Snooki and JWoww: ‘We’re Into Family Values’

October 21st, 2010 // 20 Comments

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH RadarOnline BAHAports:

The pint sized reality star told a Detroit radio show Thursday she “hasn’t had sex in three months” — and RadarOnline.com has the full interview.
Snooki and Jenni “J-WOWW” Farley were guests on the Mojo In The Morning show and Snookster squelched pregnancy
rumors and dished on how she’s not getting any action.
“You have to have sex to get pregnant,” Snooki told the show’s hosts. “We are really into family values and getting married before… (getting pregnant).”

Last night on Facebook, I floated the suggestion that MTV forced JWoww to turn down a $400,000 shoot with Playboy because they want her and Snooki to star in a spinoff where they pretend to be wholesome girls trying to make it in a godless world. Except I didn’t actually believe it because a.) I wrote it and b.) who would honestly be that dumb to fall for such a premise? Then I remember we’re talking about a network whose prime audience watches 16-year-old girls crap out babies and thinks it’s goddamn heroics. MTV could film a cardboard box in an alley for 36 episodes and it’d be a ratings bonanza because we’re all gonna die.

Photos: INFdaily

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  1. Charles Manson

    YEAH MY FAMILY

  2. I don’t dislike her because she’s ugly…I hate her because she’s SO ugly!

  3. dude

    If your snatch is so diseased, putrefied and odorous that no guy can stick his wedding tackle into it, it doesn’t count as abstinence Snooki.

  4. Snooki and JWoww in New York City
    yesyes
    Commented on this photo:

    would definitely fuck the shit outa here…nice rag, motorbooooooat!

  5. Snooki and JWoww in New York City
    yesyes
    Commented on this photo:

    tiiiiiiiiiiiiiits!

  6. MrsEllis

    Two posts on Jersey Shore per day is two more than you should ever have. I understand that they generate easy stories and they are easy to make fun of. But I think this means you should just try a little harder as a blog writer.

  7. She can’t even be talking about mafia-type family, ’cause, y’know, she’s not Italian.

  8. Mr. OBvious

    Did the last guy that slept with Snooki lose a bet? Or was it on a dare? The CDC should quarantine her because of all the STDs she’s carrying.

  9. what she’ll fuck everything from here to west jersey but no smush for the bf. hilarious premise. remwhen paris said she was completely changing her image and wouldnt party no more.. nyuck nyuck nyuck nyuck

  10. Robert Acquafresca

    notice how there was no discussion as to when JWoww last had sex. I am sure it was atleast 3 guys in the past month versus no guys in 3 months for Snooki.

  11. jakes

    WTF This midget Looks like a 60 year old Vietnamese woman, That is just not normal, She might have no wrinkles but she looks like an old asian woman, a Retarded Asian woman, yeah she might have huge boobs but with that face, Seriously this is the first time I have been repulsed by big silicone boobs, her face is too much,
    and that fucking tumor of hair she does at the top, so ridiculous, she looks like a fucking alien, like the bitch alien from mars attacks, This bitch is rich, yet looks like shit, If she was dirty one day, I would think she is a Chinese homeless Crack addict, seriously WTF IS WRONG WITH HER FACE?
    WHY IS SHE SO UGLY

  12. NeNe

    Family values, my ass. This midget is a walking STD.

  13. atotalcad

    the full quote is “. . . hasn’t had sex in three months with people.” But she has had sex.

    You figure it out. “Woof!”

  14. Snooki: ‘I’m not just a member of the Involuntary Celebates of America, I’m the PRESIDENT!!!’

    Abstinence is a choice. Snooki not having sex isn’t by choice. Family Values my ass. This is the basic daily happenings at Jersey Shore:

    - Wake up at 12pm
    - Put on make up
    - Eat breakfast with a drink
    - Go tanning, with a drink

    - Go shopping, with a drink
    - Go home, drink more
    - Eat dinner, with a drink
    - Yell and scream and cause drama with housemates, with a drink
    - Get ready to go to bar, with a drink
    - Drink at the bar, dance, rub up against random strangers
    - Take random stranger home with you, have more drinks
    - Repeat cycle next day.

    Not MY family, not any normal family, ANYWHERE.

  15. RantingOne

    Good Christ this fat cunt looks like Rosanne Barr. I’m beginning to think that her being “famous” is one of the signs of the apocalypse.

    Can’t they make the season finale an episode where they drop a piano on her fat fucking head?

  16. Not a fan

    These two whores would screw anything that would keep them in the press. That snookie looks like a rat with a very tacky outfit.

  17. jonny quest

    She had sex with a leopard, killed it and made a matching dress and cellphone case out of it ! Where is the A.S.P.C.A. when you really need them ? Maybe we could find a local vet to put her down.

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