1. dontkillthemessenger

    The Ryan Seacrest method of touching a breast while keeping down vomit.

  2. “according to the pop up timers, those are done now.”

  3. In today’s nobody news, one nobody feels up another nobody. But first, the People of Walmart!

  4. Bonky

    This is not news. That is the official handshake of Mauritius.

  5. BlackAndWhiteMinstrel

    “Quick feel for the cripple? Bless you ma’am.”

  6. “you do look a bit tired, here…let me check your temperature”

  7. Venom

    Every time I see this chick on TV she just comes across as a raging bitch and straight up crazy.

  8. cc

    Geez, is that the first tit he’s ever seen?

  9. Checkin’ the ol’ redneck weather station, I see.

  10. *jedi wave* “It’s cold outside. The temperature is dropping quickly.”

  11. tlmck

    He’s whacking off with the other hand while reciting some Shakespearesque nonsense just like he does in his movies.

  12. EricLr

    Wait…Claire Forlani is still alive?

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