Reese Witherspoon Is Sorry She Got Drunk And Played The ‘Do You Know Who I Am?’ Card

April 22nd, 2013 // 47 Comments
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Seen here remarkably showing up to a screening of Mud last night, the same day news exploded all over the Internet that she and her husband were arrested for DUI and being a drunken crazy woman respectively, Reese Witherspoon would like to apologize for the following hilarious actions. Variety reports:

Toth was pulled over after midnight Friday driving a silver 2013 Ford Focus, which the officer witnessed weaving across a double line on Atlanta’s Peachtree St. Toth appeared disheveled and his breath smelled of alcohol, according to the police report, prompting the officer to administer a sobriety test.
As Toth walked in the Walgreens parking lot where the officer instructed him to pull over to, Witherspoon became increasingly agitated from the vehicle, which prompted the officer to warn her to stay in the car for the sake of her own safety.
“Mrs. Witherspoon began to hang out the window and say that she did not believe that I was a real police officer,” according to the police report. “I told Mrs. Witherspoon to sit on her butt and be quiet.”
Once Toth was placed under arrest, Witherspoon exited the vehicle and was instructed to get back in the car. According to the report, she “stated that she was a ‘US citizen’ and that she was allowed to ‘stand on American ground.’”
The officer then detailed how she resisted as he grabbed her arms to arrest as Toth attempted to calm her down.
As the report details, “Mrs. Witherspoon asked, “Do you know my name?” I answered, “No, I don’t need to know your name.” I then added, “right now.” Mrs. Witherspoon stated, “You’re about to find out who I am.”
The report also specified, “Mrs. Witherspoon also stated, ‘You are going to be on national news.’ I advised Mrs. Witherspoon that was fine.”

Yup, all that happened. And to her credit, Reese Witherspoon has already released a statement to People admitting she had way too much to drink and is embarrassed by her behavior:

“Out of respect for the ongoing legal situation, I cannot comment on everything that is being reported right now. But I do want to say, I clearly had one drink too many and I am deeply embarrassed about the things I said,” the statement says.
It continues: “It was definitely a scary situation and I was frightened for my husband, but that is no excuse. I was disrespectful to the officer who was just doing his job. The words I used that night definitely do not reflect who I am. I have nothing but respect for the police and I’m very sorry for my behavior.”

For someone with a penchant of getting on her high horse, conveniently left out of Reese’s statement is an apology for her husband driving drunk into oncoming lanes of traffic which, oh I dunno, tends to kill people. That said, it is refreshing that she owned up to being so plastered she thought they were being arrested by the world’s most elaborate police impostor. She probably walked into the station going, “Dang, this guy’s good. Real good. But you and I both know there are no guns in this bullet!” *grabs gun, shoots hobo in the foot*

Photos: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, WENN

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  1. BlinkyTheFish

    No matter how sweet and nice you try to pretend you are….In vino veritas. But it does explain why she’s friends with Chelsea Handler. I can’t imagine someone like that hanging around with someone who really was a goody two-shoes.

  2. How can anyone be stupid enough to get a DUI? It’s the most easily avoidable crime.

  3. “In vino veritas”. That’s a good one. I’ve never heard that saying before, but it’s exactly what I was going to say in a different way.

  4. Bane

    Ford Focus?

    LMFAO

    • inkydink

      seriously. this rich bitch and her husband were driving around in a Ford Focus?

    • Well you know, with a Ferrari and the Bentley, the carjacking percentages go thru the roof so the crappy Focus may not be such a bad idea…..

    • If you were somewhere and you saw someone you thought looked like her and then saw her get in a Ford Focus, you would probably assume it was not her. She can afford diamond encrusted Rolls Royces if she wanted, they chose that car for a reason.

      • Did everyone else miss the part where this took place in Atlanta (where she’s filming a movie)? Unless they drove cross-country in one of the luxury automobiles that all Hollywood stars of course have to own, presumably the Ford Focus was a rental.

      • You do know you can rent Rolls Royces, Mercedes and any other car you want in Atlanta, right? You can also have your cars shipped to you anywhere in the world you like. If she wanted a Lamborghini to drive during the movie shoot and then burned it to the ground after the movie was done, the studio would happily buy it for her and supply her with the gas can and matches too.

        Where in my comment did I mention her owning this vehicle?

  5. Reese Witherspoon Arrested Disorderly Conduct Mud Screening MOMA
    Commented on this photo:

    DO YOU KNOW MY NAME?

  6. logan

    Yes Reese we now know who you are. You are a drunk driver. And that is a bad thing.

  7. Hmm. “In Vino Veritas” probably isn’t as appropriate here as “In Vino Podex”

  8. The biggest of the Bull Dykes in prison slowly surrounding her,”“Do you know my name?”

  9. inkydink

    smug phony bitch. she’s trash and her husband looks like a thug. her money will make all of this go away.

