The Pippa Middleton Butt Hour

May 19th, 2011 // 96 Comments

*looks down SEO checklist*

Arnold Schwarzenegger. Check.
Botox Mom. Check.
Pippa Middleton‘s butt. On it.

Ever since the Royal Wedding, the ass of Kate Middleton‘s sister Pippa has been the object of fascination for, I’m assuming, British men because honestly this thing isn’t doing much for me. Although, that could just be the blood oath I swore to Kelly Brook‘s breasts. Anyway, here’s Pippa walking around West London in tight jeans this morning and I’ll make you a deal, England. I’ll keep these coming if you waive that pesky five year residency requirement for citizenship dub me the Duke of Hugeballsington.

UPDATE: They sent over paperwork in five minutes. Should’ve asked for Wales. Stupid.

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Pacific Coast News, Splash News


  1. Ainoah

    She doesn’t have a great butt, her butt is plain.

    • It barely exists.

      • Parker

        You don’t understand. It’s having a Butt Hour that’s important. Too often its all about the boobs. How many times have we seen one bikini photo after another with nothing but full frontal shots? Some people forget that women have butts too. Hopefully having a butt hour now and then will remind us all of just how much we miss when we focus only on boobs. Sure Pippa’s butt might not be worth more than a moment’s look but what if it was Jessica Alba’s ass in a bikini? Jennifer Anniston wrestling Jennifer Biel in g-strings? Go ahead, picture that then tell me Butt Hour isn’t way overdue.

    • Mike Walker

      The whole fuss was really about the dress. It was very flattering to her somewhat ordinary figure and she/it did look spectacular.

      • Parker

        Mike Walker is suddenly Valentino. Was it the Lace Frill Bodice or the Chiffon Taffeta Clowns neck that struck your fancy, Mr. Valentino?

      • GeorgeWBush

        Gotta agree, that dress really made a difference. The way she dress in these pics, looks like she’s a walking ad for lez-b-friends – not that there’s anything wrong with some hot girl on girl action.

    • Ariel

      I really think she is very plain. and her butt is nice but is nothing special. My goodness that tan is over the top. She sometimes looks ghastly in her face and sometimes looks quite flattering. (inconsistent) she has good style though,however that’s about it.
      Kate is has a more interesting lovely face than Pippa – I’m sorry! I think men made a fuss about her because they couldnt do that about kate cuz she’s getting married, and pippa’s figure in that white dress was very flattering and the cut made her waist look tiny, therefore her butt more shapely – in my opinion I think she barely has one as she’s so slim.
      It just goes to show anyone can dress up and look better and in the right social status and opportunities can trick society ever so subtlety, to love them and make a big fuss about them. But hey, its her moment in the sun, while it lasts. She’s moreso cool than an exact hot commodity which isn’t so bad! Good on her! as long as its all in good fun.

  2. puddleduck

    Is this the only woman in the free world with an ass? You would think so ….

  3. Ellen

    Those Middleton girls aren’t much for hips…but they’re quite adorable!

  4. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    It looks like her butt is trying to run away.

  5. direchef

    Well, the Brits have a saying, “An ass like a ten year old boy.” There it is.

    • Mumbles

      Not only is that not a saying but no-one in Britain says “ass” unless they’re quoting an American.

    • sorry, there it isn’t. they use “arse” in britain, from ze german vord, arsch.

      i’d give her the biz but if she weren’t famous for being the sister of someone who married someone famous, i’m sure none of us would give it much thought.

      and ffs it’s CRUMPET not strumpet. fucking doesn’t anyone read?

  6. RoboZombie

    That’s a MAN, man.

  7. I feel better I’m not the only heterosexual male who doesn’t get what all the fuss is about here.

  8. C3PBro

    What butt? Clearly people in England have never seen an actual ass. Just one more thing that makes our great nation better than any other place in the world.

  9. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    …or lack of, in this case.

  10. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Pippa so flat
    Commented on this photo:

    Pippa has no hiney??

  11. Pippa Middleton Butt
    chris breezy boxing academy
    Commented on this photo:

    perhaps “the pippa middleton butt minute” would’ve been more appropriate

  12. Richard McBeef

    the only butt I can see is the butt in buttahface.

  13. This Pipa Mania is getting old in the EXTREME. She’s a rather plain looking girl, with an average looking body. She didn’t “steal the show” at the wedding, she doesn’t have a sex tape, and the only risque photo they could find of her was LESS revealing than the swimsuit pics everyone was unimpressed with.

    LET IT GO. The royal wedding is over, and an impressive amount of the world didn’t care, and we will continue to not care until the next drunken car crash in Paris.

    • Richard McBeef

      i don’t plan on caring after the next drunken car crash in Paris either, but I will keep my fingers crossed.

      • Deacon Jones

        Yes McFeely, but in the “looks” department, she’s the Marissa Miller equivalent over there,,,there’s not much to look at.

  14. There is no apps for rough

    Who cares. Far more unattainable than others thats featured on here.

  15. JN

    Let us know when you find her butt.

  16. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    lovely bum, thank you pap for getting it right

  17. fish, in this context it’s ‘bum’ not ‘butt’

  18. cc

    I’ll take her somewhat narrow, FIT, behind over the blubbery behinds of Kim K or J Lo and day of the week. Especially Kim K’s lard ass.

