superficial

  1. it had to be said

    Mike Tyson Speaking Tour and other Great Moments of words strung together than cannot possibly be true, tomorrow at 11.

  2. Deacon Jones

    “Mike, Mike! What’s the tipping point in terms of going with either a Roth IRA or 401k if you’re self-employed and 50% of your income bracket is a write-off ?!”

  3. Jack London's sober moment

    I hope there are subtitles, because when he speaks it’s like trying to figure out what the hell “Yellow Ledbetter” is about. I’d love to see him subtitled in some elegant romance language like Italian or French.

  4. “Da guy thaid he couldn’t heow da bell, tho i juthed made it eathiah for da guy ta heow!”

  5. ThisWillHurt

    “Wuthup, Authralia? I will rape yo ear-th wif my wordth!”

  6. That’s right, Tyson. I got 5000 points. My fingers are faster than your fists.

  7. Of all the things I never expected to hear Mike Tyson doing, “speaking tour” is right up there.

  8. Isn’t being able to talk a requirement to go on a speaking tour?

  9. When is Marlee Matlin doing her speaking tour?

  10. stevebrt

    Doesn’t Australia have pretty strict rules on barring those with serious criminal convictions , like I don’t know , rapists for example

  11. zomgbie

    i ate dem!
    jutht wike i thed-
    i will eat yowa childwen.
    thee?
    i ate dem.

  12. karlito

    eye speak words in a row with squeaky voice

  13. That’s one “Come at me bro” I’d like to avoid.

  14. O'chunt

    Oh, a speaking tour. At first glance I thought he was conducting a symphony orchestra.

  15. His speaking tour? His SPEAKING tour!?! His @#%’ing SPEAKING tour?!?

  16. Tiger

    “I don’t know what I’m doing up here, either, but I’m gettin’ paid!”

  17. Phoenix

    “Don’t juth thit there. Thuck it!”

  18. The collective "meh"

    “Ahm Mike Tyson. Ah wasth de undesthpu… de undesthpu…

    “Sceruw dis! Es tew hawd! Ah Givup!”

  19. Tron

    Bam! There ya go…pants on da ground! Whatcha gonna do?!

  20. LordViperScorpion

    Don’t you mean DOCTOR Mike Tyson? That’s right, he has a PhD. Seriously, look it up.

  21. Bonky

    Note to self: NEVER get a face tattoo.

  22. LilDeuceDeuce

    Duckfathe.

  23. ruby

    Who let this fucknut in? What is wrong with this country?

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