1. …because if there’s one thing a 6′ tall woman needs, it’s platform shoes!

  2. Let me tell you about the time I dated gulliver , my little oompa loompa.

  3. Senor Trout

    Mario, honestly now – do these shoes make my cheeks look chubby?

  4. it had to be said

    Lady on the left: “I thought she would have that torch in her hand and the book in the other like on TV.”

  5. She should have brought something for Slater to stand on too.

  6. Well that’s my secret Mario, I’m always angry…

  7. EricLr

    And what kind of candy would *you* like, little boy?

  8. How does a landscaper like Mario Lopez land a job like that? He should be standing outside of Home Depot looking for work.

    • Devilish Diva

      Dude, as much as I hated Saved by the Bell and all those dimwit “actors” on that show, just because Mario Lopez is Hispanic American doesn’t make him a fucking migrant worker.
      No need to hate Mario ’cause he’s got a much better job than you. He’s got a job. Period. You’re probably fat and unemployed living in your parents’ basement.

      • Joaquin ingles

        Burn… the dreaded mother’s basement retort!

        I thought he was a spinach picker though.

      • Devilish Diva

        The parents’ basement retort is a cliche for a reason b/c it’s true.
        And Flynbyu’s post is the same thing…an overwrought cliche and stereotype ignorant loser white people use to make themselves feel better esp. in this economy.
        At least mine has a basis in truth.
        So burn this, mofo…

  9. SIN

    Don’t piss her off. She damn near made it to the Olymipcs once as an archer.

    • Sure, but the level of competition has really come up since the Games of the First Olympiad.

    • Snack pack

      Years ago, she made an appearance on Letterman where she demonstrated her archery prowess outside the studio. And she did it in heels, a tiny dress and nothing else. A fond memory of mine.

  10. “And that’s when I realized I could kill with my bare hands.”

  11. Jason

    She’s pretty tall, but he’s also legally considered a dwarf.

  12. I would absolutely ruin her. Twice.

  13. You don’t go down on her, you go up.

  14. hijkmno

    those shoes are stupid.

  15. The Leaning Tower of Geena Davis is always exactly 6 degrees to the right of the horizontal.

  16. EZ-B

    Face: circa 2009. Legs and knees: circa 1909

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