Reese Witherspoon Went Surfing

August 22nd, 2011 // 52 Comments

Posted by Photo Boy

Since it seems like today’s theme has inadvertently become Bodies Ravaged By ____ Day, (See: Lindsay = Geological Side Effects, Octomom = Clown Car Uterus, and Snooki = Pickle Juice And Semen) here’s Reese Witherspoon sporting a wet-suit shirt while surfing in Hawaii. I wouldn’t be so crass to imply that pregnancy ruins a woman’s body. Actually, I think I just did that a sentence and a half ago which makes me a liar. In that case, doesn’t Reese look amazing? I bet Ryan Phillippe wishes he’d never moved on to Amanda Seyfried with whom he was able to have sex without worrying about taking a mandible to the jugular. Sarcasm. The laziest form of comedy since home video nut shots.

Photo: Flynet, Splash News

superficial

  1. kaylia

    wet-suit shirt = rashguard..
    fyi :)

  2. Catani

    Sooo…when is her due date??? I’m guessing she has twins.

  3. Ruckus

    When she does the back float, Roy Scheider wants to close the beach.

  4. Carlton Banks

    geological side effects! that had me rofl-in’.

  5. Does her hat say something about loving the cock?

    She needs to take a look at that gut and rethink loving anything that has to do with the cock.

  6. Reese Witherspoon Surfing
    Commented on this photo:

    Stop! in the name of bad stomachs.

  7. Sid

    Her pooch tummy is an homage to her chin. Call her “Double Anvil” now.

  8. Deacon Jones

    So is this bitch pregnant or what? I cant keep track of this shit anymore

  9. Reese Witherspoon Surfing
    Commented on this photo:

    Reese is showing one of the two positions in order to attract Mel Gibson.

  10. Ditty

    Girls with guts are totally where its at.

    You can always retort back to whatever they say by poking your index finger into their belly and saying, “Now hold it right there, little chubs..:”

  11. TheSupFan

    listen–i love defaming sarcasm as much as the next geekie, judgmental cyber user, but this one is really a stretch. (pun only pseudo-intended) the only thing wrong with her body is that she has a tiny bit of belly fat, but if you saw the woman in real life you’d probably be too distracted by her perfect skin and impish frame to even pay any heed to that marriage comfort layer she’s gained. just my opinion, but i feel like this is one celeb body that fish scathing humor really doesn’t need to be wasted on…maybe redirect energies on figuring out how super cute girl from ‘say anything…’ turned into this: http://images.starpulse.com/pictures/2007/02/22/previews/Ione%20Skye-SGG-042569.jpg….

  12. Minky Wail

    Have gunt will travel.

  13. Deacon Jones

    I never found her attractive, either do most guys I’m willing to bet.

    Women love her, same with Anne Hathaway. Classic example of different tastes in women.

  14. Frank Burns

    Football to the groin has moved beyond lazy to ‘classic’:
    http://youtu.be/egsdx_CUYfg

  15. I’d dip her muffin-top in my coffee.

  16. Reese Witherspoon Surfing
    Double D
    Commented on this photo:

    All that her chin is, her ass is not.

  17. Urbanspaceman

    She looks very real, very comfortable.

  18. Reese Witherspoon Surfing
    Commented on this photo:

    Olympic hopeful concentrates as she tries to do a “belly flop.” Oh wait her belly is already a big flop.

  19. Reese Witherspoon Surfing
    Commented on this photo:

    Olympic hopeful concentrates as she tries to do a “belly flop.” Oh wait her belly is already a big flop.

  20. dude_on

    That’s a gravy bump. She is obese by Hollywood standards. Soon she will be forced to compete with Kirstie Allie for rolls.

  21. Reese Witherspoon Surfing
    ktulu
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice fucking gut ho

  22. Reese Witherspoon Surfing
    Stalker101
    Commented on this photo:

    Hanging 10…extra pounds

  23. Jeff Foxworthy

    You know you’re a redneck when you like to wear a baseball cap and a t-shirt while surfing

  24. fcslboy

    Huge chin, beer belly, under bite. I’d probably crack her anyway, I guess.

  25. Reese Witherspoon Surfing
    toopier
    Commented on this photo:

    Donuts. Is there anything they can’t do?

  26. Reese Witherspoon Surfing
    toopier
    Commented on this photo:

    Mommy! I am trying to stack the rings, and I can’t find the big blue one!

  27. Cakeflourz

    Heil!

  28. tlmck

    Oh well. I still have a DVD copy of “Fear” I can fire up as the need arises.

  29. Looks like she should start doing some chin-ups to get back in shape.

  30. forrest gump

    haaaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha, SHE HAS THE BELLY OF AN ALCOHOLIC, folks, hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!

  31. ken

    If she exercised throughout pregnancy and after, she wouldn’t have this gut. But like Katie Holmes, she’s super flabby due to:

    NO EXERCISE.

  32. Gemma

    it’s weird, she clearly knows photogs are present and seems very much on display. You think while she was posing on a surfboard, turning her ‘best side’ to the camera while having a ‘spontaneous surfing moment’ in an inch of water she would think to suck in her gut.

  33. Reese Witherspoon Surfing
    Scott Walker
    Commented on this photo:

    Okay, in this one she DOES look like a praying mantis.

  34. Reese Witherspoon Surfing
    slank
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d still spoon all the gunge out of her snatch and stir it into my espresso.

  35. alle

    you don’t automatically get a gut because you don’t exercise during pregnancy and lets remember her kids are pretty old. She had them young. I think its definitely that “happy” newlywed comfort gut. But honestly its body type. I’m sure I weigh more than her and my legs and but are bigger but I have no gut and my skin isn’t loose like that anywhere. Some people just carry weight in odd places. Ab crunches for a month and she’d be fine.

  36. Lamb

    Wow, this site has really bombed. All the snark without the humor

    • It’s all the fat-ass bitches on here PMS’ing at the same time.

      • TheSupFan

        hey it’s tiny chode again! tell me chodester, what paradoxical universe do you live in in which women (or men) defending and providing explanations for the better treatment of another person (be they male, female, celeb, or common layman) is translated as PMSing? reese witherspoon is not fat, i am not fat, but apparently your skull is very fat and your poor little peanut sized, hateful brain just has no room to function in there. i just hope you’re trolling and not really this craptastic, for human-kind’s sake.

    • TheSupFan

      FFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!

  37. Greedy

    No matter what any of you say, this bitch is still richer than you. Her kid’s dog is richer than you. The crust in her panties is worth more than you.

    Fat people love to snark at their own kind. Nothing cures the pain quite like a quick snark between snack.

  38. Adolf Hitler

    Hey, she’s doing my gang sign! WTF?!?

Leave A Comment