Sunglasses. British Airways Stole Sunglasses From Kim Kardashian

May 30th, 2012 // 63 Comments
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Over the weekend, Kim Kardashian accused British Airways of stealing “special items” from her luggage which I just assumed was a clever ruse to leak a sex tape she made with Kanye. Turns out she was only doing the press version of whoring because it turns out the whole thing is over a pair of “priceless” sunglasses her father supposedly gave her, so keeping in the mind the First Rule of Kardashian, just assume everything you’re about read is a lie to Kim having a father because now we know she was hatched from an egg. TMZ reports:

When Kim arrived home from France Friday night, she noticed her luggage was significantly lighter than when she left. A search inside the suitcase quickly revealed the thieves made off with a pair of vintage sunglasses her dad, Robert Kardashian, gave her just before he died — sunglasses she only wore on very special occasions.

ROBERT: Kim, my sweet, sweet Kim, come closer to your father. Remember when I helped O.J. get away with murder and we made a bunch of money from it?
KIM: Of course, daddy, you were so brave.
ROBERT: Well, I took that money and bought you these sunglasses so whenever it’s sunny out you’ll always remember I helped a man get off scott-free for murder so we could be rich.
KIM: Oh, daddy, don’t go. You have so much to teach me!
ROBERT: Remember, Kim, souls can’t buy fancy things… Oh, and your mother’s a whore. *croaks*

Photos: Fame/Flynet, Pacific Coast News

superficial

  1. whiskeyafternoon

    Wait, her luggage is “significantly lighter” after having a pair of sunglasses removed from it? Are they made from Osmium or something? She has all the logic of a colicky 3 year old.

  2. it had to be said

    I appreciate her continued support of the sheer shirt industry, but I wish she’d preach that gospel to some younger, more attractive women.

  3. Jack Ketch

    Also … MMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

  4. lcthewolf

    who ever writes this is an ass hole

    • I think you just called yourself an asshole, non?

    • Dramatic Puddle

      Now that’s not very nice of you; you clearly don’t get the humor. I’ll admit that I get sick of Fish and Photo Boy being lazy shits and covering the Kardashian whores and that nobody Courtney Stodden skank; there are more interesting people out there and more interesting things going on. And I do get annoyed when the boys use this site as a political or morality soapbox; if I want that shit I’ll go somewhere else. I’m not interested in their liberal views because this is supposed to be a FUN site. But Fish is not an asshole. Loosen up.

    • Jack Ketch

      “Asshole” is one word, asshole.

    • El Jefe

      Shut up Khloe.

  5. your mom

    How heavy were those sunglasses?

  6. Voss

    blah, nobody cares

  7. USDA Prime McBeef

    MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMOOOOO

    • kimmykimkim

      McBeef, you inspired me to use more M’s. You can never have too many mmmmmmm’s.

      You’re a damn poet!

  8. Governor Scott Walker
    Commented on this photo:

    This is an awesome pic.

  9. theoriginal LJ

    So, her assistant missed packing her “special sunglasses” at the hotel, and housekeeping probably threw them out.

  10. mrsmass

    i always pack sunglasses in a suitcase that i know will get smashed and thrown around like a mother fucker into the back of a plane.

  11. tits mcgee

    Bench pressing cocks for 15 years has fine-tuned her ability to estimate weight discrepancies of as little as 20g.

  12. Dick Hell

    Did she look for them in her butt crack? I’ll bet they’re in her butt crack.

    • Rapsutin's Evil Twin

      No, but she may have found a couch there, and possibly a small child or two that went missing a few weeks back.

  13. Archie Leach

    When a psycho stalker slices kimkuntrashian into pieces how many persons are gonna show up at the courtroom to cheer on the psycho stalker besides me?

  14. muahah

    booo stop posting this bitch!!!

    why this bitch get 24 comments already while michelle rodrigues and Dominic Monaghan got posted before but only have 14 and 18 comments

    you people are pathetic and obsessed with hating this tramp

    fuck you *superficial* for posting this bitch

    fuck you commenter’s for being obsessed with hating this bitch

    bye

  15. JustWondering

    Her father really should have held on to those sunglasses because he surely could use them now. The fires in the fourth circle of hell must burn very bright.

