Rumer Willis Proves I’ll Post Anyone In A Bikini, Literally Anyone

November 5th, 2012 // 77 Comments

Here’s Rumer Willis in Maui over the weekend because it’s my job to educate people like myself who wonder if her body’s as unfortunate as her face. Turns out the answer is “Not quite, but almost,” so can somebody write that down in a log somewhere for future generations? I can’t see how they wouldn’t want to know about this.

Photos: Fame/Flynet


  1. Rumer Willis Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Well, not a bad body but still not enough to distract us from that face.

  2. Rumer Willis Bikini
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  3. Dan Quayle

    He teflon girdle hung juxtapose willing evil

  4. Rumer Willis Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    She has no idea how to pick a bathing suit that fits.

    • KC

      I had a friend once tell me to go up a couple of sizes on bikini bottoms “So you’ll get more coverage.”
      “So you’ll end up looking like you’re wearing a saggy diaper?!”
      Some women are just idiots.

  5. Sigh, living proof that two beautiful people will not always produce a beautiful spawn. Actually, more often than not, the strong features of two beautiful people do not mesh well. This is an example of one of those times.

  6. Rumer Willis Bikini
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    Haley Joel Osment syndrome.

  7. Rumer Willis Bikini
    hanging telephone
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  8. Rumer Willis Bikini
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    You can depend on Depends.

  9. Rumer Willis Bikini
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    Block the chin, raise arms to pull up boobs…almost can pass for a young Demi herself.

  10. Rumer Willis Bikini
    Bronson Pinchot's Hair
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    With a face like her’s, did anyone expect a nice body?

  11. Rumer Willis Bikini
    Bronson Pinchot's Hair
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  12. Rumer Willis Bikini
    Bronson Pinchot's Hair
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    To me, a woman’s body is like a work of art. Beautiful….. Not this time.

  13. Rumer Willis Bikini
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    It’s like one of those famous optical illusions: are the boobs in front of the face, or is the face in front of the boobs? The chin skews any chance of perspective.

  14. She’s a butterfaceandbody.

  15. Rumer Willis Bikini
    Carl Spackler
    Commented on this photo:

    Penis deflation in 5…4…3…2…1….0

  16. What an idiot

    Please don’t ever post granny panty bikini photos of taterhead ever again…

  17. Rumer Willis Bikini
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    Her body’s not bad, that’s just a fucking horrible bikini.

  18. Rumer Willis Bikini
    Christ Aguilera
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    Her body is not that bad, it’s just a fugly swimsuit

  19. Rumer Willis Bikini
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    YippieeKaNAY! Would rather f the moth…eh, step-mother!!

  20. Rumer Willis Bikini
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  21. inkydink

    why does this girl get ANY publcity? she doesn’t DO anything.

    • You could say that about a dozen different “celebrities” regularly featured here. I don’t think you’re new here—haven’t you recognized the bullshit nature of celebrity culture by now?

  22. Rumer Willis Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    The top says Jr High, the bottom says Grandma.

  23. Rumer Willis Bikini
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Don’t worry about Rumer.
    Her family’s money and power within the entertainment industry will always provide her with a wonderful lifestyle and a variety of attractive sex partners no matter what her face or ass looks like.

  24. El Jefe

    Shitty face and shitty body, this poor girl just can’t catch a break, well except for her massive inheritance that is.

  25. Rumer Willis Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Given the backdrop of flesh in this pic. She is a great example of beauty…

  26. EricLr

    You guys make fun of her all you like. But when terrorists take over your airport and the only way to get at them is to find someone with a chin powerful enough to bust down a heavy vault door, I bet you’ll be singing a different tune.

  27. This young lady has all the money and connections in Hollywood, yet she still can’t get into a plastic surgeon’s office to saw down that jaw line. I don’t get it.

  28. Rumer Willis Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    at least she looks good from behi……nevermind

  29. Talk about getting the shit-end of the stick. Your mom is Demi and you look like Bruce. That must eat away at her on a daily basis. Sort of like Willow Smith looking like a Will clone.

  30. Rumer Willis Bikini
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    She could use some squats.

  31. Rumer Willis Bikini
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    I’d need a fair bit of help from my buddies Jim, Jack and José before tapping that.

    Ah, who am I kidding? I’d spelunk that junk in a heartbeat – she’s got a pulse, right?

  32. Rumer Willis Bikini
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  33. Rumer Willis Bikini
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    I’d just put a bag over her head… and her body… then cut holes in a few strategic places… and do my business.

  34. Rumer Willis Bikini
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    Her body is the equivalent of a 16 hand in blackjack. Any direction you look at it, it’s just not good.

  35. Rumer Willis Bikini
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    I don’t see a problem. She has a beautiful body! So what, she’s not wearing a skanky bathing suit.. I say, GOOD for her!

    • Womb Raider

      Rumor’s never going to read this so don’t bother trying to say nice things in hopes of she-banging her.

  36. Rumer Willis Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    so hit man bruce willis with a bounty on his head goes thru a portal to a weird dimension and finds a younger bruce with a bikini on his body. (played by the amazing joseph gordon levitt)

  37. Jack Ketch

    Just all-around unfortunate looking :( Her mother was never that shit-hot anyways … just a flat, meh face, semi-attractive at best, with a ton of plastic surgery and an ego the size of Cincinnati. I think if the children had been born male, they’d perhaps have been a little better-looking. Or no ? I think all three of them are hideous, lol !

  38. Rumer Willis Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh, no, she committed the crime of not having gigantic hooters! Let’s all make fun of her online!

  39. tom

    Why are — much to our dismay — still the paparazzi after her ?

  40. Rumer Willis Bikini
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    I think she’s messed her ‘big girl pants.’

  41. If she does the backstroke everyone is going to yell “shark!”

  42. Rumer Willis Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Rumer has it that Samantha Ronson prowls the sea, searching for fresh fish to devour.

  43. Rumer Willis Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Body by Nautilus, swimsuit by grandma, and face by Picasso.

  44. MyCoworkerIsHot

    Not bad. With her resources why doesn’t she fix her face? I mean all sorts of people that don’t need plastic surgery get it done, she needs it. Her body is ok tho.

  45. Rumer Willis Bikini
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  46. Rumer Willis Bikini
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    She’s ugly but in a pretty way! Call me!

  47. Beer Baron

    barrel ass

  48. Rumer Willis Bikini
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    She’s still richer than anyone commenting on here, looks better than the majority of the country who is obese, and seems to be keeping out of trouble, unlike lots of celeb kids! Leave her alone!

  49. anonym

    Looks alien.

  50. Rumer Willis Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Not exactly classic beauty material, but neither the post-apocalyptic landscape you would expect from the poor thing’s unorthodox mug. I say she focuses on her non-facial assets and we may even be looking at a career here. Long and lean with miles of legs and a good waist to hip ratio is always close to my heart.

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