Thor Has Swim Parties With Matt Damon. Why Not?

January 19th, 2012 // 29 Comments

After proclaiming he’d sired a child deeply into Elsa Pataky‘s womb, here’s The Mighty Thor teaching the dainty Hollywood actor Matt Damon how we grow men in Asgard: “With water slides! Water slides as far as Odinson’s belly can shimmy him away. Ride with me, Jason of Bourne!”

Photos: Fame/Flynet


  1. Chris Hemsworth Shirtless
    Commented on this photo:

    As if the pose wasn’t fruity enough, did he actually pull his ponytail through his cap, like some chick who works the drive-up window at Wendy’s?

  2. Elsa Pataky Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    masturbating on the way down?

  3. Vgirl

    Quickly. Someone needs to run up from behind and de-pants him!

  4. Colin

    Next up, slumber parties with strip poker and wrestling! Please?

  5. Juan Carlos

    They both have latin wives so naturally they get together and talk of their hatred for “white people”. Gee no wonder Matt Damon hates America.

    • Actually, if Damon’s wife is anything like most Argentinians, she thinks her country is the best in the world and our is just some warmongering society filled with idiots…

  6. EricLr

    BEHOLD THOR’S MIGHTY ABS!! Please do not behold his TINY BRAIN!!!

    NOW DO JELLO SHOTS OFF HIS CHEST!! But not in a gay way!

  7. Chris Hemsworth Shirtless
    Commented on this photo:

    “Tootles ladies! Off to hammer Jason Bourne into an ultimatum!!”

  8. Chris Hemsworth Shirtless
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    He had to deal with that attack of killer munchies right then and there.
    “Captain, bring me a bear claw, and another towel”.

  9. Cock Dr

    This series of vacation photos wasn’t nearly as interesting as I had hoped….absolutely no nudity….not one bit.

  10. Chris Hemsworth Shirtless Elsa Pataky Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Sweet Lord he’s hot. I would do the most unbelievably inappropriate things to him he could never imagine even though he prances around like the goddamn Little Mermaid everywhere he walks.

  11. Matt Damon Shirtless
    Commented on this photo:

    worst time to sneeze

  12. Next time Damon spouts off about the plight of the poor school teachers, or how the 1% aren’t doing enough, maybe he can think about the vacay in St. Bart’s on the yacht with the helicopter on the top deck. Fuckhole.

  13. Doreen

    Maybe Matt Damon should thank the teams of nannies and teacher who raise his kids while he and his wife are always off partying.

  14. Chris Hemsworth Shirtless
    Commented on this photo:

    “I saw somewhere that if you slide down like this, it gives you the power to bang models and win Super Bowls.”

  15. ez

    steroids are abundant for hollywood roles.

  16. doctor snuggles

    no doubt about it: HIS ANUS IS HOT, folks!!

  17. Matt Damon Shirtless
    Commented on this photo:

    Um… Hey you guys! I’m still up here! You guys… Oh forget it! I’m going back to lie down.

  18. Chris Hemsworth Shirtless
    Commented on this photo:

    OOwwee! These donuts smell gooood!

  19. Brazen capitalist chick

    Fish, I just wanted to say, thank you. Men like that are meant to be seen and not heard. When I’m a billionaire someday, I’m going to hire him to clean my pool.

  20. Chris Hemsworth Shirtless
    Commented on this photo:


  21. Chris Hemsworth Shirtless Elsa Pataky Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    that first pic is no elsa pataky. at all.

  22. Matt Damon Shirtless
    Commented on this photo:

    Is there an invisible penis he is making his way towards….

  23. Chris Hemsworth Shirtless Elsa Pataky Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey Chris!!!

  24. @Juan Carlos & Topher: In fact, us Spaniards are not “Latin”, we’re european! Caucasian european. Plus Elsa Pataki ( born in Spain, EUROPE) like myself, also has a hungarian parent. How does that make us “latin”? And this is not racism. If I’d been born in, say, Puerto Rico, I’d be proud to be Latina and offended if someone called me “spanish”. I just don’t understand why and how americans constantly confuse people from two different continents…

  25. Oh and, for the record, this might come as a shock to some of you, but neither are Penélope Cruz or Paz Vega “latin” either. People from Spain come from different barbarian tribes ( pre-roman) such as vándalos, alanos, íberos ( iberians), fenicians and celts, to name a few. Then the Romans occupied the Iberian Peninsula, which they called Hispania. But more recently, for seven centuries and up to the 13th century, Spain was massively occupied by the Moors. So, hopefully this will help you see that our ethnic background differs from that of the people you call “Latin”. They descend from their own rich ethnicity or native South American people, sometimes mixed with Spanish, Portuguese or other European ancestry-but sometimes just bearing names from Spain or Portuguese origin, imposed on their ancestors by the bloody conquistadores. Different cultures, different people. Not better or worse. And here concludes the geography/history lecture of the day. Obviously a lot of North Americans don’t get taught this in school, so…just filling the gap for you. You’re most welcome.

  26. Matt Damon Shirtless
    Commented on this photo:

    Hello Fatt Damon

  27. Chris Hemsworth Shirtless
    Commented on this photo:

    Brady doesn’t just win Super Bowls, he wins at slides.

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