  16. Juano

    She’s either full of shit or an idiot. Who the hell puts valuables in their luggage? That’s what those giant bags you are always hauling around are for, you stupid jackass! They call them “carry-ons” and while she couldn’t take her pee jar on board, last I checked you could bring glasses and shit on. And how heavy were these f***in’ glasses? Where they made from beer bottles or something (more like specimen jars, I would suspect)?

    Typical celebrity attempt for pity; oh boo hoo, the bad guys at LAX stole my stuff.

  17. Jimbo

    How the hell could you tell if a pair of sunglasses was missing from your luggage? Were the 10 pound sunglasses? Mine only weigh about 6 oz. And since when did this bitch handle her own luggage? She is full of shit

  18. Jade

    Her luggage was “significantly lighter” due to a single pair or sunglasses?

    Sounds like media whoring to me. Pretty desperate to accuse people of steeling just to get your name in the news for free. Shame on you.

  19. Stuart Rudin

    Here I thought it was something important, like her ass napkin

  20. “MOOO”, I said, “MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO”

  21. It’s funny because O.J. Simpson in all likelihood murdered two people and the Kardashians are the direct beneficiaries of it.

    Haha

  22. swalton
    Commented on this photo:

    Ah that old phrase “A pair of sunglasses lighter”

  23. kimmykimkim

    Cheap ass fuckin heifer. You can buy more sunglasses, bitch! Greedy little cunt. MmmmmmmmmmmmmoooooooooooooooooooOoooooOOOOOO!

  24. Frank Burns

    One can only hope the suitcase the glasses were stolen from was a wedding gift from her faux marriage.

  25. Schwizzle

    The last item your dying father gives you, and you take them traveling? Really? Because a film festival is a “special occasion” and they’re so important to you that you let them out of your sight? I keep my costume jewelry on me when I travel for god sakes. Such a load of crap. She travels way too much to be that stupid about luggage security. What a tard.

    • CranAppleSnapple

      Sunglasses, eh? Well now I feel less weird about being given a shoe tree by a dying relative.

  26. Drsuess

    Sunglasses ? Really!!!! …you can’t fix stupid…OH BLOODY HELL!!!
    I can’t resist..MMMMMmmOoOoOoOOoOMMmMOOoOOOOOO..

  27. Well, to be fair, sunglasses made specifically for cattle would be larger and weigh significantly more than human sunglasses. mmmMMMOOOOOOooo!

  28. Alex Milstein

    Why do we all know those sunglasses are sitting on a night stand in a suite in whatever hotel she stayed in because she forgot to pack them. Either that, or she just missed seeing her name in the gossip columns for two minutes.

  29. spartacus
    Commented on this photo:

    MooooOOOOOOooooOOOOOooooOOOO

  30. spartacus
    Commented on this photo:

    MooooOOOOOOooooOOOOOooooOOOO

  31. spartacus
    Commented on this photo:

    MooooOOOOOOooooOOOOOooooOOOO

  32. spartacus
    Commented on this photo:

    MooooOOOOOOooooOOOOOooooOOOO

  33. spartacus
    Commented on this photo:

    MooooOOOOOOooooOOOOOooooOOOO

  34. spartacus
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey girl, great workouuuMooooOOOOOOooooOOOOOooooOOOO”

  35. spartacus
    Commented on this photo:

    MooooOOOOOOooooOOOOOooooOOOO

  36. spartacus
    Commented on this photo:

    MooooOOOOOOooooOOOOOooooOOOO

  37. spartacus
    Commented on this photo:

    MooooOOOOOOooooOOOOOooooOOOO

  38. spartacus
    Commented on this photo:

    She walks like a spaz….. err I mean MooooOOOOOOooooOOOOOooooOOOO

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