1. Apparently, divorce agrees with you, Ashley Call me.

  2. td

    Good to see her drop a few lbs.

  3. That dog has been dead for three days now.

  4. Bonky

    Honey, you really should bury that thing, it’s starting to stink.

  5. Dropping that dog off at the pound.

  6. That dog is not dead…it’s just looking down at the ground wondering if it fell on it’s head from that distance, he could become dead.

  7. “WAAAAAAAAAAA! I can’t believe my dog is dead! WAAAAAAAAAAA! This is the worst day of my life! WAAAAAAAAAAAA! Ooh…Paparazzi!”

  8. So, when you come back with the money, I’ll fix then other eye.

  9. That’s her psychological support dog, Shug! Aww, Shug carried her for so long, now she’s happy to carry him.

    Clearly, she would’ve made a fine Senator.

  10. George P. Burdell

    She needed a corpse for Amanda Seyfried’s “Build-a-Pet” party.

  11. “As it happens, this is exactly what we’re learning to make in my Chinese cooking class, so hell yes I’m taking it home. Finders keepers…”

  12. crb

    “Why yes. Yes, I am such a self-righteous neurotic c**t-waffle, I can kill domestic animals just by picking them up!”

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