It was only a matter of time until Spencer Pratt‘s house of fake-tit cards came crashing down, and it looks like that day has.. come. (Puns!) Vivid’s Steve Hirsch has apparently not seen a single second of man-on-mannequin action despite repeatedly requesting a preview from Jebediah Douchebeard above. TMZ reports:
Steven Hirsch tells TMZ he isn’t going to down to Costa Rica to meet with Spencer about the sex tape — until Spencer coughs up a preview. Specifically, Hirsch says he wants to see at least 30 seconds of whatever it is Pratt’s got.
As we first reported, Pratt is asking for at least $5,000,000 for his library of footage. Hirsch says he asked Pratt to send him some kind of preview because he doesn’t want to be part of any publicity stunt. So far, he hasn’t seen a frame.
I’m going to assume this plan failed directly on its face because there hasn’t been a single peep about the parties involved landing a reality show. Then again, the only doctor capable of using alien technology to move Heidi’s soul from body to body died in a car crash – Damn you, Fox Mulder! – which suggests she might be legitimately hiding in Costa Rica so no one will notice there’s 1/1,000th of a pore out of place behind her left ear.
OR these two are frantically trying to figure out how to fuck on camera before they go bankrupt.
SPENCER: I can’t do it.
HEIDI: What if we just do anal? You like anal – in a sense.
SPENCER: Okay. But you’re going to have to put an oven mitt over your vagina first.
HEIDI: How the hell are we supposed to edit that out?
SPENCER: Why do I always have to come up with the ideas?! *runs away crying*
Photos: Pacific Coast News