Ryan Gosling Is Saving Women From Taxis Now
“What do you mean you’re the killer, Taxi? I thought we was partners!”
In case women don’t want to fuck Ryan Gosling hard enough, apparently he’s saving them from taxis now because he’s some sort of dreamy knight whose breath probably smells like warm puppy kisses with a hint of cinnamon. HuffPost New York reports:
Laurie Penny– a reporter for The New Statesman, The Independent, The Guardian, Al-Jazeera, and The Nation– tweeted that she began to cross 6th Avenue while looking the other way (because Brits drive on the left side of the road) when Ryan ‘Hey Girl’ Gosling screamed, “Hey, watch out!” and grabbed her before she could be hit by an oncoming taxi.
Penny was able to confirm Baby Goose’s identity when a woman next to her said, “you lucky bitch.”
So let me get this straight, Ryan Gosling mysteriously appears in a crowd, pulls this chick out of oncoming traffic, immediately disappears just as quickly as he appeared and the only way this woman knows it was him is because some chick called her lucky which could’ve just as easily been applied to her not dying? I’m sorry, but I’m going to need to hear a little more detail before I believe Baby Goose is goddamn Superman. I’m talking, “And then some catty ho said ‘you lucky bitch’ before lifting up her skirt and knocking me down with her vaginal wetness like a motherfucking fire hydrant. I nearly drowned.” And you call yourself a reporter…