of childish america, folks!!

  5. vito

    The Definition of Hypocrisy:

    “If there is somebody captured, I expect those people to be treated humanely. If not, the people who mistreat the prisoners will be treated as war criminals.”

    – George W. Bush, March 23, 2003, responding to an Iraqi TV interview of several captured American soldiers.
    Even with the makeover…she’s not fuckable!

  6. salawhite

    Recently I found a hot club — SeekingTall . c o m — just for sexy tall gals and guys to find their cupid. Come on, tall singles. Don’t miss your love.

  7. Why? but she looks like a MAN now!

  8. Galtacticus

    We wish her the best ofcourse.We always encourage peaceful people and there must be a reason for the hype she has caused.But honestly we think her looks are the reason why she’s spectacular at the moment.

  9. Gando

    There’re whole masses of folks with an acceptable voice for singing but the looks are a bit lacking.

  10. Darth

    Whoof! Whoof! I’m quite an allright singer!

  11. conniecorleone

    Phil (#8), will you marry me?

  12. She has an amazing voice, and I felt really bad about judging her based on looks before I heard her sing. That being said, why are people still talking about her?

  13. yo

    susan boyle…hideous woman with a decent singing voice. i guess thats all you need to become a “breakout” star…that said i know you shouldnt have to be gorgeous to be famous but i wasnt all that amazed by her voice. “voice of an angel”? no. try sarah mclaughlin. i dont know about u guys but the name boyle just doesnt sit right with me. kinda gross.

  14. EuroNeckPain

    Susan Boyle should not be on this site. Despite her obvious extraordinary talent, she was never famous until she reached 47 and found herself at a singing contest by accident. And even there, she almost didn’t make it, because she was not “sexy” enough.
    The superficial is precisely about expressing anger towards the celebrities we are told to worship, who (most of the time) have not enough talent to justify the money they are making. They are ready to do just about anything to get attention and many used their ass a lot to get there. It is a pleasure to bash them.
    To whoever said “You are all probably models and artists and not bored and insignificant, mediocre people”: personally I had the choice between art and engineering, I chose engineering and do not see why I would be more “insignificant” than some anorexic catwalk idiot or finger shit painter.
    Like most other folks on this site, I guess.

  15. Jamie's Uterus

    I’ve had enough of this woman. She’s not that great a singer, and her ‘story’ has been told before. Last year, some fat bald sloppy guy that sang opera did the same exact thing. This is just a media ploy. Ratings for that show must be way down.

    I’d rather have another fat assed sloppy urinal Kim Kardashian story than hear about some unknown woman in the UK.

  16. The entire thing was a publicity stunt. Im amazed so many have fallen for it.

  17. # 8 was actually quite funny.

  18. But I must admit this Satan guy should probable shave – and lose the Fu Man Chu if he wants to broaden his fan base past say–the Masons etc.
    And keep the stick on the ice – that type of thing

  19. probably* shave

  20. Tyler

    Re: The Bible and its accuracy

    “The Bible is filled with scientific accuracy, along with about 3500 prophecies. Not one predictive prophecy from the Bible has ever proven false.”

    - Are you serious? Let me just provide a few examples…FROM GENESIS ALONE.
    1.) # God says that if Adam eats from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, then the day that he does so, he will die. But later Adam eats the forbidden fruit (3:6) and yet lives for another 930 years (5:5). 2:17

    # As a punishment for killing Abel, God says Cain will be “a fugitive and a vagabond.” Yet in just a few verses (4:16-17) Cain will settle down, marry, have a son, and build a city. This is not the activity one would expect from a fugitive and a vagabond. 4:12

    # God promises Abram and his descendants all of the land of Canaan. But both history and the bible (Acts 7:5 and Heb.11:13) show that God’s promise to Abram was not fulfilled. 13:15, 15:18, 17:8, 28:13-14

    “We know that Christian faith is the true one because the Lord told us so.”
    - Umm…you realize that is not an argument, right? If I tell you believing I am the son of God, does that also make it right?

    “Christianity is the only faith that comes with someone who was willing to give up everything including his life for us.”
    - Actually, have you ever heard of HORUS? His story is IDENTICAL to Jesus’, yet he came thousands of years before Jesus. He was crucified to fulfill a prophecy, he was buried in a tomb, rose from the dead, and is said to come again some day to rule for 1000 years. Sound familiar? These are not the only comparisons either. You should Google it.

  21. grace

    she’s UNRECOGNIZABLE. since when did she pluck her eyebrows? totally sold out!

  22. salawhite

    I’m now suggestiong a HOT FREE social dating_­ site called
    *** Seekingtall.C OM *** which I have joined.­ I think it is interesting and you will like it.

  23. john

    #70 is absolutely right. If you want to actually learn something check out the religion part from the zeitgeist movie (this is part 1 of 3 but after seeing part 1 I assure you you will want to see the rest)

  24. Kal

    She looks like she is morphing into Ricky Gervais.

  25. Joan

    Susan Boyle’s beautiful soul shines from within. And her voice is angelic. I loved her and I hope she wins. She has a strong faith in God so I think she will be fine, and have an enduring career. I will definitely be buying her first cd. Can’t wait~

    I actually like the way she looks. She has the sweetest smile.

    Some people of course prefer a woman to be blond, weigh 98 lbs and have fake boobs. Oh, I forgot, this is SUPERFICIAL. com -:)

  26. Susan Boyle’s beautiful soul shines from within. And her voice is angelic. I loved her and I hope she wins. She has a strong faith in God so I think she will be fine, and have an enduring career. I will definitely be buying her first cd. Can’t wait~

    I actually like the way she looks. She has the sweetest smile.

    Some people of course prefer a woman to be blond, weigh 98 lbs and have fake boobs. Oh, I forgot, this is SUPERFICIAL. com -:)

  27. thank you for share

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