  19. 1985

    Now I know where those old acid-washed jeans I donated to the Vietnam Vets ended-up. Perhaps she has my Members Only jacket too….

  20. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s maj-ass-tic. In the same sense the ass of a 12 year old boy is. But what can I say… I’m not only a supporter of NAMBLA, I’m the founder!

  21. The Lord Almighty

    She has a butch face. Her sister is far more attractive. I don’t understand the fascination with her.

  22. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    Anyone who doesn’t love that has has never felt the warm, clenched embrace of a tight sphincter on their baloney pony. I have, and do want.

  23. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    DAMN autocorrect!! My post should have read:

    Anyone who doesn’t love that ass has never felt the warm, clenched embrace of a tight sphincter on their baloney pony. I have, and do want.

  24. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    Joe Perry is looking pretty youthful these days.

  25. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    Did I somehow take a wrong turn and end up on the IHOP website?

  26. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    Meh. Maybe they should hire an actress to say she shot it full of botox.

  27. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    she has no curves and no hips, this looks like a mans ass from the 80s…

  28. tally

    awwwee! you’re fucking disgusting superficial writer. pippa middleton BUTT HOUR? somebody’s REALLY desperate..

  29. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    remember that episode of “Wings” where Brian and Roy were too busy checking out some chick at a telephone’s ass to respond to something they were asked, but when the chick turned around it was a guy, and both of them had to shake themselves out of what just happened?

    this is nothing like that. *shudder*

  30. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess Kim Kardashian, Nicki Minaj, and Amber Rose have all never step foot in this country.

  31. Yeezy's Son

    I went for a walk at lunch and saw at least 5 chicks with asses that were more impressive. Don’t get me wrong Pippa could get “it” any day anytime. But she’s nothing spectacular. In the words of famous Brit Simon Cowell, “So what.”

  32. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    Where is this “ass” everyone speaks of? /headscratch

  33. Rancid

    I would do her. But only because trees have more sex than I do.

  34. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    What a bottom! I like!

  35. Mr Obvious

    Oh goodie. I don’t see what the big deal is. There are women at my gym with much nicer asses. Are men in Britain so starve for some decent butts that this is their Goddess of Back Side (Venus de Tush)?

    • V

      Maybe men in Britain have nicer, more down to earth taste than men in America who are corrupted by reality tv stars and women that look like strippers? Which is hilarious considering how most women in America look nothing like that, aka they’re fat?

      I don’t know what you’re complaining about, everytime I visit America the first thing I notice is that girls have NO ASS AT ALL. And those who do have asses have like three.

  36. Venom

    She is not the hottest, but she is not bad.
    Banging her would be like banging princess adjacent. Not quite a princess, but close enough.
    She seems like fun.
    A threesome with her and Princess Beatrice might be pretty epic…

  37. vitobonespur

    Fair to middleton. I mean fair to middlin’. A profille shot would be beneficial.

    On the other hand: “Put that filthy thing back in your trousers. I have no intention of even touching it, let alone sucking on it…Oh MOTHER!”

  38. JN

    Micro-penis, eh?

  39. cristina

    sorry, I just don’t see the big deal about her, Kate’s way prettier

    • V

      I think Pippa’s cute. People just want a new public figure they can obsess with but not respect, like the princess to be Kate. They like Pippa now. Wait a few years. It wasn’t even a week after the wedding when pics of her partying surfaced. They weren’t even that shocking. American celebrities do much worse.

      Anyway, I think she is cute, but peopleare definitely exagerating a bit.

  40. EarnMoreSessionsBySleeving

    I like her butt.

  41. Mumps

    When did Canadian tuxedos become fashionable again?

  42. DS

    This chick isn’t attractive at all. I don’t get the fascination. Is it just because she is skinny?

  43. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    Proof that the Red Coats are all, in fact, gay. Viva 1776!

  44. Butts, cooking and dentistry…Rule, Britannia!

  45. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    My kid watches an animation series named Pippa Pig. Pretty funny.
    Other than, MILF Liz Hurley, the Britts don’t have much to lust after so Pippa’s arse is a valuable assset.

  46. Clarence Beeks

    I think Pippa has a great little body, but her face is nothing special at all. Kate is so much prettier. The media need to stop trying to turn this girl into a sex symbol. She is NOT hot.

  47. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    I agree. She’s cute but has a flat ass.

    Oh what the fuck, I’ll pull my pud anyway.

  48. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    yeah im gay, you got me, sorry no, your gay if you lke the look a mans ass on a woman, women should have curves and hips…so that makes you gay…my god ive been in the closet for 36 years…my wife is gonna freak,LOL…losers.

  49. Speaking as a professional psychologist, I would say the fascination with Pippa has to do with the possibility that she goes off the rails as on a whoring binge, in order to create a fame and identity for herself that is separate but equal to her princess sister’s.

    • Speaking as a TS commentator, you’re full of shit. The fascination is with her heiny, her butt cheeks – rubbing one out to thoughts of her getting herself off anally while riding one’s lap. It’s no more complicated than that, Sir Isaac ‘Dreg’ Newton.

  50. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    I am lookin, and I’m not seein anything but a flat ass.

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