  10. Reese Witherspoon Arrested Disorderly Conduct Mud Screening MOMA
    JC
    Commented on this photo:

    “You ever been chin-fucked, Mr. Police Man? ‘Cuz you ain’t gonna like it.”

  11. Reese Witherspoon Arrested Disorderly Conduct Mud Screening MOMA
    FattyFatty2X4
    Commented on this photo:

    “Not by the hair on my Chinny Chin Chin!”

  12. alex

    What a bummer. I thought she was the genuine article. The “I was drunk” excuse is just that, an excuse. “The words I used that night definitely do not reflect who I am.”

    At least she didn’t call him, “sugar-tits.”

  13. That Bastard Tony

    Guess these two nimrods have never heard of car and limo service. These exist so that you can get shitfaced and not have to worry about pulling a Ryan Dunn.

  14. Oddly enough, this reminds me of a joke:

    The class is taking their exams, and the time runs out. The professor dutifully states, “Time’s up. Turn your exams in.” All of the students turn their exams in, except for one student still diligently writing away.

    The professor tells the student to turn in his exam, but he continues writing away, frantically trying to finish his exam. After a couple of minutes of this, the student proudly makes his way to the front of the room and turns in his exam. The following is supposed to be the verbal exchange:

    Professor: “I won’t take that. You continued beyond the allotted time limit.”

    Student: “Do you know who I am?”

    Professor: “I don’t care who you are, I’m not taking this.”

    Student: “Do you know who I am?”

    Professor: “I told you, I’m not taking this.”

    Student: “Do you know who I am?”

    Professor: “I don’t care if you’re the Dean’s son, you’re not turning this exam in. You’ll take a zero on this exam!”

    Student: “Do you know who I am?”

    Professor: “Okay, smartass. I don’t know who you are. Why?”

    The student grabs the whole pile of finished exams on the professor’s desk, throws his in with the pile, and flings the entire pile up in the air and runs off.

  15. Robocop

    So she apologized — big deal. No excuses for her husband driving drunk, nor her belligerent “celeb” attitude. Of course, they’ll get away with it. The media sites are praising her bravery for owning up to her bad behavior. Like she had a choice with the mug shot and arrest!

  16. Reese Witherspoon Arrested Disorderly Conduct Mud Screening MOMA
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    This is NOT the celebrity I would have thought most likely to be handcuffed and brought in on charges this past weekend.
    Ha-ha!

  17. Deacon Jones

    She should be issuing an apology for driving in a Ford Focus

  18. Reese Witherspoon Arrested Disorderly Conduct Mud Screening MOMA
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    Chin up, Reese.

  19. Sandoucheky

    To be honest, I actually kind of like her again because she did/said something somewhat human after a good 7-8 years of being an overly PR-conscious robot who marries gajillionaires

  20. its hard to be a fake person 24 hours a day. Im sure they had a Focus because they need to save their money to donate to Obamas campaign and to save the environment.

    I think the cop went easy on her because he thought she was Courtney Cox

  21. Reese Witherspoon Arrested Disorderly Conduct Mud Screening MOMA
    joe cano
    Commented on this photo:

    OH. MY. GOD, BECKAAAY

  22. Nice job at the wingman duties, Reese – nothing helps out your husband while the cop is giving him the drunk test like screaming shit out the window and repeatedly doing shit the cop told you to stop doing.

  23. tlmck

    In a related story, Mel Gibson offers to help Reese.

  24. DeadHorseKilla

    She was under the legal limit but her chin blew a .20

  25. Other than her husband drunk driving and them not hiring a fucking driver, because you know they are stinking rich, this was kind of funny. I hope there is video of this.

  26. She is in Atlanta filming a movie. The Ford Focus is a rental car. That’s not the real issue here.
    The sad truth is she is just another narcissistic hollywood idiot that believes she is above law.
    The truth comes out in times like these, where she has to live real life unscripted.

  27. dontkillthemessenger

    I must be drunk too because she looks really good in these pics.

  28. So now we know who Reese really is. “I don’t have to listen to police officers because I’m an American citizen! I can stand wherever I want.”

    He should’ve tazed her drunk ass. Notice how she played the “frightened” card. She’s a poor helpless woman and she was scared, so whatever she said and did is not her fault. Bullshit.

    All that said, nothing’s going to come of this because celebrities are above the law.

  29. Reese Witherspoon Arrested Disorderly Conduct Mud Screening MOMA
    Jenn
    Commented on this photo:

    All it takes is a few beers and the redneck shows.

  30. under no illusions

    “Do you know who I am ?”
    “Lady , I don’t know who you are but I know what you are – Arrested!”
    Hollywood self – entitlement ! When your’e drunk , you just drunK!

  31. Weeblo

    Her only mistake was the tense in which see said that. Instead of ‘Do you know who I am” she should has said “Do you know who I was?”

  32. Reese Witherspoon Arrested Disorderly Conduct Mud Screening MOMA
    pavement_smear
    Commented on this photo:

    Smug look just screams “No prison can hold me…got my chisel right here.”

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