Shia LaBeouf Is Plagiarizing Chris Brown Now, Oh Good
“Did you just look at my phone, coffee cup? That’s it…”
“I don’t wanna touch you. I don’t wanna be aggressive. This is the kind of s**t that makes a person abusive,” LaBeouf tells Goth after he steps out of the car, getting visibly upset.
He is then heard pleading with Goth, now wearing his backpack, to return it to him, repeatedly saying to her, “Can I have my bag please?,” “I just want my bag” and “Please just give me my bag.”
At one point during their confrontation, LaBeouf is seen putting his hands up as she approaches him.
Some time later, with his backpack back in his possession, LaBeouf makes a chilling statement en route to the airport.
“If I’d have stayed there, I would have killed her,” he says.
Appearing dejected, LaBeouf says, “It’s hard bro — really f**ked up — in your heart.”
And while that sounds like terrifying evidence of domestic violence, this could just as easily be another retarded performance art piece which I really hope it isn’t because I want this next part to be true. No, fuck that. I need it to be true.
During the car ride, LaBeouf makes an unsuccessful attempt to Facetime his Transformers co-star Megan Fox and subsequently starts smoking.
*climbs into coffin* We’re good here. Beam me up!