Turns Out Licking Kristen Stewart’s Vagina Is Bad For Your Marriage. Who Knew?

By: The Superficial / January 28, 2013

For those of you who forget the day true love grew it’s last pure, untainted sparkle-erection, Snow White and The Hunstman director Rupert Sanders was caught going down on Kristen Stewart who was Robert Pattinson’s girlfriend and more importantly not Rupert Sanders’ wife Liberty Ross. And while it seemed like everyone was going to be oddly cool about all this and pretend it never happened, Liberty Ross has apparently decided to defy the Illuminati and file for divorce, so there goes this year’s Baby Sacrifice and Chili Cook-Off. Sonofabtich… TMZ reports:

Ross just filed her paperwork in L.A. County Superior Court. She’s asking for joint custody of their 2 children — ages 5 and 7.
Ross, who is repped by disso-queen Laura Wasser, is also asking for spousal support, as well as attorney’s fees.
Sanders, who is repped by Lance Spiegel, also filed his response to the divorce petition. He’s also requesting joint custody. He is not asking for spousal support. As for attorney’s fees, he wants to share the costs with Liberty.

“So, listen, Liberty, love. I know this is all my fault, and I completely ruined our family, but what do you say you and I both split the cost of the divorce 50/50 like civil adults? It’s just I spent a great deal of money on dental dam- clothes for the kids! Clothes for the kids. The price of shoes today, amirite? Ahaha! Ha… I’ll go start writing you giant checks now. Good talk.”

Photos: Getty, Splash News