The Playboy Mansion Had Secret Tunnels To Celebrity Houses

In an oddly candid, yet ultimately self-serving move, the editors of discovered old blueprints in the basement of the Playboy Mansion and were told by the new general manager, “that’s probably when they built the tunnels in the 70s,” and so they went digging.

So, according [to] this blueprint, tunnels were built to the homes of “Mr. J. Nicholson,” “Mr. W. Beatty,” “Mr. K. Douglas” and “Mr. J. Caan.” We’ll go ahead and assume they’re talking about Jack Nicholson, Warren Beatty, Kirk Douglas and James Caan – all of whom lived near the Playboy Mansion during the late 1970s and early 1980s. There are no dates on the architectural schematics, but the dates on the Polaroids were from 1977.

We asked if we could see the tunnels. A staff member said, off the record, “I heard they were closed up sometime in 1989.” Hugh Hefner married Playmate Kimberley Conrad in 1989. We went back to the general manager, and he said he couldn’t discuss it further.
We then asked The Mansion staff for more info about the celebrity tunnels, and we were told Mr. Hefner did not wish to comment. We reached out to reps for Nicholson, Caan, Douglas and Beatty, and they have not agreed to comment.

Here’s one of the several blueprint images depicting a well-fucked Jack Nicholson strolling back to his house like a goddamn Ninja Turtle which is the only way I prefer to imagine Jack Nicholson having sex with every single woman in the 1970s:

Playboy Mansion Tunnel Blueprint

On a related note, you know how everyone keeps saying there’s no way Bill Cosby didn’t accidentally overdose at least one of his alleged victims and there has to be a body somewhere? Here. Start digging here. Before he sees this.

Photos: Getty /