Robert Pattinson’s Ready For You Now. Nurture Him, Comfort Him
If you follow The Superficial on Facebook or Twitter, you got to see me acquire a menstrual cycle last night while watching Robert Pattinson’s first post-Kristen Stewart banging Rupert Sanders interview on The Daily Show where the man was just so disarmingly charming that I almost felt bad for making fun of all the hyperventilating fat chicks on YouTube wanting to kill for him. (Almost.) On top of that, he openly admits he doesn’t even have a publicist to preapprove interview questions, so he’s literally just showing up to these things blind to honor his agreements and support Cosmopolis. Do I sound smitten? I sound smitten. Anyway, above are a bunch of pics from his first public appearance, below is The Daily Show interview and even further below that is where a bunch of you will think you’re clever calling Robert Pattinson a faggot while he makes a Skarsgardian transformation into a pile of vaginas just waiting to nurse him back to health because women love broken things. That’s the only way I ever get laid not counting lies, alcohol, identity theft, staged muggings, blackmail, psi-ops, Mario Kart, guerrilla warfare and/or promises of shopping.