Scarlett Johansson Looks Like Hell
There was a time when Scarlett Johannson was considered one of the hottest young actresses in Hollywood and found herself on the receiving end of such penises as Josh Hartnett, Chris Evans and Justin Timberlake. She looks like this now and spent the beginning of the year banging Sean Penn. However, like us, she’s realized that despite all that depressing shit I just said, she somehow looks kind of awesome wearing black leather pants and professionally applied hair and makeup. So of course Scarlett’s hoping for a solo movie starring the most pointless character in Iron Man 2 and soon The Avengers. (Hey. Jon Favreau’s character carried the briefcase suit. Watch your mouth.) Superhero Hype reports:
“I love playing the Widow. I think she’s got a very interesting past, a lot of storylines to explore, and certainly Kevin (Feige) loves that character,” she told us when asked about a possible spin-off. “I think that Marvel has a very personal relationship with their fans, and I think if the fans want it, and the audience wants it, nothing’s impossible. I would love to explore that option as well. Like I said, I love the character and it would be nice to see something nice and gritty.”
Keep in mind this will probably happen because if the comic book industry runs on anything, it’s boners. In fact, I’ll write the entire script for Black Widow right now:
Scarlett Johansson's ass and titties in a tight leather costume. (Maybe CGI her face?) End Credits
I honestly didn’t mean to go that deep into Black Widow’s mythos, but sometimes a good writer knows when to step out of the way and let the characters tell the story. The studio can worry about dumbing it down.